"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
A true Don Juan
- Thread starter dutchmaster
- Start date
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
ahahaha awesome but again every mangina/vagina is calling him a piece of sh!t... it must feel great to live in a woman's idea of the perfect world(you must only fvck one of them at a time ) good life to all the people in the matrix
Maximummax
Senior Don Juan
Every man should be like this!
Notice at 6:48 ''I really don't know any more''
Her gut Attraction and Interest Level in him even outweighs her common sense and her intelligence...It still keeps her with him, despite how he treats her.
This guys mastered it. She falls right into his hands
NB: Notice how Jeremy, Society, audience try and demonise his Alpha behaviour...
Her gut Attraction and Interest Level in him even outweighs her common sense and her intelligence...It still keeps her with him, despite how he treats her.
This guys mastered it. She falls right into his hands
NB: Notice how Jeremy, Society, audience try and demonise his Alpha behaviour...
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
dutchmaster
Senior Don Juan
I'm sure he's slept with good looking girls, just he found one willing to basically do everything for him. you hear what he said? She shaves the hair on his "back sack and crack" every other night for foks sake, gets him beers from the fridge, watched him sleep with other women and she's still madly in love with him. Also notice how cool and calm he remained through the whole ordeal, guys a true don juan whether he acts/looks cheap or not.remotecontrol said:
Yep, seems the crowd is filled with AFC's or jealous guys which is equally as bad. When I was watching it I couldn't get why they were laughing, i figured anyone that knows at least something about being an alpha or the way of Don Juan would appreciate this guy and understand he's doing it right.Hyper2010 said:
Atom Smasher
Master Don Juan
We have to remember that neither of these people are mentally stable in any way. The guy is drunk and the girl's behavior and attitude speaks for itself.
The guy's ****y attitude is admirable but nothing more. My point is that these are both sick individuals and are in no way representative of anything we should aspire to be (except, of course, for the confidence).
He was also oddly truthful. He was saying how he has gotten pudgy and isn't the best looking guy anymore at 42.
Someone mentioned the crowd laughing. It seems they were laughing because he kept on calling the host by the wrong name.
It sounds like his brush with illness brought on by the alcohol might have straightened him out some, judging by the letter the host read.
Yup, a very cool, laid back individual, projecting self command on the surface. But alcoholism is anything but self command. Still, an excellent find and there are things to be learned here.
The guy's ****y attitude is admirable but nothing more. My point is that these are both sick individuals and are in no way representative of anything we should aspire to be (except, of course, for the confidence).
He was also oddly truthful. He was saying how he has gotten pudgy and isn't the best looking guy anymore at 42.
Someone mentioned the crowd laughing. It seems they were laughing because he kept on calling the host by the wrong name.
It sounds like his brush with illness brought on by the alcohol might have straightened him out some, judging by the letter the host read.
Yup, a very cool, laid back individual, projecting self command on the surface. But alcoholism is anything but self command. Still, an excellent find and there are things to be learned here.
6:52 and 8:20 are right on point. This is what guys need to realize about women who complain about their OWN choices, and stick with those choices. That would be the end of the emotional tampon gig. A lot of guys do this because they try to pursuade her, and believe she's the victim - based on her claims. Then, they ***** when she sticks through the same BS that she started. She's not going to leave; that's her own fault. Stop proving how great and different you are.
As for the guy... He's obviously a bad person; not someone worth looking up to. He destroys women's self-esteem to keep them dependant on him. Weak. Not a real man at all. Doesn't have any kind of personality or intelligence. I knew a lot of people like this back in the day. They were successful, but worthless. The women weren't all that great, either. Low self-esteem, depression, bitterness, etc BEFORE getting involved with them. This is who bad people seek out - they're predators. The "victim" isn't a victim, however - there's no such thing.
I don't think any of the "mangina's" are hating on him. When someone is a narcissistic, selfish, unpleasant douche bag or douche bagguete, everyone hates them - except those who find them physically attractive. They're the only ones not seeing things clearly, and viewing them as misunderstood. They're hated on, and disliked for good reason.
This is a cue guys should be taking when dealing with women. Does everyone hate her, or only use her for sex? It's probably because she's a *****. Not the misunderstood victim. Don't sympathize with the damsel in distress who's hated on by everyone; has no friends; *****es about everyone; etc.
