A little update..

[jhonny9546]

Hello friends!
For everyone who knows me here and knows my story, I'd like to give a little update.

I've moved out on my own, and while I'm renting, I'm looking for a house to buy.
I've also been working out consistently for a year now, both with weights and in a group I see at least twice a week.
I'm also continuing to develop my skills, constantly studying to obtain certifications for my career, and I'm trying to meet as many people as possible.

On a personal level, I've changed because I'm making every effort to not "control" others, but to "control" myself and my results.
I've cut several people off my social media list, people who talk behind my back, while continuing to engage with those I feel are trustworthy.

I don't date or go clubbing. Instead, I focus on capitalizing on the opportunities I have with the women I meet through my activities, while occasionally talking to someone outside of them.
Given my age, I typically interact with women who are already in relationships, single mothers.
It's really hard to find single women at this age.
That said, I continue to ask questions and be interested in relationship-related topics, and I try to apply your advice.

In summary, my current focus is on buying my first home and building a solid career/job while staying physically fit and healthy, while also trying to filter for a good woman.

Happy hunting, everyone.

 

[Gamisch]

Good to hear bro. Stay ambitious!

About the meeting women part; I know you won't like my advice. Perhaps others can and will give more technical feedback.

But imo you're doing fine and perhaps you should be LESS thirsty. And with thirsty I mean thirsty for that " perfect unicorn ". .

You can hold out and believe ( believing is great) that one sweet day you'll meet the perfect woman. But chances are you mightve missed out on some great adventures and ditto experiences by skipping the types of women you described. Relationships apart perhaps.

Be less thirsty, less picky just to get or keep the ball rolling and finally keep focusing on building yourself up and up and up.

 

[jhonny9546]

Glad to hear your words!

You can hold out and believe ( believing is great) that one sweet day you'll meet the perfect woman. But chances are you mightve missed out on some great adventures and ditto experiences by skipping the types of women you described. Relationships apart perhaps.

Be less thirsty

I'm actually filtering a lot, I do put women in 3 baskets: don't touch, s3x only, relationship material.
It's a hard time to find the s3x only in your thirties, if you aren't the man who's active on social media.
I don't want to f0ck women I know from my circle, like many friends do instead.


Actually finding a good one for a relationship needs some more work and time.. You know..
But I'm open to your advice for what "target" I should look for

 

[jhonny9546]

Hi friends!

I wanted to give you a little follow-up. (Please read the post I need your help)

I've been putting a lot of effort into improving myself, and I've made some progress. However, there are still a few things that I feel I might never be naturally good at.

a) Reading signals
Maybe I'm distracted, or maybe I'm too focused on something else. I tend to enjoy the moment instead of constantly thinking about whether she's giving me a signal or not.
Because of that, I often struggle to interpret the situation and make the "right" decision.

I can recognize the obvious signals, those are pretty clear to me by now. But unfortunately, I still miss many of the more subtle ones that a socially skilled guy would probably notice. And when I do notice them, I don't always know how to respond in a natural or appropriate way.

b) Skills
In simple terms, I've realized that you need certain practical skills to have fun with people, to play around, joke, and create enjoyable moments together.

It's like learning how to drive a car.
First, you learn how to change gears. Then you become familiar with the engine, the clutch, and how the car responds. Then you learn how to start again at a stop sign by putting the car into first gear.
Then you learn how to handle the steering wheel properly.
Then you learn how and when to brake.
All of these smaller skills eventually come together into one bigger skill: being able to drive well.

Now, whether it's with women or in life in general, you need to develop different skills.

For the past few months, I've been taking acting and dancing classes.
And now I feel like I've developed some new "tools" that I can use when interacting with women.

I enjoy spending time with them more because, when I meet someone, I have more ideas about what we can do together. I know how to create fun moments, joke around, and share an experience.
I don't know exactly how to explain it, but it's a bit like saying:
"Hey, I bought this new board game. Do you want to play? I'll explain it to you, I know how it works."

That's how I feel now. But.. while I feel like I have something that allows me to meet a woman and think "Hey, let's go have some fun", acting and dancing are only two skills, together with sexual experience, that I currently feel comfortable with.

I feel like there are still other skills that I'm missing.
What other skills do you think could be useful to learn?

Back in the past, someone told me to go dancing to improve my skills, so I liked that practical advice.
So please be practical in your advice.
I'm willing to put the effort to learn and develop new skills!



TL;DR: I've made progress, but I still miss a lot of signals (maybe there's a factory defect in my brain ), and I'm trying to figure out what other skills I could develop to say I have more tools to take that woman and have fun with her. Playing her like I know all the games I could do with her.