"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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A good response to "Sorry I haven't called" ?

LowPlainsDrifter

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I recently met a woman I like who's moving. She seemed amenable to getting together for dinner soon, but when I called her recently she sounded a bit agitated and told me she couldn't do it until she was completely settled in.
We've talked a few times since then (I fix her computers, and she calls me with occasional questions), and every time we talk she says voluntarily "I'm still unpacking... but when I'm done we'll go out."
I'm just looking for suggestions for something to say other than, "OK" or "Sure"
I'm not particularly optimistic or pessimistic that we'll get together, but I'd like some suggestions for something a bit livelier to say in reply.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Shiftkey

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*jokingly* "well you'd better hurry, or some other lucky lady might get me first"

This is the wrong forum for this kind of question BTW.
 

cant think of a user name

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and every time we talk she says voluntarily "I'm still unpacking... but when I'm done we'll go out."
So she's the one who's bringing that topic up...

Just smile a little as if to acknowledge it, and not say anything. I don't know if that's the 'lively' answer you're looking for but like you said, you're fairly indifferent about whether or not you get together with her, so I think that response would best reflect what you are thinking at the time.
 

LowPlainsDrifter

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Greetings, Can't think:

Not a bad idea, except she is saying this over the phone!
I could still smile, but it wouldn't be visible!
But at least she's prefacing her messages (business calls)
with this, and saying it again when I call her back.
I just feel that I need to say something other besides
"OK" or "sure" that isn't needy ("OK, so when do you think
that might be"), or overly C&F, ("Let's see what happens first -
us getting together, or my hair turning gray?")

I'm trying to avoid what happened with another woman I
liked. After a rather "charged"
first and second meetup (business reasons),
we had a nice lunch together, and I called her a day
or two later for a followup date. Never heard back from
her, but when I ran into her at a store a few months
later, she launched into
why she hadn't called and I said, "well, I wasn't looking
for an explanation" "That wasn't an explanation" she replied,
and walked away.
 

diplomatic_lies

Master Don Juan
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Tell her in a menacing voice..."You just made your last cancellation, little girl..."
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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