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tatlongxxx

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just wanna ask something about LTR......
is it ok to be funny (c&f) whenever she's with me or even in the phone? -- just to prove that i'm confident at all times.
and telling her stories or anything that comes in my mind so as not to bored her?

what should be a man's character when you are with your GF?


to tell you frankly, i dont know how to be a backbone.
Please have me some guidelines on how to.......
 

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Desdinova

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I'm going to be the ******* and point out the obvious. You're panicking because of your recent discovery, and you're looking to fix things that have started to deteriorate.

is it ok to be funny (c&f) whenever she's with me or even in the phone? -- just to prove that i'm confident at all times.
I'll answer this question. Yes, it's good to be c&f when you're in a relationship. It keeps things fun and interesting. However, you're only doing it to prove you're confident. You should be doing it because you're confident.

There's a major difference between proving and being confident.

- If you need to prove something, you need to gain the favor of other people.
- If you don't have to prove anything, you don't need to gain the favor of other people. You just do things because it pleases YOU, not other people.

Being c/f should actually be for your amusement only, not to gain somebody's favor.
 

SeldomSeen

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RE:

Im everything I can be to my girlfriend: cool, confident, funny, sometimes silly, confrontational, silent, etc etc. Its better to show a mix of traits than the same traits over and over again.
 

NewMan

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I think the real key is confidence.

I don't think that neccessarily means you have to be C&F.

Confidence can come through in many different ways.

If your trying to be C&F all of the time, then thats is just a receipe for disaster - as the girl will eventually see through your game.

Confidence comes through in all situations of life.

How you act around others.

How you deal with pressure.

How you hold youraself in uncomfortable situations.

The way you react to everyday life.

everything else is just pretend.

If you have real confidence then you will forget things such as C&F - it will just happen naturally.
 

tatlongxxx

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what is the best thing to do that she will miss me ???

Do we need to go out and be c&f chatting with her?

You know what guyz.......
i want her to swept of the floor, and madly inlove with me, thinking of me all the times.
i want her to feel depressed whenever i'm not with her.
 
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NewMan

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**
i want her to feel depressed whenever i'm not with her.
**

Think about that again.

Is that really the kind of woman you want to be with?

Not me Mr.

She will miss you because of the way you make her feel. Because of the fun she has with you. Because of who you are.

It comes down to so many things.

Confidence. Self esteem (yours). not being needy and desperate. Being fun. Being unpredictable. Not always being available (being a challenge).

Read the bible.
 

*29*

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Originally posted by tatlongxxx

You know what guyz.......
i want her to swept of the floor, and madly inlove with me, thinking of me all the times.
i want her to feel depressed whenever i'm not with her.
Sounds like you want to be swept off the floor, madly in love with her, and thinking of her all the time.

Sounds like you feel depressed whenever you're not with her.

Sounds like oneitis...start seeing more girls.
 

tatlongxxx

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i still dont know what to do to have this girl back
 

Rollo Tomassi

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I'm still C&F with my wife after 8.5 years of marriage. In fact I gave her a sh!t test as recently as last night before we hit it. And we hit it pretty good after this. She hits back with a sh!t test now and then too, it's like this reassurance mechanism that we're still with the right person, we made the right decision and we're confident with eachother. She pushes me, I push back, but it's like play-fighting. I've never actually had a real fight with her.

So yes, I'd say C&F into an LTR can be a good thing because it shows you're still the guy she was originally attracted to and you'll remain the guy she fell in love with. I think it's also important because it allows a guy to still send the subconscious message (even in marriage) that "Hey, I'm still confident enough to get another woman if you start to pull sh!t with me for real." Once you've decided to enter an LTR or marriage this can be the only way to push back in the common knowledge that she is you're only source of sex. If you stand up to the challenge it can be a buffer against her using sex as leverage for you to change or her to get you to do something you don't want to (and probably know you shouldn't do anyway). Married women continually give their husbands sh!t tests, but most guys dont realize it until after they've failed it. I've learned to identify them now and I've even gotten comfortable calling her out on them too, I'll say, "Oh, another sh!t test then 'eh?" When she knows I'm aware of her and I'm not going let her out of it, thats when she gets turned on.
 
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Men DON'T ask permission "TO BE" - this is the strength that men have - we are who and what we are - find a woman who sees the value in who YOU ARE!!! Never ask permission to be "fuuny" - this is a natural character trait for some men and women love it!!!
 
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