A Storm Is Coming....

[jackson37]

-Ex breaks up with me for depression
-She has new bf, I have new gf
-We stay in contact
-Last time I see her she tells me in August we will get back together if I want, I say ok cause still have feelings and i have a girl to be with until then
-Find out through mutual friend she's staying with new guy
-Know she will approach and tell me

My Question: How should I react when she approaches and tells me about this?

1) Call her out on her bullsh!t**
2) Respond politely, and play it off like I don't care.
3) Dont respond to it at all

**Her Bullsh!t: She was texting new guy constantly WHILE we were together, breaks up with me, starts dating him, strings me along all year with excuses as to why she's with him regardless of the depression and with idea of getting back together. I feel like Option #2 is correct but choosing this will force me to internalize these angry feelings and I also WANT her to realize what she did because she's oblivious so she'll go on thinking she did nothing wrong.




....I know I got played real hard. She's my first love though and honestly if she wanted to get back together (maybe I'm too forgiving and weak right now) but I would despite all the bs.

Please :trouble: the beta out of me. I feel so weak and used but I want to get past this and get stronger.

Please

 

[BetterCallSaul]

Before I offer any input, I want to know why you don't stand up for yourself. For a moment i thought I clicked the high school forum.

 

[abe0]

I do not see what the issue is.....I get rid of people like that and never deal with them again. If you want to tell her she is a lying b*tch and makes you feel better ...great. I just move on never to see or respond to any of their text.....let them keep wondering what went wrong and why they got dumped. I do not give them the satisfaction to let them know they pissed me off.....Abe

 

[ArcBound]

"-Last time I see her she tells me in August we will get back together if I want, I say ok cause still have feelings and i have a girl to be with until then"

You are a plate of hers, and she was just keeping her options open. Women always say stuff like this, and men believing her, wait with hope and anticipation.

It allows the man to stay somewhat attached to her, while she constantly evaluates her options. For whatever reason, she decided that the man she is with, is who she wants to stay with instead of you.

"and I also WANT her to realize what she did because she's oblivious so she'll go on thinking she did nothing wrong."

Doesn't matter. You want closure like a pu$$y b!tch and you will never get closure out of a woman. Any sort of argument, however logical, any sort of anger, however justified will only convince her further that she made the right decision in abandoning the chump that is you. I want you to imprint that into your head.

Do number 2/3 and stop thinking about her in the meanwhile. Your revenge/justice fantasies will never come true, ever. Move on with your life, and try to make your relationships with future girls better, you know, like the girlfriend you have right now.

 

[hudpes]

There is no way "forgiving" works. People are a certain way and she apparently thinks pulling sh*t like that is clever. You would forgive her for her little field trip, exploring another ****? Well I'm sure she learned her lesson and boy is she sorry she hurt you. Look, even if by some miracle of quantum physics it was physically possible for a woman like that to truly regret it, you should never take her back. First of all, because if she did it once, she will likely do it again, second, the relationship will play the same cute tune on a piano out of tune. You will recognize the tune immediately, but it will irritate you. The solution is to simply go on, and of course never even think of getting together with her - she's on your ignore list now. You shouldn't stop what you feel inside you, anger, love, despair.. let it flow and let it out, but don't act on it.

 

[pbsurf]

-Ex breaks up with me for depression
-She has new bf, I have new gf
-We stay in contact
-Last time I see her she tells me in August we will get back together if I want, I say ok cause still have feelings and i have a girl to be with until then
-Find out through mutual friend she's staying with new guy
-Know she will approach and tell me

My Question: How should I react when she approaches and tells me about this?

1) Call her out on her bullsh!t**
2) Respond politely, and play it off like I don't care.
3) Dont respond to it at all

**Her Bullsh!t: She was texting new guy constantly WHILE we were together, breaks up with me, starts dating him, strings me along all year with excuses as to why she's with him regardless of the depression and with idea of getting back together. I feel like Option #2 is correct but choosing this will force me to internalize these angry feelings and I also WANT her to realize what she did because she's oblivious so she'll go on thinking she did nothing wrong.




....I know I got played real hard. She's my first love though and honestly if she wanted to get back together (maybe I'm too forgiving and weak right now) but I would despite all the bs.

Please :trouble: the beta out of me. I feel so weak and used but I want to get past this and get stronger.

Please

dude - i am somewhat in your shoes right now and it sucks. Every time you ignore her your power will grow. It will be tempting but delete all texts and chive on...

 

[VladPatton]

You walk away from this bullshıt situation and keep banging your current chick. Never go back to a girl, especially if she dumped you. Stop letting her call the shots in your life.

 

[The LadyKiller]

Like the others have said, ignore her bulls*** and carry on. If you are confronted by her, be respectful and then continue moving on. I have some real sticking points with women, but walking away from a girl who leaves me is something I've become real good at. They made a mistake by personally saying (but not actually saying) she is better than you. By living well and moving on - as you've done - you're proving her wrong.

 

[backbreaker]

Comes a rainstorm, put your rubbers on your feet, Comes a snowstorm, you can get a little heat, Comes love, nothing can be done

 

[Thorninmyside]

Remind yourself that in your hour of need, she looks after #1.

Closure comes from within. She can't give that to you and you can't apply logic to an illogical person. If it makes you feel better, tell her that if she wants you back she get get on her knees and suck you. When she's done, zip up, tell her you're just not feeling it, and walk away.

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

Last time I see her she tells me in August we will get back together if I want, I say ok cause still have feelings and i have a girl to be with until then

Pfft. Just go with the new girl and stay.... this other one could be on again for August, but what about September? One month on one month off?

She wants to feel safe knowing you don't think she's easy/evil by f*cking some guy while she's 'your girlfriend'. It's BS man. Next.

 

[jackson37]

Thanks everyone for all the tough love and kind advice. I guess I knew what I had to do but I knew it was going to be hard. I shouldn't have even stayed in contact with her after she dated that dude..

We were actually mid convo (through Facebook) like 1-2 messages every couple days and I stopped replying after posting this. Now that my eyes are open to her keeping me as one of her plates I won't feed into it any longer. I'm angry but you guys are right I need to find closure within myself.

If she texts my Mobile phone I will reply politely and leave it, otherwise I am done talking with her completely.


I will update this thread in august for those who care to know how things turned out. Maybe she won't even bring it up since I stopped replying.

Whenever I need strength to continue doing this I will re read this thread. Thanks so much guys


Cheers,
Jack