Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

A challenging career situation

SmoothnNerdy

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 22, 2011
Messages
35
Reaction score
0
Hi Guys,
I'm in a challenging situation with my career that I hope some of you successful types could chime in on. Here's my story.

I'm a very capable specialist in IT who graduated with the highest honours in my program. Working that hard in school burned me out. I worked at a very successful technology company for my coop terms and have stayed with them past graduation. School burned me out so hard that going to work felt a like a bit of a break for me and while I produced really good technical results, I made a lot of mistakes politically and have learned a lot about how to carry myself in an office environment after 4 years of full time.

Now I'm in a position where I am possibly the best at what I do, and while I've moved on from my foolish behaviour and really stepped my game up the past couple years, I fear others will never see me for who I am today. In the past 2 years I've received many awards and lots of praise from my leadership but never awarded more than a 3% raise or a promotion of any kind since I was hired. Management above me has changed every year I've been here, so I don't think that has helped much either.

I am a master in my current specialization and have been offered salaries of over double what I currently make to work abroad. Unfortunately my current personal situation restricts me from moving, and while I'm stuck here, this is still the best place for me to further my skill set in a technical specialization that excites me.

I am so frustrated and confused about my position, it was so foolish for me to work so hard in school and yet let my guard down when entering my career. There's nothing I can do about the past now.

There are occasions when I'm asked to go above and beyond for the business, and I have done so with perfect execution many times over the past couple years. These events have been extremely high stress and exhausting but as well as I do, I don't think I've ever been rewarded accordingly. I'm starting to think its time for me to decline these requests as they don't seem to be appreciated... Should I take a stand, or is there a smarter way to deal with this?
 

The Duke

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 4, 2008
Messages
5,271
Reaction score
7,685
Age
47
A 3pct raise is pretty much the going rate in corporate America these days. You can expect more but most aren't getting it!
 

SmoothnNerdy

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 22, 2011
Messages
35
Reaction score
0
Howiestern said:
A 3pct raise is pretty much the going rate in corporate America these days. You can expect more but most aren't getting it!
Understandable, but it would cost them at the very least +30% to replace me.
 

PlayHer Man

Banned
Joined
Dec 22, 2012
Messages
1,712
Reaction score
189
Location
East Coast USA
SmoothnNerdy said:
Hi Guys,
I'm in a challenging situation with my career that I hope some of you successful types could chime in on. Here's my story.

I'm a very capable specialist in IT who graduated with the highest honours in my program. Working that hard in school burned me out. I worked at a very successful technology company for my coop terms and have stayed with them past graduation. School burned me out so hard that going to work felt a like a bit of a break for me and while I produced really good technical results, I made a lot of mistakes politically and have learned a lot about how to carry myself in an office environment after 4 years of full time.

Now I'm in a position where I am possibly the best at what I do, and while I've moved on from my foolish behaviour and really stepped my game up the past couple years, I fear others will never see me for who I am today. In the past 2 years I've received many awards and lots of praise from my leadership but never awarded more than a 3% raise or a promotion of any kind since I was hired. Management above me has changed every year I've been here, so I don't think that has helped much either.

I am a master in my current specialization and have been offered salaries of over double what I currently make to work abroad. Unfortunately my current personal situation restricts me from moving, and while I'm stuck here, this is still the best place for me to further my skill set in a technical specialization that excites me.

I am so frustrated and confused about my position, it was so foolish for me to work so hard in school and yet let my guard down when entering my career. There's nothing I can do about the past now.

There are occasions when I'm asked to go above and beyond for the business, and I have done so with perfect execution many times over the past couple years. These events have been extremely high stress and exhausting but as well as I do, I don't think I've ever been rewarded accordingly. I'm starting to think its time for me to decline these requests as they don't seem to be appreciated... Should I take a stand, or is there a smarter way to deal with this?
You seem to have forgotten that the corporate world is corrupt and driven by politics and connections. You don't get a promotion simply by "doing a good job". You get a promotion by kissing the right ass and being in good graces with the right people.

Its about relationships. Being good at your job is just a bonus.

