"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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A thread for those that get depressed this time of year

Special T

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I'm not depressed, just pissed at myself that I don't have a woman in my life. All the women I met and/or been with this year, none ever considered me a BF.

I vow to have a GF in 2010. The last GF I had was when I was a teenager. Since then I've had nothing but flings and short-term relationships.

Share your story about why you're not happy.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Julius_Seizeher

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This is not what SS is about. You are missing the point.
 

Jitterbug

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It's not too late to write a Dear Santa letter. You might wake up tomorrow with a brand new GF.
 

Lexington

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Special T said:
I'm not depressed, just pissed at myself that I don't have a woman in my life. All the women I met and/or been with this year, none ever considered me a BF.

I vow to have a GF in 2010. The last GF I had was when I was a teenager. Since then I've had nothing but flings and short-term relationships.

Share your story about why you're not happy.
Be cautious my friend. To me, this post reeks of desperation, which is a very stinky cologne. I've been there before. I've been keeping a journal for a while. And for months, I would just b*tch about how it sucks not to have a woman in my life.

I couldn't see it then, but when I look back at those journal entries now, I am amazed by the irony. The fact that I wanted a woman so desperately was the very thing preventing me from getting one! I looked at all the dudes I saw succeeding with women, and I cursed the world. Why the hell were all these guys getting chicks while I was making love to my right hand every night? What the hell was wrong with me?

In order to succeed with women, the key is caring LESS. That seems counter-intuitive, doesn't it? But the truth is, when you don't give a rip, it's easier to succeed with the ladies. Just go out there and have fun. Talk to every girl you meet. Flirt with them and socialize with them. Just don't focus on the results.

If you have this attitude, you'll have lots of women in your life. You won't be banging every one of them, but you will begin to internalize a true abundance mentality. And odds are, you will succeed with at least one of these women.
 

horaholic

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Read some Tolle, bro.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Merry Christmas to all. remember that the best gift we have is Jesus' gift of eternal life. if you believe and accept him as Lord then you can always count on him to be happy.

but on topic of course, i got depressed cuz i chose the wrong girl at this one party. instead of having the balls and closing a better prospect for a girlfriend a one that actually liked me, i got with one that was easier and didn't like me

Lexington said:
In order to succeed with women, the key is caring LESS. That seems counter-intuitive, doesn't it? But the truth is, when you don't give a rip, it's easier to succeed with the ladies. Just go out there and have fun. Talk to every girl you meet. Flirt with them and socialize with them. Just don't focus on the results.

If you have this attitude, you'll have lots of women in your life. You won't be banging every one of them, but you will begin to internalize a true abundance mentality. And odds are, you will succeed with at least one of these women.
you have to be carefree and adaptable not necessarily careless. i have this problem of not caring at all and it's not good
 

Special T

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I know it's not healthy to fixate on not being in a relationship, but this time of year always get to me.
 

jacob

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The 'Theology of the Body' is Pope John Paul II's integrated vision of the human person - body, soul, and spirit. As he explains, the physical human body has a specific meaning and is capable of revealing answers regarding fundamental questions about us and our lives:

Is there a real purpose to life and if so, what is it?

Why were we created male and female? Does it really matter if we are one sex or another?

Why were man and woman called to communion from the beginning? What does the marital union of a man and woman say to us about God and his plan for our lives?

What is the purpose of the married and celibate vocations?

What exactly is "Love"?

Is it truly possible to be pure of heart?

http://www.theologyofthebody.net/

Give this link a read. It speaks the truth about us as human beings. We're all hypnotized into this "hook up" culture that we get depresssed because we don't know why we were actually created.

And here's the documents from Pope John Paul II wednesday audiences that he actually gave.

http://www.ewtn.com/library/PAPALDOC/JP2TBIND.HTM

Try and give it a read before you prejudge it.

I hope this helps
Merry Christmas, bro!
 

WaterTiger

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Special T said:
I'm not depressed, just pissed at myself that I don't have a woman in my life. All the women I met and/or been with this year, none ever considered me a BF.
ON THE UP SIDE...!!!!!

*You don't have to buy an overly priced Christmas gift for her.

*You don't have to deal with her fake smile when you get her the wrong color of whatever you bought her.

*You don't have to pretend to be happy with a worthless piece of crap she got you! (That cost $5.99 in comparison to the $75.00 gift you got her!)

*None of that "Christmas-Eve-at-My-Mom's-Christmas-Day-At-Yours" silliness

*No awkward meals with her family you bearly know. (You know, the one where her Granny asks if she's on birth control)

*No awkward meals with YOUR family. (When your Mom busts out pictures of you running naked, age 3, through the neighbor's corn field.)

*You don't have to miss an awsome New Year's party because she's "uncomfortable" with your guy friend's new girl.

Your New Year's resolution should be to have two girlfriends at the same time.
 

Lexington

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fearless_surrender said:
Merry Christmas to all. remember that the best gift we have is Jesus' gift of eternal life. if you believe and accept him as Lord then you can always count on him to be happy.

but on topic of course, i got depressed cuz i chose the wrong girl at this one party. instead of having the balls and closing a better prospect for a girlfriend a one that actually liked me, i got with one that was easier and didn't like me



you have to be carefree and adaptable not necessarily careless. i have this problem of not caring at all and it's not good
Perhaps my wording was off. I didn't mean to say don't give a crap about anything. I agree with you.

You should want to succeed, but at the same time you shouldn't be fretting about the result. Just got out there and give it your best shot and know that you can probably deal with whatever happens. "Carefree" is a good word.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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r0cky

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Special T said:
I'm not depressed, just pissed at myself that I don't have a woman in my life. All the women I met and/or been with this year, none ever considered me a BF.

I vow to have a GF in 2010. The last GF I had was when I was a teenager. Since then I've had nothing but flings and short-term relationships.

Share your story about why you're not happy.
*plays the violin*
New year resolutions never work. I bet this is not the first time you've wished for a gf.
Promising and talking to yourself will never accomplish anything. Live positive and you will get what you want, living in negativity will only get you more of what you don't want.
 
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