antidonjuan said:
I have flirted alot and got interest and attracted by many girls, but I often see girls hugging girls. However, I noticed this guy (most popular guy in our grade) hugs girls the first time he meets them. I talked to my female friend on msn and she said the guy hugged with all the girls he first met... This is rediculous because I have never see a guy do such a thing
I think girls don't ever iniate a hug to a guy but the popular guy initiate the hug to a girl. I know conversation and kino but I havn't hugged! When should I hug a girl after building some interest? Or go for it on the first meet like that guy?
It really depends on the woman. You have to be able to calibrate her (and the situation) effectively. It probably works for that guy because he is KNOWN for it. But there is this thing called
personal space, and violating someone's personal space in an unwelcome manner can be a serious breach of social etiquette and might blow you out.
I have hugged girls when I have first met them. I have also shaken their hands, and I have also NOT shaken their hands. In case you were wondering, social etiquette dictates that the man NOT shake the woman's hand unless she offers it first. And please, don't give her "the vice" when you do. But that's just a guideline. Doesn't have to be followed necessarily.
What it boils down to is being able to effetively calibrate. Would I "hug" a woman when I first meet her at the library? Of course not. Would I do it in a bar/club/house party setting? Perhaps. It depends.
I think a lot of guys on here just completely disregard etiquette in favor of some DJ "technique." The problem is that what works for one guy will not necessarily work for another. Women of value and class know the rules of etiquette, so you should too. It shows that you too have a certain amount of class. But at the same time, you can also put those rules aside in any given situation if you have properly calibrated.
My friend, there is no right or wrong answer. Each situation is entirely independent of another. Do some experimenting, and find out what boundaries exist with the women around you. We learn by making mistakes. If you fvck up, no big deal. But you're going to have to get your feet wet in order to find out what works best for you, your personality, and the situation.
Peace.
