Hey guys its been a awhile since I posted on these forums. I came on to ask a simple question.
Here goes
How do I make some new friends in College?
Im 19, and a sophmore in College (commuter college with no dorms), Ive made two new friends since the start of school, I call them friends because they asked me to hangout with them.
Now in college I have clubs, and there about three clubs that meet everyday, and every other club meets about once every month not even, so nobody even shows up. Most of the clubs existence is almost a Beauracratic joke.
These three clubs are all ethnic, which I dont have a problem with, but for some reason I havent made any friends from there. Maybe It has to do with me, it probably does.
Ive made two new friends like I mentioned above, but there both nerds, all they do is play video games and dont have much going for themselves, there home bodies most of the time and they just go watch movies on the weekends and thats it. They have no intrest in girls and there life is in disarray.
Whats surprising is that I GET ALONG with them. I enjoy their company like hell, and there fun and I have a great time with them. But I Know there not "cool" or DJ. There is nothing wrong with the fact that I get along with them but I need confident masculine men who are in charge of their life, to hang out with me.
Now the College class, almost everybody, they come into class and they get up and leave after class is done, so logistically its difficult to screen people, sure you can start a conversation, which will last for 2 min,then ends since the teacher started teaching. I suppose you can talk to them every class and build rapport that way, but its very difficult since you dont have those 10 min to see if the person is "cool" or not.
In the College gym, I unfortunatly dont know Basketball or any sport for me to even play a pickup game, so it becomes difficult to make friends there.
I feel like talking to most people feels like work and very few people are actually fun to talk to and are enjoyable. My friends tend to be intellectuals and these two guys I met, it feels like the conversation isnt forced and that it all comes natural.
Most people I talk to, it feels forced and it doesnt feel like it flows. I dont want it to feel like Im a politician. The problem is that my convo never flows with "high status" males. Thats those who have all the qualties which Im looking for in my friends.
So now I have two things going against me, the sitauation such as my college which doesnt offer much oppurtunity in the first place and secondly that Im not the type of person that gels easily with that certain type of person.
I might even have an answer to my problems, I think that If I was more confident about myself, people become easier to deal with. The more satisfied I become about my life, the easier it is to become friendly.
The main problem I want to solve is that I dont get out much, and making friends will help me expose me more.
I live in NYC for god sakes, some of my nights have been great. Such as coming home at 5 in the morning. The night would start with my friend picking me up at 8 then going to a club, drinking and just being around tons of people, since he is part of a frat. There so many interesting people to meet. After the club we would hit up a Hookah bar and eat the nicest foods. hehe. After that its back to the frat house in Wall Street with more drinks and drink games like beer pong. The only thing missing would be a girl lol. Lol but Ive had some great nights in the city. Its an amazing place, there's so many things going on.
But my key to these great nights are people, which I need to get to know since I need them to show me this world. Which brings me back to my first question inadvertently.
Or more importantly, what do I need to do?
Here goes
How do I make some new friends in College?
Im 19, and a sophmore in College (commuter college with no dorms), Ive made two new friends since the start of school, I call them friends because they asked me to hangout with them.
Now in college I have clubs, and there about three clubs that meet everyday, and every other club meets about once every month not even, so nobody even shows up. Most of the clubs existence is almost a Beauracratic joke.
These three clubs are all ethnic, which I dont have a problem with, but for some reason I havent made any friends from there. Maybe It has to do with me, it probably does.
Ive made two new friends like I mentioned above, but there both nerds, all they do is play video games and dont have much going for themselves, there home bodies most of the time and they just go watch movies on the weekends and thats it. They have no intrest in girls and there life is in disarray.
Whats surprising is that I GET ALONG with them. I enjoy their company like hell, and there fun and I have a great time with them. But I Know there not "cool" or DJ. There is nothing wrong with the fact that I get along with them but I need confident masculine men who are in charge of their life, to hang out with me.
Now the College class, almost everybody, they come into class and they get up and leave after class is done, so logistically its difficult to screen people, sure you can start a conversation, which will last for 2 min,then ends since the teacher started teaching. I suppose you can talk to them every class and build rapport that way, but its very difficult since you dont have those 10 min to see if the person is "cool" or not.
In the College gym, I unfortunatly dont know Basketball or any sport for me to even play a pickup game, so it becomes difficult to make friends there.
I feel like talking to most people feels like work and very few people are actually fun to talk to and are enjoyable. My friends tend to be intellectuals and these two guys I met, it feels like the conversation isnt forced and that it all comes natural.
Most people I talk to, it feels forced and it doesnt feel like it flows. I dont want it to feel like Im a politician. The problem is that my convo never flows with "high status" males. Thats those who have all the qualties which Im looking for in my friends.
So now I have two things going against me, the sitauation such as my college which doesnt offer much oppurtunity in the first place and secondly that Im not the type of person that gels easily with that certain type of person.
I might even have an answer to my problems, I think that If I was more confident about myself, people become easier to deal with. The more satisfied I become about my life, the easier it is to become friendly.
The main problem I want to solve is that I dont get out much, and making friends will help me expose me more.
I live in NYC for god sakes, some of my nights have been great. Such as coming home at 5 in the morning. The night would start with my friend picking me up at 8 then going to a club, drinking and just being around tons of people, since he is part of a frat. There so many interesting people to meet. After the club we would hit up a Hookah bar and eat the nicest foods. hehe. After that its back to the frat house in Wall Street with more drinks and drink games like beer pong. The only thing missing would be a girl lol. Lol but Ive had some great nights in the city. Its an amazing place, there's so many things going on.
But my key to these great nights are people, which I need to get to know since I need them to show me this world. Which brings me back to my first question inadvertently.
Or more importantly, what do I need to do?
:crackup: