A girl who flakes *sometimes*

[Nickface]

So I'm talking to this interesting chick and for the most part, things are pretty well. Problem is that she tends to flake sometimes. We would hang out like twice and then we make plans for a third meetup, she would flake day of. Hang out again and then bam flake day of. She actually does reschedule and initiates most contact we have. So this is not exactly an inditement on her.

How do you handle girls like this? Is the cancelations early on trouble for you? You look forward to meeting and then it sucks to have it cancel. Who knows how legitimate the excuses are. One time her stomach was hurting and another time she had a meeting... What's next?

Discuss!

 

[adam225]

You need to pull her up on it. Don't be rude - just straight to the point. If you don't say anything she'll start to perceive you as a doormat. She needs to know your time is precious and you won't tolerate being messed around (she'll respect you for this - trust me).

 

[Nickface]

You need to pull her up on it. Don't be rude - just straight to the point. If you don't say anything she'll start to perceive you as a doormat. She needs to know your time is precious and you won't tolerate being messed around (she'll respect you for this - trust me).

Yea I was thinking about doing this approach as opposed to saying "oh it's ok, feel better." Don't want any games to be played here...

 

[PlayHer Man]

Spin more plates. Flakes will bore you and weed themselves out.

Also don't be afraid to tell her to STOP FLAKING. Most men put up with bullsh!t from women because they are afraid of making her mad and thus losing access to her. This is retarded when you really think about it.

A woman with high interest wants to make you happy and will want to prove she is "special". I would tell her to stop flaking. Something like:

"Listen, I know sh!t happens in life, but frequent flaking is unacceptable. It needs to stop."

This is a great test because if she changes her behavior to please you it means high interest. If she keeps flaking it means she is a rebellious c*nt who will never be a worthy partner (only good for sex).

 

[Bwana]

The next time she wants to reschedule and gives you a day that is good for her tell her that day is not good for you. You have a friend who wanted to cook dinner for your. She will not need to be told anything else as guys don't cook dinner for other guys at your age and will know you mean a female. This will display higher value than she assumes you have and she will realize that she needs to stop playing games or loose you.

 

[Bwana]

Oh by the way, I suspect that currently you are set up as her alternate plan if she doesn't find anything better to do she has you to fall back on. I would not bother telling her not to flake I would let her figure out that you are not a beta by your actions. Women do not understand logic and will not respond in a manner that is logical. Letting her know her flaking upsets you shows your invested in her. You need to create insecurity. If she has true High interest it will work quickly if the interest is moderate she will come around or move and save you a lot of emotional pain in the long run.

 

[Nickface]

Thanks for the advice guys!

Oh by the way, I suspect that currently you are set up as her alternate plan if she doesn't find anything better to do she has you to fall back on. I would not bother telling her not to flake I would let her figure out that you are not a beta by your actions. Women do not understand logic and will not respond in a manner that is logical. Letting her know her flaking upsets you shows your invested in her. You need to create insecurity. If she has true High interest it will work quickly if the interest is moderate she will come around or move and save you a lot of emotional pain in the long run.

This sounds spot on. I'm set up pretty good to come up with the "someone is cooking for me" line. We initially said we both can hang out today or Friday so if she looks to reschedule for tomorrow I will just say sorry made plans already etc...

I will gauge interest level after that. She will either back away or be more aggressive. I'd take any of those responses right now.

 

[Bingo-Player]

exact same thing happened to me a fortnight ago bro

my chick was seeing another guy ....one that was already well in her social circle and had been for years i couldn't compete so went completely ghost as soon as i found out she couldn't understand why and i felt like ****e for a few days

but at least now when the other guy fu*cks her off i can still get laid with very little trouble

 

[Greasy Pig]

I'd say there's definitely another guy in the picture and she only sees you when he's not available.
By the way, are you fvcking this chick?

 

[TARKUS]

She likes you but she has another guy she is seeing too on the days she skips your date.

 

[Nickface]

Thanks guys. Time to play the next card. I got the feeling that's probably what's going on. Not that it's wrong or anything... Haven't slept with her yet btw.

I'm going to try to find out though if she's with another dude and be sneaky about it just for reference on my part...

 

[E-Male]

Nickface, how long has this been going on? Is this new or has this been happening for a while?

 

[Bokanovsky]

A woman with high interest wants to make you happy and will want to prove she is "special". I would tell her to stop flaking.

A woman with high interest will not flake on you in the first place. Personally, I wouldn't even bother telling her to stop flaking. The solution is to spin more plates and treat the flake as a casual side piece.

 

[Nickface]

Nickface, how long has this been going on? Is this new or has this been happening for a while?

A few weeks. Not too long. I don't know her long enough to know if she's actually busy or not...

A woman with high interest will not flake on you in the first place. Personally, I wouldn't even bother telling her to stop flaking. The solution is to spin more plates and treat the flake as a casual side piece.

Hard truth! Sounds legit man.