a question from a newbie...any tips helpful

[Jizzee]

hey! this is my first post! I was out at the weekend with a good friend of mine and he had just broken up with his girlfriend. anyways, when we were chatting, we started talking about life and all that and he disagreed with something I had said and it kinda put me on the defensive. half-way through this chat, a girl turned around and started asking us "where the good clubs were?" so my friend started chatting to her. he has immense game, never met anyone who has came close to his game. the girl he was chatting to was very pretty, not my type tho cos she was trying to hard to be paris hilton and i find that a HUGE turn-off lol her friend was very average-looking and i wasnt attracted to her at all. I couldnt think of anything to say to the girl while my friend chatted. They were from Scotland, and for anyone who doesnt know the scottish accent, its pretty thick and dense and we couldnt understand what the girls were saying. My friend said jokingly that "your voice reminds him of shrek" which made both of them laugh. after 5-10 minutes, my friend left to get a drink, and i was left with the 2 girls. I had asked the girl i was chatting to what she did for a living? and i asked the paris-hilton lookalike if she enjoys her job? and she said sumthing which i couldnt understand (cos we were in a noisy bar and her accent) so I jokingly said that "it is a bit like talking to shrek" with a joking smile on my face. She flipped and screamed "i've just bought you a drink, fu** off" and she aggressivly pushed my head and stormed off. I replied with "fu** you, I never asked you to, have it back then!!" anyways, my friend asked me what happened and i told him and i went to apologise to the girl who was chatting to another mate, and she just said "f*** off" to me again, and i just turned away and ignored her. a minute later she came over to me and said she was sorry for arguing and all that, and i apologised as well, and everything was fine.

long rant i know lol

Thing is, I have a stammer, sumtimes its fine, sumtimes when I know I'm gonna stammer, i go very quiet. I can go to speech therapy which, with practice, will enable me to speak fine, albeit slowly. But I dont go, and I dont know why I have this motivational problem.

I just want to know if anyone thinks what i said was out of line (the shrek thing)? i am just starting to use a bit of c+f cos I am usually a shy guy and, due to my stammer, i feel like i dont have a lot of social experience with talking and being funny. I have always been the type of guy who can make little small talk with people, but I always feel as though people are just being polite to me because of my stammer. also, what could have been a better thing to say?
I really want to improve this part of my life, as I feel its severly lacking. I know I have to "do" it, so that I wont regret it when i'm 65 and not able to get it up LOL

thanks for your time

Dave

 

[Interceptor]

WOmen are women. Not Godesses.
Treat them like real people, not some Idealized IMage of the Pefect Woman.
There is no such thing.
So that leaves us with what?
Some chicks who just want to go out and have fun.
You don't owe her anything but some respect, and courtesy.
These are just some chicks out to have a good time. They are not necessarily the most amazing women in the entire world. They're just some chicks you met. It's good to experiment to see which approachjes work on different types of women. Sometimes a C+F comment is good, a Neg hit is good, a DQ is good. Sometimes they are very bad, and awkward. Only you can teach yoursefl how to cold read women you meet.
I will telele you that the more you spend time with them the easier it is to use these types of techniques.
Although I have to say from my point of view, some of these things really should come out of a Natural and Strong Inner Game. Techniques shoudl not be "techniques". They really shoudl just be a part of your personality and the way you interact with women.
C+F usually work best with women with high self esteem, women whom are used to being appeased, and favored and supplicated to.
I wouldn't have done what you did, but you did what came naturally to you.
Did you get a good reaction from it?
DId it build attraction?
DId you see signs that all of a sudden she was more interested in you?

What you did showed her that you were not impressed by her.
What you did showed her that you were not imtimidated by her.
What you did showed her that you are not as socially awkward as a lot of other guys.

Don't worry too much about some chicks you'll never see again.

But do try to look back and see what you think you can do to Build Attraction.
Don't worry about jumping through her hoops.We don't do this.
DOn't worry about qualifying for her. We already know we do.
Don't worry if you have different opinions and viewpoints than hers. It's supposed to be that way. And she doesn't really care about those things that much. She cares about the underlying theme. "Are you confident enough in yourself and in your views and opinions?"
Some chicks will test you like this:

Woman: "What do you think about so and so?"
Supplicating AFC: "Shoot! I think they're awesome!!
Woman: "Oh really? I hate them. And I think they're stupid." (with a disgusted look)
Supplicating AFC: "Um....yeah, you're right. They're stupid. I hate them too."
Woman: (rolls eyes and displays a disgusted look on her face)

Remember, the underlying theme is that you have confidenc ein yourself and your core beliefs. You must have a strong inner game and strong game.
Women are so programmed to sh*t test they don't even consciously realize they're doing it.
Be prepared.
Or next her, and look for someone else.

 

[Bonhomme]

Interceptor pretty much nailed it, and I've only a few things to add.

Don't try to be C+F, or you'll just make an ass out of yourself too often. If it comes naturally, run with it. Go with the flow.

Trying too hard is the worst thing you can do. Be your best, and let them try to impress you.

 

[Jizzee]

Thanks for the advice Interceptor and Bonhomme. I forgot to mention in my post that my friend was gaming her and they were hitting it off. after we had made up, we went to another bar, when we were in there, i was kissing her friend while my friend was kissing the girl I had argued with. Then we went to a club, and we all started dancing, but at different parts of the dancefloor, i was dancing with the girl I wasnt really interested in, but she was a good dancer and seemed sweet so I did, and I was getting a bit of attention from people (good attention) cos I was dancing outrageously with this girl. Then, the girl I had argued with, started coming up to me and trying to take her friends place, but in an agressive manner, i acknowledged her but ignored her and carried on dancing with her friend. after the dancing (the dancefloor was quite smoky and dark, i ended up getting a handjob from the girl i was dancing with ) i had went back to the bar to talk to my friend, when the one i had argued with kept coming up to me, making conversation about random things, with tonnes and tonnes of kino (lower arm, upper arm, shoulder, waist, stomach, chest. also lots of smiling) but i ignored it, was polite, and went and spoke to my friend.
I dont think I'm just over-analysing this and interpreting it in the wrong way, but her attitude to me had completely changed. I dont know if she was interested, or was just being naturally friendly cos she liked my friend. But I take Kino as to mean that that person likes you and combined with the dancing incident I take it as she was interested in me.

I know this isnt going to be an overnight thing, especially my inner game, as i have spent most of my life in the dark about social situations, but I am determined.
The most important thing Ive come to believe is that throughout my life and the experiences to followis:
I will make mistakes, but its through making mistakes that I'll learn!

Thanks again guys, invaluable help from the Masters

Indebted good sirs...

David

 

[Jizzee]

oh, forgot to add....
Thinking about the incident in the bar, women love a bit of drama anyways ;-)