jhonny9546
Master Don Juan
After my experiences, those of my friends, people online, and what I’ve studied about relationships, I’ve come to a conclusion: psychological games, manipulative tactics, and emotional rollercoasters are not only useless, but harmful and a waste of time, if we’ve become healthy, valuable individuals seeking another healthy, valuable person to build a real, meaningful relationship with.
I’ve seen many LTR's some lasting over ten years, with marriage and children. Behind the facade of stability, there’s often a never-ending cycle of fights, emotional breakups, and reconciliations. A love full of highs and lows, driven by unresolved trauma. Men, in particular, often use “techniques” to keep the tension alive, thinking that’s what sustains the relationship. But that’s not healthy love. Even the concept of “holding frame” in an absolute sense, where the partner is treated as someone who simply reacts to your actions like a cause-effect mechanism, is not healthy at all.
Furthermore, when a woman responds well to these toxic dynamics, it’s often because she has experienced similar trauma in the past. And you, unknowingly, are making her relive it. She, on her part, hasn’t yet learned how to become a healthy individual either, she’s just diving back into the familiar pattern of toxicity. (This is why so many sosuaver's are successfull with the tools they have with these chicks)
Sure, jokes, small arguments, and misunderstandings are part of any relationship. But being hyper-guarded and playing it “cool” out of fear of getting burned, hiding your thought process from your partner, doesn’t make you strong. It makes your partner an opponent, not a teammate.
I’ve also had the privilege of observing healthy relationships. Not perfect, because perfection doesn’t exist, but real. Few arguments, lots of communication, no games. Just mutual support, transparency, and a desire to grow together. When you see these couples, you understand what it truly means to feel at peace with someone.
In a mature LTR, if you’re not honest, emotionally stable, and authentic, you cannot expect real emotional intimacy. And if you’re still playing the “mysterious” guy or clinging to “frame” strategies at 30, a truly healthy woman will leave you very quickly. It’s no longer about controlling the frame—it’s about creating a safe space where both people can speak openly about issues. If anything, frame and leadership should be used to guide and make decisions after genuine confrontation and mutual understanding, not to avoid it.
That said… does “game” work? Yes, it can work even at 30 or 50. It might even get you into bed with a woman who’s taken, frustrated, or emotionally lost. But it will only leave you with emptiness, drama, and unnecessary risks. Growing up also means choosing healthy relationships, not just relationships that “work.”
Living in a relationship that is healthy, honest, with clear boundaries, mutual respect, and admiration, is one of the most fulfilling experiences you can have.
I’ve seen many LTR's some lasting over ten years, with marriage and children. Behind the facade of stability, there’s often a never-ending cycle of fights, emotional breakups, and reconciliations. A love full of highs and lows, driven by unresolved trauma. Men, in particular, often use “techniques” to keep the tension alive, thinking that’s what sustains the relationship. But that’s not healthy love. Even the concept of “holding frame” in an absolute sense, where the partner is treated as someone who simply reacts to your actions like a cause-effect mechanism, is not healthy at all.
Furthermore, when a woman responds well to these toxic dynamics, it’s often because she has experienced similar trauma in the past. And you, unknowingly, are making her relive it. She, on her part, hasn’t yet learned how to become a healthy individual either, she’s just diving back into the familiar pattern of toxicity. (This is why so many sosuaver's are successfull with the tools they have with these chicks)
Sure, jokes, small arguments, and misunderstandings are part of any relationship. But being hyper-guarded and playing it “cool” out of fear of getting burned, hiding your thought process from your partner, doesn’t make you strong. It makes your partner an opponent, not a teammate.
I’ve also had the privilege of observing healthy relationships. Not perfect, because perfection doesn’t exist, but real. Few arguments, lots of communication, no games. Just mutual support, transparency, and a desire to grow together. When you see these couples, you understand what it truly means to feel at peace with someone.
In a mature LTR, if you’re not honest, emotionally stable, and authentic, you cannot expect real emotional intimacy. And if you’re still playing the “mysterious” guy or clinging to “frame” strategies at 30, a truly healthy woman will leave you very quickly. It’s no longer about controlling the frame—it’s about creating a safe space where both people can speak openly about issues. If anything, frame and leadership should be used to guide and make decisions after genuine confrontation and mutual understanding, not to avoid it.
That said… does “game” work? Yes, it can work even at 30 or 50. It might even get you into bed with a woman who’s taken, frustrated, or emotionally lost. But it will only leave you with emptiness, drama, and unnecessary risks. Growing up also means choosing healthy relationships, not just relationships that “work.”
Living in a relationship that is healthy, honest, with clear boundaries, mutual respect, and admiration, is one of the most fulfilling experiences you can have.