A Direct Approach FR

[Magma]

I know there has been a lot of discussion on here lately about DA. I've become more inclined towards DA, simply because the only thing it relies on is inner game. It's true what advocates of DA say: true confidence shines through in any situation. I always thought I needed some "routine" or "pattern" that followed a linear progression in order to create rapport and attraction and all that other stuff.

I spent last weekend up in the mountains pondering this, and came to the conclusion that women are women, and men are men. Plain and simple. Various "methods" only inhibit, and in some cases, may produce more anxiety in the approach. I had approach anxiety even though I had a canned routine set up. I thought to myself, "What if I forget something?" Or "What if I say *x* and then she responds with *y*?" Trying to anticipate all the permutations had me stressed even more. I came back from the mountains with a new outlook. Here's what happened tonight...

I was at a bar with my brothers after work shooting the sh1t. I saw this hostess that I thought was very attractive. A little Mexican girl, legit HB7. I tend to be attracted to girls that aren't white for some reason (I am white myself, but that doesn't matter). So I said to myself that I am going for the cold approach. I had already made eye contact with her, so the time was NOW. I walked up to the sign where it says "Please Wait To Be Seated" and this is how it went down:

HB7: Hi. Did you need to be seated?

Magma: No, thanks. Actually I noticed you while I was sitting over there and thought you were very attractive. I was wondering if I could get your number.

HB7: Well, I just moved back here and I'm staying with my grandparents and don't have a phone yet. Can I get YOUR #?

Magma: I would be offended if you didn't. (big grin) It's blah blah blah. BTW, I like your tattoo. Who does your work?

HB7: It's actually a cover up.

Magma: An old bf's name? (smiling) (at this point I kino her arm tat and am looking her DIRECTLY in the eyes while smiling)

HB7: (laughs) Actually, yeah! (we both laugh)

Magma: Ok, I'll let you get back to work. I look forward to talking to you soon.

HB7: (HUGE grin, mind you) Ok, I look forward to it too.

And I'm out...


Here's the thing. I am NOT in friend mode with this chick. She is clear about my intentions. I guarantee you she is at work right now thinking about ME and how I made her FEEL. I'm very perceptive to people's emotions, and I know for a fact that I totally rocked her world at that moment. She was DDB right there in front of me. I am a firm believer in the DA now. I think maybe some people make it more complicated than it needs to be. She's just a CHICK. Nothing more. She wants a guy that is spontaneous and willing to go after something he wants. I wanted her number and went after it. Plain and simple.

I realize now that I was hampered by patterns and canned material. The thing we all need to realize is we have to work on our inner game before we can attempt to attract a woman. I chop motorcycles, sculpt with concrete, go river rafting, teach history, have a master's degree, and have a slew of other activities that occupy my time. I am a happy and interesting guy. I DON'T need validation from a woman. My life will go on, whether she accepts or rejects my approach. I don't care. She's just a chick. She might be a future gf, fvck buddy, or future wife for all I know. All I know is that I gave myself the opportunity to find out.

Mind you, I wasn't always this way. However, by scouring the net for information on this thing we call "the game," I have discovered that I first needed to be comfortable and confident with myself and who I am. The entire time I was talking to her (it took about 30 secs to close the deal, no shi1t), I was smiling and confident. And I BELIEVED IT. That's the key. You have to believe that you are the sh1t. I talked to her slowly, in a non-threating tone, and was direct about my intentions. Pure and simple. This is no secret. We're all here to improve our lives. This will translate into better relations with EVERYONE. Work on the inner game, and the rest will follow.

Respect.

 

[Phyzzle]

Hmm . . . good approach, but I think it's a bad example.

You did get rejected there, if you couldn't tell.

 

[ChrizZ]

You did a great job, but lets look at the facts here.

She wasn't that attractive or why did u rate her a 7?

She just moved there. Means she doesn't know a lot of people and doesn't have a real social circle yet. It also means she doesn't have a bf and doesn't have any options.

It doesn't work that way on the extremely hot chicks. U rarely see them alone. If u see them alone they keep talking on the phone and running through the street and being busy going somewhere. They aren't looking for a bf because they have so many options so u have to stand out. There are enough alpha males in her life that make their intentions clear to her, but she still rejects them.

 

[zerocelcius]

Magma my man,

Nice to know you field tested the DA we were all discussing. Phyzzle might be right about it, but we will see. By her saying she had no number might have been her rejecting you in a nice way (her family has a phone and if she wanted you to call her she would have given it to you.)

