"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

A facebook question (respond pls)

jafyk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 4, 2008
Messages
1,010
Reaction score
26
Location
San Diego, California
Ok, there's this girl (Joci) in my french class. She added me the other day as a friend on facebook. We don't even talk to each other in class (not because we have anything against each other) I do ask a lot of questions in class and the female teacher picks on me and there's another girl in class that sits close to me (Amanda) who I'd rather get with but she has a bf so, we just talk, flirt and study sometimes. Anyway this is just to give u some back ground info. So, my question is why does a girl like Joci add me on facebook even though we hardly talk to and although I've added her on facebook she doesn't IM me or anything. I also looked on her status and see she's in a relationship. What is the meaning of this? She's not the first girl to have added me randomly and then never even chat me up or anything. So, why this behavior. Anybody know? Thanks.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

Big Poppa

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 9, 2009
Messages
82
Reaction score
1
She might just want another FB friend to add on the list.

OR

She went "half way" in trying to talk to you and is waiting for you to initiate some contact.
 

catman

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 15, 2009
Messages
158
Reaction score
2
Location
midwest
Shes an attention ***** face book is full of them!!! Or shes looking for someone to replace her current bf.Women also think that the more friends they have on fb or my space or tagged the more popular they are even if they dont really know or talk to these people.:yes:
 

jafyk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 4, 2008
Messages
1,010
Reaction score
26
Location
San Diego, California
I did IM her today and asked if she was the gal in my french class. She responded she was and within a few mins said she had to go. That was that. The thing I hate about the American culture is that people are so indirect. By the time they are direct it's too late.
 

jafyk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 4, 2008
Messages
1,010
Reaction score
26
Location
San Diego, California
catman said:
Shes an attention ***** face book is full of them!!! Or shes looking for someone to replace her current bf.Women also think that the more friends they have on fb or my space or tagged the more popular they are even if they dont really know or talk to these people.:yes:

Interesting , I see. Well, every now and then I periodically go to my facebook and delete inactive contacts. Still, why did she choose to pick me? Even though I don't even talk to her in class?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

ThatMysteriousGuy

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 30, 2009
Messages
275
Reaction score
17
Don't read extra meaning into it. She was probably playing around, clicked some stuff in FB and you had common friends (or whatever) so she added you.

That's the most likely scenario. Assuming it means something about her personality is ridiculous. She might have been startled to actually get an IM when she was just messing around with FB.

Pretend it didn't happen and don't worry about it. It also might be that she's interested. If so, she'll be trying to get your attention in or around class.

Be casual if that happens and she'll become more blatant about it and you'll be on your way :up:

EDIT A FEW SECONDS LATER: (just looked up a few posts, very similar to what Big Poppa said)
 

handle

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 18, 2005
Messages
893
Reaction score
108
It's how high school works, man. Everyone adds everyone they even moderately know. It means next to nothing.
 

jafyk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 4, 2008
Messages
1,010
Reaction score
26
Location
San Diego, California
Anyway, I ran into her yesterday in another building where I take classes, apparently she's taking classes here too. I think she saw me first and said hi. What is weird is she's one of those girls I have to think for a person if it's the same person. Anyway, we spoke briefly cos she had to use the restroom and I had to go and I didn't want to wait for her to come out. I know you'd say why didn't you use false time constraint to ask for her # and then split. The way I see it I think ppl have to have a convo that segues into asking for a contact info. I didn't have that given how eager she was to get to the restroom. When I don't have that segue I usually don't ask for the contact info. There are times too when I see hot girls I like but I don't engage them because I'm not in that frame of mind, so I feel like if I do force it and engage her the convo will end up weird and I won't be on my game so I just let it go. I don't know if this is a good or bad thing. Anyway, next time I see this Joci gal by herself I'ill try to get her #
 
Top