"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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A totally weird / different question

evolvingnerd

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hi fellas
now my best friend has recently gotten into a relationship, looking to be LTR sortta stuff, (i personally think he rushed into things)

but anyway, this girl seems right for him, and i'd like things to go well for him
now, i've had a few msn convos with her, and at the start she was all happy to talkt o me, but now things have been a little "bland" and kinda akward (on msn...seen her in ages)
now i'm not sure what it is i'm doing...i was considering practicing some Dj techniques on her, and acting somewhat ****y + funny, but i think i screwed it over, probably being far too ****y
she seems like an insecure girl, and i usually find that she asks me "do you think we're suited together" or somethin of the sort

i was wondeirng if you could offer me some advice
i do'nt want things to become awkard, and possibly face my best friend facing some trouble
what are some convo tips / intros/ techniques/ anything i can use to make things a little easier
keep in mind she's pretty insecure (IMO)

cheers
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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mystic03

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now my best friend has recently gotten into a relationship, looking to be LTR sortta stuff, (i personally think he rushed into things)
Right there at the end you are saying your initial opinion, are you sure that when you talk to her you didn't tell her that,,,??
 

CLOONEY

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Practice being cokcy and funny on MSN? WTF, get off your computer and actually find a girl in the mall, in a bar, in a club, in a sporting team, even on the street and do it in person!!! Man, you are sad!
 

Gold Heart

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I might have understood you, but it seems you are doing quite a few things wrong

Your post wasn't very clear to me. Let me clarify two things:

1. You are practicing DJ techniques on your best friend's girlfriend? And you want us to provide you advice on how to push your game on her? If you two were "best friends" you would not be practicing DJ techniques on her. Not a respectable thing to do.

2. You don't practice DJ techniques online. It's a good way to get the feel of it, yes, but it seems as if you are trying to find alternatives to going outside and finding your own share of women. Go chill with some single people you know, and tell them to bring friends. Practice on THEM.

3. Your mindstate is wrong. You don't ACT ****y/funny. You ARE ****y/funny. What's even worse is that you said you would "act somewhat ****y + funny." And you said you may have been too ****y. It might have even come off as plain conceited. You don't want that. ****y and funny is more of a joke thing. The effect is that she has to think "I can't believe he said that! Is he being serious, or is he just joking?" If your response is ever "That's conceited" or something similar, then you said it in the wrong tone or phrased it wrong. All about the delivery, my friend.

She is probably not as insecure as you think. You made have just made her uncomfortable. When she says "do you think we're suited together," is she talking you and her or your friend and her? If it's the first, tell your buddy to dump her and go hit a club up.

Hope that helped.
 

evolvingnerd

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i'm not tryin to hit on her or anything like that
but it just seems that i come off as too ****y/conceited to most girls (in real life also :O)

and as for real life, i'm a gonna take a dive into the uni lecture crowd today
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

DJ_Dork

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You seem to be in a rush to hook up with a girl. Reassess what you're doing and take care of your life first.
 

evolvingnerd

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DJ_Dork:
very true
i have no female friends, and am currently looking to work on finding some
but i think now that i've got this knowledge, i'm still inequpped to use it properly
 
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