The interviewer and the woman both made the mistake of trying to get through to, and change him. Get him to see the light. Another big mistake. I'd be willing to bet that she's doing all this stuff to get him to come around. If she gives him all this love and affection - he will return the favor, and become nice back.
Which, is another mistake a lot of GUYS make with *****es. Gotta accept people for who they are, and understand that they're not going to change. Being good to a bad person isn't going to change them into good. It's important that you realize this. If the girl you are pining after doesn't realize this with her "bad boys" - that's her fault. As you can see, logic doesn't work. Stop trying to convince her to leave the dumbass...
It's the traits that people should be looking at - not his behaviors. Making women laugh is a good one. Holding back is another. A lot of jerk-like behaviors are very effective. No question. But, you don't want someone to hate you if you're a decent guy, right? Adapt these kinds of traits into your game, and you're good. You don't have to be bad like this guy to be successful.
As for the guy... He's obviously a bad person; not someone worth looking up to. He destroys women's self-esteem to keep them dependant on him. Weak. Not a real man at all. Doesn't have any kind of personality or intelligence. I knew a lot of people like this back in the day. They were successful, but worthless. The women weren't all that great, either. Low self-esteem, depression, bitterness, etc BEFORE getting involved with them. This is who bad people seek out - they're predators. The "victim" isn't a victim, however - there's no such thing.
I don't think any of the "mangina's" are hating on him. When someone is a narcissistic, selfish, unpleasant douche bag or douche bagguete, everyone hates them - except those who find them physically attractive. They're the only ones not seeing things clearly, and viewing them as misunderstood. They're hated on, and disliked for good reason.
This is a cue guys should be taking when dealing with women. Does everyone hate her, or only use her for sex? It's probably because she's a *****. Not the misunderstood victim. Don't sympathize with the damsel in distress who's hated on by everyone; has no friends; *****es about everyone; etc.
The interviewer and the woman both made the mistake of trying to get through to, and change him. Get him to see the light. Another big mistake. I'd be willing to bet that she's doing all this stuff to get him to come around. If she gives him all this love and affection - he will return the favor, and become nice back.
Which, is another mistake a lot of GUYS make with *****es. Gotta accept people for who they are, and understand that they're not going to change. Being good to a bad person isn't going to change them into good. It's important that you realize this. If the girl you are pining after doesn't realize this with her "bad boys" - that's her fault. As you can see, logic doesn't work. Stop trying to convince her to leave the dumbass...
It's the traits that people should be looking at - not his behaviors. Making women laugh is a good one. Holding back is another. A lot of jerk-like behaviors are very effective. No question. But, you don't want someone to hate you if you're a decent guy, right? Adapt these kinds of traits into your game, and you're good. You don't have to be bad like this guy to be successful.
Is he a manipulative ******* for taking advantage of the services of a girl who loves him? Or is this just a situation the girl willingly put herself in? He is honest towards her about his wants, needs and activities.
If a girl has high IL, she might do anything for a man. Can we really blame him for taking advantage of that?
I have also met a girl, and I told her there were 3 other girls competing for me. She started to like me even more. That's basically what this guy does. I let that girl s*ck my ****, and I think she's still in love with me, because she messaged ME, after some guy proposed to HER, to get some CLOSURE.
So, what, I'm an ******* because I put my penis in her mouth?? I was just doing what society told me to do. Not to mention my instinct.
On the other hand, to take a person like this and make them into your slave?? Hmmmm... I condone this behaviour. A true beta needs an Alpha to dedicate themselves to.
On yet an OTHER hand, it is the same dispicable behaviour we see when a girl takes some chump and turns him into her little b*tch. Women try and do it to men, but that's just against the natural order of things. Let the woman dedicate herself to a man who is preoccupied, it is the way of life.
If a girl has high IL, she might do anything for a man. Can we really blame him for taking advantage of that?
I have also met a girl, and I told her there were 3 other girls competing for me. She started to like me even more. That's basically what this guy does. I let that girl s*ck my ****, and I think she's still in love with me, because she messaged ME, after some guy proposed to HER, to get some CLOSURE.
So, what, I'm an ******* because I put my penis in her mouth?? I was just doing what society told me to do. Not to mention my instinct.
On the other hand, to take a person like this and make them into your slave?? Hmmmm... I condone this behaviour. A true beta needs an Alpha to dedicate themselves to.
