"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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A girl I don't know very well -- Advice Please!

Munchking

Don Juan
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I'll try and make this post shorter than my first one...

I had never met her. One Sunday night in early December, she calls me on the phone. I go to a boarding school, so finding anybody's phone number is no big deal.

She needed to interview a member of the opposite sex, and write an essay about him, for her English class. She also needed to observe him doing something (playing music or a sport or doing art or something like that). She said that a friend had told her to call me, although I know her English teacher very well and suspect that he might have suggested interviewing me.

I agreed and we arranged to meet on Tuesday night. She would watch me fold Origami (I don't have a winter sport, and I used to be a wizard at Origami), and then interview me. I was actually worried that this was some sort of prank because she was quite popular and had never met me before. But, she showed up...

We connected really well, I gave her some samples of Origami, and we talked about my life and a bit about the Beatles (which we discovered we both like). She had planned to stay for about 45 mins, and ended up leaving two hours later.

I only saw her once or twice since then and she always greeted me enthusiastically, but we never talked. Then, after reading much on these forums, I called her up the night before Spring Break began and asked her to show me the paper she wrote. She said she didn't have a copy, and was very apologetic about it, so I told her that our friendship was jeopardized and that she better find a copy over break.

Now spring break is over, and she was extremely apologetic but she didn't have the paper. I told her that our friendship was over.

I'm wondering if there's any way for me to move this "ex-friendship" in a more, ah, productive direction?

Any suggestions would be appreciated.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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dannowillbookem

Master Don Juan
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florida baby
Tell her you two will have to go out to dinner Thursday night and for formalities sake will have to call it a date since you can't be friends anymore.

Hows she look? Good body?
 

ARrocket

Master Don Juan
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dannowillbookem said:
Tell her you two will have to go out to dinner Thursday night and for formalities sake will have to call it a date since you can't be friends anymore.

Hows she look? Good body?
HAHA yeah use this one :)
 

Munchking

Don Juan
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dannowillbookem said:
Tell her you two will have to go out to dinner Thursday night and for formalities sake will have to call it a date since you can't be friends anymore.
I'll have to fine-tune the exact details, but I like that general idea :up:

dannowillbokem said:
Hows she look?
Yes.

That's all I've got to say.

:yes:h yes.
 
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