A text out of anger. Opinions pls

[DonJuanit0]

Backstory, she is an ex of mine, recently started talking again, I was a bit afc back then so I broke up with her cause I found myself going very low. She recently broke up also. I am studying abroad so I am back home for 2 weeks now and we met 2 times although she said see wants to see me more often. She's been finding excuses to avoid it though, most common "I was working, I am very tired".

I do know that if I wanted to see someone, I would, no matter how tired I was, and in her case, she can't be ALL that tired every time. She is a waitress!! (don't even start saying it's a right excuse, it isn't)

Anyway she once again avoided meeting tonight and I went a bit nuts so I texted her:

"Basically, when you finish work you can come over and just sleep, I won't make you any more tired. If you don't want to, just because things are not as they used to be, when your batteries are full and you want something different than just to stay with me, message me! I don't see the point in talking all the time! Why am I being such a douche? Because other people get angry as well, not just you, learn this! And it's not because you can't make it today, cause that's what you would reply, that I make it a big deal! The thing is that you talked so much and said so many things and what you do these days is lame"

I am probably throwing my chances away but I can't afford to care anymore. If she doesn't come I'm gonna give up on her and focus on other plates.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

Didn't understand your text 100%, but I think I got the meaning of it.

You were right about the tired excuse. I was recently dating a waitress and it was great because I'd just go over there late and bang her out, she would even leave her door open (which was stupid, and I told her so), if I wanted to get there early and wait for her (which I never did). Anyway, I feel this message could go one of two ways. Either she snaps out of it and sees you're not fvcking around, and starts seeing you more. Or, what I'm leaning towards, she sends you some excuse that it's not going to work out and blah, blah.

The problem with your text is that you are trying to talk to her logically. You are showing her you are more invested than she is. Your text was not an attraction builder. It was the opposite IMO. It did come across as an ultimatum, so, for the fear of losing you, she may concede and start shaping up.....or, she'll just be done with it, realizing that she's not really interested, and that she can't string you along anymore.

You said she was an ex, that means she may just be testing the waters out.... but not ready to jump in.

 

[DonJuanit0]

Didn't understand your text 100%, but I think I got the meaning of it.

You were right about the tired excuse. I was recently dating a waitress and it was great because I'd just go over there late and bang her out, she would even leave her door open (which was stupid, and I told her so), if I wanted to get there early and wait for her (which I never did). Anyway, I feel this message could go one of two ways. Either she snaps out of it and sees you're not fvcking around, and starts seeing you more. Or, what I'm leaning towards, she sends you some excuse that it's not going to work out and blah, blah.

The problem with your text is that you are trying to talk to her logically. You are showing her you are more invested than she is. Your text was not an attraction builder. It was the opposite IMO. It did come across as an ultimatum, so, for the fear of losing you, she may concede and start shaping up.....or, she'll just be done with it, realizing that she's not really interested, and that she can't string you along anymore.

You said she was an ex, that means she may just be testing the waters out.... but not ready to jump in.

Sorry for not being able to translate it to perfect English but it's written in another language! You said exactly what I wanted her to think, she either concedes or be gone! I'm tired and I don't mean physically! Funny fact, she hasn't "seen" the message for like an hour! She probably doesn't open it. I can imagine an excuse like "I saw it when I got home". F U C K that ****.

 

[Cheeks]

Low interest. You're an ex, you're old news.

I'm not gonna say its impossible to win an ex over, I've done it. But ultimately it's not worth it. The truth is they resent you for being so devoid of options that you went back to her.

 

[DonJuanit0]

Low interest. You're an ex, you're old news.

I'm not gonna say its impossible to win an ex over, I've done it. But ultimately it's not worth it. The truth is they resent you for being so devoid of options that you went back to her.

I actually went back to her while I am in one of my most productive periods of my life when it comes to spinning plates. She was my kryptonite and again now, couldn't resist when she started texting me again! I agree with you it is probably not worth it and I wouldn't have done it with any other ex.