On yet an OTHER hand, it is the same dispicable behaviour we see when a girl takes some chump and turns him into her little b*tch. Women try and do it to men, but that's just against the natural order of things. Let the woman dedicate herself to a man who is preoccupied, it is the way of life.
Chamber: Agreed on point A. She put herself in that position, and decided to stay. She's not a victim, and the interviewer said he had no sympathy for her. This is a far-cry from what Dr. Phil would say. Man, I hate that guy... But most of his audience is female... Gotta go where the money is.
The guy is still a ****face for doing it, though. He knows what he's doing. She's not innocent for tolerating it, and he's not innocent for doing it. "Oh, she's allowing herself to be manipulated, so I'll keep doing it." No. Just because you can - doesn't mean you should. Do you HAVE to bully the kid who doesn't stand up for himself? No, you do it because he's weak - and so are you (not you specifically).
Disagreed on point B. You're trying to justify doing bad things - by saying everyone else does bad things, and its the only way to get ahead. Can't be an angel in a world full of demons, so might as well join the dark side. This is the same mindset former nice guys and girls have. Really, everything you say fits into this. They were the victims, so they become the abusers/players/whatever - while trying to justify everything they do. "Oh, its not MY fault - they're the ones who respond favorably to, or deserve it." Blah.
You don't have to stoop yourself down to appeal to anybody.
The guy is still a ****face for doing it, though. He knows what he's doing. She's not innocent for tolerating it, and he's not innocent for doing it. "Oh, she's allowing herself to be manipulated, so I'll keep doing it." No. Just because you can - doesn't mean you should. Do you HAVE to bully the kid who doesn't stand up for himself? No, you do it because he's weak - and so are you (not you specifically).
Disagreed on point B. You're trying to justify doing bad things - by saying everyone else does bad things, and its the only way to get ahead. Can't be an angel in a world full of demons, so might as well join the dark side. This is the same mindset former nice guys and girls have. Really, everything you say fits into this. They were the victims, so they become the abusers/players/whatever - while trying to justify everything they do. "Oh, its not MY fault - they're the ones who respond favorably to, or deserve it." Blah.
You don't have to stoop yourself down to appeal to anybody.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Well no... He supports her and she tends to him. Fair trade imho. Then he had a second woman come in. The man is organising his own harem. What's wrong with that??
Just because western culture doesn't condone this behaviour doesn't make it wrong.
And if he is being HONEST towards her, is he really manipulating her? Isn't MANIPULATION obscuring facts in order to get someone to see things a certain way?? I think this man lays down his idea's plain and simple, and she can either agree and stay or disagree and leave.
Just because he's the wage earner, doesn't mean he's manipulating her. I don't get the problem.... Sorry.
Edit: After watching the video again, I see the worst thing they can pin on him is that he won't have children with her. Sounds like he's within his rights...
And I wasn't
Just because western culture doesn't condone this behaviour doesn't make it wrong.
And if he is being HONEST towards her, is he really manipulating her? Isn't MANIPULATION obscuring facts in order to get someone to see things a certain way?? I think this man lays down his idea's plain and simple, and she can either agree and stay or disagree and leave.
Just because he's the wage earner, doesn't mean he's manipulating her. I don't get the problem.... Sorry.
Edit: After watching the video again, I see the worst thing they can pin on him is that he won't have children with her. Sounds like he's within his rights...
And I wasn't
I was saying that society programmed me to try and get *******s if the chance were to occur, It was actually an AFC move if you analyse it like that. I wasn't aware of social programming, but I am now. Doing what society tells you to do, is generally the exact opposite of how to get ahead.
The fact that he's hurting other people makes it wrong. Nothing to do with social acceptance. This guy is a jerk. All he cares about is himself - regardless of who gets hurt. He probably knows this, but doesn't care.
Jerks are usually honest and manipulative at the same time. That's where the trickery comes in, and why its hard to identify one. They'll say something that seems genuine, and it might even be so at face value, but they're doing it with an ulterior motive. If you don't believe that this guy doesn't know what he's doing, you must have not known very many jerks. They are very subtle and clever. The whole point is that you don't know what they're doing, so they can keep doing it.
For instance, let's say she doesn't do x or y - do you think he's going to remain idle about it? Doubtful. He would probably conive his way into getting it somehow. Or, when he acts a certain way - he KNOWS its going to result in w or z. Otherwise, he wouldn't be doing it. It has to be benefiting his selfish interests. Of course, we have no evidence of this, but it comes with the territory. Especially if she's acting distant, or tries breaking up with him... Guaranteed that he would get her back.