That is the problem with Hired Guns they are at work and very defensive. Time will tell let us know if she calls.

However; I have to give you props for finding out the puzzle. You are into it for yourself now. You have reached the brass ring. And you are right she is just another person with an Opinion. Rejection or not, you are the same and you have your head right.

My problem with this (not yours but in general) DA is it cuts out the fundamentals that spike the interest, increase conformability, establish worth, heighten connection, increase sexual arousal (you did Kino, GJ) and isolate the Mark.

So yea Respect on the Field Test. But you did so good with your last FR that I would hate to see you lose the skills you have by settling for this form of DA. There are many forms of DA and you did it with your last FR.

You seem to be a Natural at it and I know you will settle into your Natural Style.

DA is the best Approach, but not the DA that cuts out the Fundamentals. You don't have to have canned stuff. That is there just in case. You can DA just like you did here and also include the Basics.

Keep it up and Keep us informed.

Respect.

 

[Magma]

Ratings, shmatings. I found her attractive to ME. The only reason I rated her a seven was because of all the debate about ratings. Ratings are beside the point. And I don't think I got rejected at all. All the signs of attraction were there. Even if you think I may have been rejected because she took my number instead of the other way around, I still think it's a good example of being direct with the approach and my intentions. Success or failure, I still approached with confidence. That's the point I was trying to make.

Also, I didn't know that she had just moved back here. How could I have known that? And who cares? Again, besides the point. I have become a more confident person in my life, and this is just an example of how that confidence has affected my ability to approach with less anxiety.

Respect.

 

[Magma]

Magma my man,

Nice to know you field tested the DA we were all discussing. Phyzzle might be right about it, but we will see. By her saying she had no number might have been her rejecting you in a nice way (her family has a phone and if she wanted you to call her she would have given it to you.)

That is the problem with Hired Guns they are at work and very defensive. Time will tell let us know if she calls.

However; I have to give you props for finding out the puzzle. You are into it for yourself now. You have reached the brass ring. And you are right she is just another person with an Opinion. Rejection or not, you are the same and you have your head right.

My problem with this (not yours but in general) DA is it cuts out the fundamentals that spike the interest, increase conformability, establish worth, heighten connection, increase sexual arousal (you did Kino, GJ) and isolate the Mark.

So yea Respect on the Field Test. But you did so good with your last FR that I would hate to see you lose the skills you have by settling for this form of DA. There are many forms of DA and you did it with your last FR.

You seem to be a Natural at it and I know you will settle into your Natural Style.

DA is the best Approach, but not the DA that cuts out the Fundamentals. You don't have to have canned stuff. That is there just in case. You can DA just like you did here and also include the Basics.

Keep it up and Keep us informed.

Respect.

Zero, in my intro post, I talk of my time as a poker player. I have discovered many similarities between picking up women and poker. In each, there are an infinite amount of situations which require an understanding of the basic and advanced fundamentals in order to choose the best decision given a limited amount of information. Am I going to abandon the "fundies?" Not a chance. She was working, and the situation called for DA. The same girl, in another situation, might require a more linear progression of attraction, rapport, etc. My time at the tables has given me the ability to discern deceit. Time will tell if I am right about this one. But it's no different than calling on the river when you know you're beat, just to gain info on betting patterns. If I got rejected, then I'll re-analyze the situation to determine what the "tell" is. I keep you posted Zero.

Respect.

 

[zerocelcius]

That is what I meant about her working...

Some Hired Guns are worth it!! I am not saying anything bad about your FR. You grabbed your balls took advantage of the cards on the table.

Also I am not saying you got Rejected, but could be possible. I hope you didn't!

In the bible within the first few links there is a post where a guy does almost the same thing as you here, but she gave him the wrong #. He went back and DA'd two other girls right in front of the first girl. He #Closed the 3'rd girl and everything worked out.

Like I said Hired Guns are tricky. Like you said. She was working so you had to use the approach that you felt was best for the situation.

The only thing I was saying ^, was the 30sec DA cuts everything out that has been established to get a successful and dynamic connection.

Good Job again on the DA and FT. Keep it up!

 

[EFFORT]

hey magma you know about twoplustwo.com?

 

[Magma]

I was always a lurker, never a poster. At least on twoplustwo. Twoplustwo was a great resource in my playing days. Sklansky was one of my first reads about 12 years ago when I first started playing in the casinos. Mad respect for everyone on there. What's your game/limit of choice?