 

[DonJuanit0]

Her reply (an hour later):

"I just saw the message, my battery run off! You didn't understand, it's not about sex. It's just that sometimes you don't want to understand me and complain for no reason. We will talk tomorrow cause I am sleeping as I am typing :*"

She even used a kiss smiley lol! Like she didn't even care about what I said! I mean, WHAT THE ****ING ****?

That confused me! So, I just told her that if she doesn't come she can only text me when she wants sex and I get a reply saying that she doesn't care about sex but she wants to see me and I complain for no reason! Kiss!

Is she a player ? Am I stupid?

I know that tomorrow she will send me a message like nothing happened and she will actually meet me if I want to! I am 100% sure! If I see her, she will understand I am soft again and she can walk all over me, if I don't it's gonna hurt!

Damn you so suave for learning me those staff!

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

Her reply (an hour later):

"I just saw the message, my battery run off! You didn't understand, it's not about sex. It's just that sometimes you don't want to understand me and complain for no reason. We will talk tomorrow cause I am sleeping as I am typing :*"

She even used a kiss smiley lol! Like she didn't even care about what I said! I mean, WHAT THE ****ING ****?

That confused me! So, I just told her that if she doesn't come she can only text me when she wants sex and I get a reply saying that she doesn't care about sex but she wants to see me and I complain for no reason! Kiss!

Is she a player ? Am I stupid?

I know that tomorrow she will send me a message like nothing happened and she will actually meet me if I want to! I am 100% sure! If I see her, she will understand I am soft again and she can walk all over me, if I don't it's gonna hurt!

Damn you so suave for learning me those staff!

eehhh, you're sucked in man....and you're acting like a guy without options.

She even used a kiss smiley lol! Like she didn't even care about what I said! I mean, WHAT THE ****ING ****?

That confused me!

She doesn't have to explain herself or answer your questions. It doesn't matter..... she's got you by the balls.

We will talk tomorrow cause I am sleeping as I am typing :*"

You responded to this? I feel your best move would have been not to respond, and not respond tomorrow either. Right now, it's all on her terms. The power is hers my man. You know it, and she knows it. This is where good ol NC comes in. You're too emotionally invested, and she's treating you like an orbiter it seems. If you don't want to do NC, then figure something else out, otherwise this $hit's going to tear you up. Next thing you know you're not making plans with other plates with the slight chance that your ex might want to hang out. Slippery slope....

 

[DonJuanit0]

You responded to this? I feel your best move would have been not to respond, and not respond tomorrow either. Right now, it's all on her terms. The power is hers my man. You know it, and she knows it. This is where good ol NC comes in. You're too emotionally invested, and she's treating you like an orbiter it seems. If you don't want to do NC, then figure something else out, otherwise this $hit's going to tear you up. Next thing you know you're not making plans with other plates with the slight chance that your ex might want to hang out. Slippery slope....

I didn't say anything! The thing is, I know about these staff! I really do, so well! I am trying to regain some power here, I never text her first, she always does. I wouldn't text her tomorrow either! She will send me something like, "How are you?"

She is not using me as an orbiter, she thinks we are in a LTR for some reason as she has stated to which I didn't reply. I know judge by moves and not words.

Could you like, tell me, how do I gain my power back?

The situation is this:

We broke up 2 years ago, we were together for 1.5 year and I started acting AFC so I broke up with her cause I was feeling so low.
She texted me again asking for forgiveness that she wasn't so nice to me (her mother was in prison (that's definitely true) and she couldn't be in the best mood for anything or so she did say back then)
Back to now:
I never text first, we met 2 times, in the past 2 weeks, both times she asked for it.
I never call her names (good ones, don't know how to say it in English) she calls me baby and staff.
She knows I talk with other women but doesn't act on it. (I know she is getting jealous sometimes)
I am mentally ****ed up with her!

 

[TheSlasher]

Don't talk to her until you've regain yourself. No matter how long it takes.