Now, you could argue that this applies to everyone and their dealings with other people, but there's a difference between how genuine people approach these situations vs the jerks way of handling it.
Jerks hold the carrot - while the victim is the donkey. There is no way this guy is doing NOTHING, and she just keeps pining after him. It doesn't work that way. He is enabling this. In the process, he is treating her like crap in general. It's all right there.
I've known, dealt with, befriended, and dated so many people just like that guy. He's the poster child for jerks around the world.
Jerks are usually honest and manipulative at the same time. That's where the trickery comes in, and why its hard to identify one. They'll say something that seems genuine, and it might even be so at face value, but they're doing it with an ulterior motive. If you don't believe that this guy doesn't know what he's doing, you must have not known very many jerks. They are very subtle and clever. The whole point is that you don't know what they're doing, so they can keep doing it.
For instance, let's say she doesn't do x or y - do you think he's going to remain idle about it? Doubtful. He would probably conive his way into getting it somehow. Or, when he acts a certain way - he KNOWS its going to result in w or z. Otherwise, he wouldn't be doing it. It has to be benefiting his selfish interests. Of course, we have no evidence of this, but it comes with the territory. Especially if she's acting distant, or tries breaking up with him... Guaranteed that he would get her back.
Now, you could argue that this applies to everyone and their dealings with other people, but there's a difference between how genuine people approach these situations vs the jerks way of handling it.
Jerks hold the carrot - while the victim is the donkey. There is no way this guy is doing NOTHING, and she just keeps pining after him. It doesn't work that way. He is enabling this. In the process, he is treating her like crap in general. It's all right there.
I've known, dealt with, befriended, and dated so many people just like that guy. He's the poster child for jerks around the world.
Alright, I watched it again as well. 5:20 is the point we're arguing. Why does he dodge the question? Because he knows what he's doing. Jerks aren't stupid. They just don't want anyone else to know what they're doing. Seen it time and again. Diversion and avoidance are commonly used tactics.
This doesn't change the fact that this girl is an idiot. Intelligent, my ass. I knew girls like her, as well. Guaranteed low self-esteem, abandonment issues, etc. She's staying WAY longer than is healthy, and that's on her.
The issue isn't whether what he does works - because it does. Jerks have a lot of attractive traits about them. Everyone knows that. But, you don't have to be like this guy to be successful. Not at all.
This doesn't change the fact that this girl is an idiot. Intelligent, my ass. I knew girls like her, as well. Guaranteed low self-esteem, abandonment issues, etc. She's staying WAY longer than is healthy, and that's on her.
The issue isn't whether what he does works - because it does. Jerks have a lot of attractive traits about them. Everyone knows that. But, you don't have to be like this guy to be successful. Not at all.
backbreaker
Master Don Juan
EUREKA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!floydb25 said:
that's exactly right.
and that right there in one sentence, is the all this entire site, is. caring about your damn self.
AFCs aren't so much clueless or stupid or even to an extent chumps as they are just naive. Naive to think that society cares what's in that person's best interest is, and that women in general, want what he wants for himself.
I can say that because that was in one small paragraph my problem for the first 21ish years of my life. really seriously about 23 years is when I really started to truly break lose of the chains of AFCism.
The world is not fvcking fair, nor does it give a **** about your fvcking feelings or what's right or what's wrong. The world just is. It's not that the guy doesn't care about her feelings, he just cares about what he wants more than he cares about her feelings.
DJism, in it's most simplistic form, is putting your needs, your integrity, your wants, your desires, above anyone else's (outside of family and other common sense practical relationships).
The day you figure that out the day it ALL just snaps into place like a 1000 piece puzzle. Yes, what I want is more important than what this girl i have known for 3 months wants. sorry babe. There imght be a day I care about what you want, but today isnt' that day and you will have to stick around longer for me to care, and even then it won't be as much as I care about me.
Whatever it is you want. Has nothing to do with women.
Don't disagree with that, but there's a difference between looking out for yourself, and putting yourself first, and being a selfish jerk who ONLY cares about themselves. That **** doesn't get you anywhere. Yeah, you can have 500 women and all these acquaintances, but you're still going to be lonely. I see it all the time. Womanizers are usually the most depressed people around. The whole "bad" lifestyle is nothing but emptiness. It goes right back to the extremes vs balance issue.
