A question of marriage for the 41 and single guy

[Naughty Ninja]

I've got to say I'm 41 and having fun. No girlfriend and no plans to get married anytime soon. The thing is with all the stories you hear on this site it sounds like alot of marriages are more trouble than their worth. I come from a decent family, all married, parents, grandparents happily married for many years and I've been told I'm very pessimistic about finding 'someone' to get married and have kids with. (Don't want to be the old dude with the walker trying to tell my young kid to get his a$$ in line!) What advice would you guys say you have towards marriage? And what mistakes do you think you've made if you're divorced? Too quick? Out of being lonely? Family pressure? Woman pressure?


I believe I'm more of a realist than a pessimist when it comes to women these days and "fairytale princess marriage". To me society has changed for the worse. I'm not looking for the virgin mary, but I do not want to settle, or have to wind up with a woman with kids. (Though at my age women's kids are in college already. lol.)

 

[Captain]

I'm not even close to 41, never married, so I can't talk about my personal experiences with marriage. I will say this though: marriage isn't necessarily wrong. "Never get married!" is the same kind of advice as "never have a girlfriend! Relationships are more trouble than they're worth! fvck lots of b!tches!". Time for the truth: marriages and relationships are ONLY trouble IF YOU LET THEM BE. Why's that? Because you have the power to walk away any time, whether it be by going out with friends and having a good time while she realizes she made a mistake by fvcking you around, or whether it be by divorce because she did something heinous. YOU ARE #1 in every relationship.

 

[SteR]

Personally I still believe in marriage. I think it'd be better for me to find someone decent to settle down with than constantly jump between women but I do believe it's dependant on finding a 'decent' woman - that's the hard part!

 

[Warrior74]

If I could have companionship without the state sponsered wealth transfer plan (ie marriage) I'd be all for cohabitation.

I think we need an alternative to marriage in this country. A cohabitation agreement that expires after a certian number of years. Marriage is currently a contract between two parties and the government, with the richer party agreeing to finance the poorer party in the event of children or excessive lifestyle. What does the richer party get in exchange? Not much.

So let's have another contract that says, We like each other, we want to spend 5 years together with the option to renew, and we do not own each other or each others' property and have no claim on the their wealth.

I have yet to met a woman who would go for that. To them, there is no benefit for security in that arrangement. So I guess your only option is to find the best woman you can if you are ready to get out of the game.

 

[vatoloco]

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showpost.php?p=1707615&postcount=5

I don't plan on ever getting married if I can help it. Usually men are on the short end of the stick when things go south.

So my plan is to find me a woman who is good looking, is okay with only cohabiting, renounces claims to my property, wants to have kids and has good character & values.

Sh!t. I'm fvcked.

 

[Naughty Ninja]

@ Warrior. Not ready to get out of the game anytime soon! lol.

Just sometimes wondering if I'm kindof f'd with my kindof thinking..