Also agree with accepting reality, and so forth. It's true that most people only care about themselves, so you need to look out for you. Doesn't mean you have to be selfish just like them. You CAN protect yourself without hurting others.
Also agree with accepting reality, and so forth. It's true that most people only care about themselves, so you need to look out for you. Doesn't mean you have to be selfish just like them. You CAN protect yourself without hurting others.
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Atom Smasher
Master Don Juan
Having been on TV many times myself, I know that prior to going on, the producers coach you very aggressively to amplify the character traits that got you on TV in the first place. They have a very sophisticated way of making you aware of those traits, and the "urgent need" to focus on bringing those traits out "for the benefit of the audience". After all these years of this kind of Television, they have it down to an absolute science.
Believe me, they were both coached thoroughly. They told the guy to be a complete a$$hole, and the girl was coached to bring out end express "just how she feels". The whole thing is contrived and amplified because in that industry, eliciting raw emotion from the viewer is do or die.
Not that there aren't lessons to be learned here... He does convey the "I'm first" attitude that seems to be absolutely necessary when dealing with today's women. This is the "do or die" condition that we men find ourselves in due to the reality of the media brainwashing of women en masse.
Believe me, they were both coached thoroughly. They told the guy to be a complete a$$hole, and the girl was coached to bring out end express "just how she feels". The whole thing is contrived and amplified because in that industry, eliciting raw emotion from the viewer is do or die.
Not that there aren't lessons to be learned here... He does convey the "I'm first" attitude that seems to be absolutely necessary when dealing with today's women. This is the "do or die" condition that we men find ourselves in due to the reality of the media brainwashing of women en masse.
P
perseverance
Guest
I don't see anything great about this man.
I certainly wouldn't aspire to be anything like him.
He says he has slept with around 500 women. I don't believe him. If he has slept with 500 women, what percentage of those women would have been remotely attractive? How many of those women would have had a modicum of intelligence? I'd say it would be a slim minority.
He says he's in the security business, he collects money etc? It seems he has an obsession with the Richardson brothers or the Kray twins. He fancies himself as a bit of a lad, a bit of a Gangster. It all sounds like utter nonsense to me. Walk into any pub up and down Britain and you'll meet one of these men in at least every pub.
He's right though, a man who looks good and a man who can make women laugh and who is socially potent will enjoy successful encounters with a plethora of women. This is no God given secret though is it?
How he treats his fiance is disgusting, he treats women like slaves, he's hardly a person I would want to emulate. She is clearly mentally unstable as Atom Smasher points out. She looks like she has low self-esteem just by the way she carries herself and the way she communicates. She wants a baby and is prepared to have one with a man who treats her like dirt on the bottom of his shoe. She is hardly worth shouting from the roof tops about is she?
One thing I will say about him is at least he is honest throughout the interview. He's an ars*hole and he isn't afraid to show it.
I certainly wouldn't aspire to be anything like him.
He says he has slept with around 500 women. I don't believe him. If he has slept with 500 women, what percentage of those women would have been remotely attractive? How many of those women would have had a modicum of intelligence? I'd say it would be a slim minority.
He says he's in the security business, he collects money etc? It seems he has an obsession with the Richardson brothers or the Kray twins. He fancies himself as a bit of a lad, a bit of a Gangster. It all sounds like utter nonsense to me. Walk into any pub up and down Britain and you'll meet one of these men in at least every pub.
He's right though, a man who looks good and a man who can make women laugh and who is socially potent will enjoy successful encounters with a plethora of women. This is no God given secret though is it?
How he treats his fiance is disgusting, he treats women like slaves, he's hardly a person I would want to emulate. She is clearly mentally unstable as Atom Smasher points out. She looks like she has low self-esteem just by the way she carries herself and the way she communicates. She wants a baby and is prepared to have one with a man who treats her like dirt on the bottom of his shoe. She is hardly worth shouting from the roof tops about is she?
One thing I will say about him is at least he is honest throughout the interview. He's an ars*hole and he isn't afraid to show it.
dutchmaster
Senior Don Juan
This is why I love this site. Lots of great reads there, now I actually realize what kind of a person he is. Poster child for a jerk sounds like a perfect label
R
Rubato
Guest
This guy is an idiot.
As Atom Smasher and others said he has a great deal of projected confidence. I'm very skeptical that he's actually a confident guy. If he was wholly secure in himself, he wouldn't be such a scumbag.
It's obvious from watching this guy that he is NOT a DJ but rather some pompous guy who has about as much respect for the rest of the world as he does himself - almost zero. He doesn't take care of himself. He's let his body go. He doesn't dress well. And while a lot of this may be staged, the reaction he gets from the woman is still telling anyways. I believe Pook was right when he said that women are like magic machines that reflect back to us what we put in to them. And this guy puts nothing good in his women. Since he has such a low opinion of himself, it shouldn't be very hard for him to develop a low opinion of others. He's probably not feigning his low thoughts of women and the rest of the world through the way he treats that girl. And it's simply a reflection of how he thinks of himself.
It seems there are at least 2 camps on this website as far as what defines a proper DJ. This is obviously my opinion, but I would say the people who leave the following out of their definition of a DJ are wrong:
A DJ is a powerful man who respects the people who exerts power over.
DJ's are confident, they may make people laugh, they may be entertaining. They are always confident.
They have an paralleled level of self determination that arises from the fact that they know they have a plan and are wholly comfortable that as the author or progenitor of the plan, they are able to execute it in a fully trustworthy manner.
This man has only one DJ TRAIT - confidence.
To backbreakers point, there is a difference between caring about yourself and placing your needs to the priority of other's needs who have not given you a good reason to do otherwise and treating people poorly. This man treats people poorly. DJ's do not treat people with a greater level of respect than they have earned, act AFC and try and bribe women with fake respect, supplicating behavior, or gifts, or place an undeserving person's interests ahead of their own. However, and I think this is really important:
DJ's like people, especially women. And since they like people and are DJ's, they understand the masculine "king" component of their manhood.
Some guys hate women. Some guys on this board hate women. Some guys just don't like people in general. And it really makes me wonder why people who hate either women or people in general spend their time on a discussion forum about social dynamics. Why? If you hate women, either start living as a homosexual or become asexual.
As Atom Smasher and others said he has a great deal of projected confidence. I'm very skeptical that he's actually a confident guy. If he was wholly secure in himself, he wouldn't be such a scumbag.
It's obvious from watching this guy that he is NOT a DJ but rather some pompous guy who has about as much respect for the rest of the world as he does himself - almost zero. He doesn't take care of himself. He's let his body go. He doesn't dress well. And while a lot of this may be staged, the reaction he gets from the woman is still telling anyways. I believe Pook was right when he said that women are like magic machines that reflect back to us what we put in to them. And this guy puts nothing good in his women. Since he has such a low opinion of himself, it shouldn't be very hard for him to develop a low opinion of others. He's probably not feigning his low thoughts of women and the rest of the world through the way he treats that girl. And it's simply a reflection of how he thinks of himself.
It seems there are at least 2 camps on this website as far as what defines a proper DJ. This is obviously my opinion, but I would say the people who leave the following out of their definition of a DJ are wrong:
A DJ is a powerful man who respects the people who exerts power over.
DJ's are confident, they may make people laugh, they may be entertaining. They are always confident.
They have an paralleled level of self determination that arises from the fact that they know they have a plan and are wholly comfortable that as the author or progenitor of the plan, they are able to execute it in a fully trustworthy manner.
This man has only one DJ TRAIT - confidence.
To backbreakers point, there is a difference between caring about yourself and placing your needs to the priority of other's needs who have not given you a good reason to do otherwise and treating people poorly. This man treats people poorly. DJ's do not treat people with a greater level of respect than they have earned, act AFC and try and bribe women with fake respect, supplicating behavior, or gifts, or place an undeserving person's interests ahead of their own. However, and I think this is really important:
DJ's like people, especially women. And since they like people and are DJ's, they understand the masculine "king" component of their manhood.
Some guys hate women. Some guys on this board hate women. Some guys just don't like people in general. And it really makes me wonder why people who hate either women or people in general spend their time on a discussion forum about social dynamics. Why? If you hate women, either start living as a homosexual or become asexual.
Rubato: On the very last point you made... I think people only hate women because they aren't successful with them; don't know how to attract or keep them. They wouldn't be hating if they didn't care. A lot of this failure, bitterness, etc results in people coming to sites like these. Of course, the lingering hatred is still there, and it shows in certain posts, but deep down they still love women. They just hate that she left / cheated / whatever, and are now trying to attract women. That's why every anti-woman thread also has a "so, how do I attract them..." theme embedded in them.
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.