Companies are like women.. they will exploit you if you let them. They will suck you dry and give you nothing in return (if you LET them). Also.. just like with women.. if they believe they are the only game in town.. they will treat you like garbage :D
 

backbreaker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 24, 2002
Messages
11,643
Reaction score
572
Location
monrovia, CA
This is going to sound corny as hell but it's true. If you want to skyrocket up the ladder stop worrying about what your company is doing for you, how much you are paid. Stop doing things with the expectation of things being done for you. Successful people do more work than they are paid for so that they can eventually get paid more for the work they do.

The real key to making money,and this took me a while to learn even despite some early success in life, is to make other people as much money as you an possibly make them. Make your boss shine and he will not have a choice but to take you with him if he wants to continue up. Be of service. Be of maximium service, with no strings attached. Make it your goal to make your boss If you are 1. of service all the time with no strings attached 2. provide an unique trait or skill set that makes people depend on you, it's not possible for you not to get where you want to go eventually becuase you are making other people money.
 

origin138

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 20, 2011
Messages
336
Reaction score
42
Location
Colorado
OP,

I'd like to recommend a good book called "The 48 Laws of Power" by Robert Greene and Joost Elffers.

Law 11 states:

Learn to Keep People Dependent on You

To maintain your independence you must always be needed and wanted. The more you are relied on, the more freedom you have. Make people depend on you for their happiness and prosperity and you have nothing to fear. Never teach them enough so that they can do without you.


In simple terms, go above and beyond when you can, then stop for a period of time. Make it so people are dependent on you to perform certain tasks, then make yourself unavailable. People will start to recognize what you bring to the table when they don't have it anymore. Is this a guarantee? No, but it's the best approach imo. Sad, but this dynamic is true in most social situations. Words fall short, actions speak volumes. You can "tell" people how valuable you are as much as you want, but until people "see" your value, they'll never grasp it.

Be careful to make the distinction between "being needed and relied on" and flat out being taken advantage of. Also, document all of your successes in the framework of the company. In most cases, just shy of a promotion, 3% is par for the course. An alternative would be that you could also start your own business, gather new clients, and get a 3% raise every month :)

On another note, I earned my Masters in electrical engineering and have not used it once. It's OK to betray your college degree/debt if better opportunities arise.

Just some food for thought.
 

SmoothnNerdy

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 22, 2011
Messages
35
Reaction score
0
Thanks Guys,
I appreciate the overwhelming responses. There's a lot of good wisdom here. I know I've been pigeon holed as Danger described but I've always made myself available when there's an emergency situation. Origin, do you think I should make myself unavailable at the next request?

I agree with the lateral corporate hopping from one company to another in order to move up but I was hoping I could do something while I'm stuck here.

Backbreaker, I agree with your attitude. My problem is how do you deal with the emotions that come from pouring yourself into something and feeling like nothings coming in return. I'm doing everything I can to hold myself from doing something self destructive. It really sucks that my leadership has changed so often, I honestly think that if I had been doing this for one boss all these years, much more would have come back to me.
 

backbreaker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 24, 2002
Messages
11,643
Reaction score
572
Location
monrovia, CA
Backbreaker, I agree with your attitude. My problem is how do you deal with the emotions that come from pouring yourself into something and feeling like nothings coming in return. I'm doing everything I can to hold myself from doing something self destructive. It really sucks that my leadership has changed so often, I honestly think that if I had been doing this for one boss all these years, much more would have come back to me.
I understand (more than you can possibly imagine) your frustration. The problem in reality is your attitude about the entire thing.

A book that changed my outlook on life really is the laws of success by Napoleon hill. His other book gets the headlines but this book is the bread and butter. One thing he makes quite clear in the book if not the underlying motif of the entire book, and it's a 1000 page book, is that the difference between people who are wealthy and people who are not wealthy is that people who are not wealthy don't understand the golden rule (that it's not possible for you to not get paid for the work you do) in some way, shape or form. it's just not. Non wealthy people look at the here and now. I did this now I want to be paid now. and when they don't get what they feel is just, they get pissy, and you can forget them going above and beyond.

The wealthy person understands that i might work now and i might not be paid now. I might get used, I might get ripped off. NOW. But I will be paid and paid in full at some point.

I own a web development company now, and when I started in 2007, I didn't have one site in my portfolio. not one. I would take jobs for free, jobs at stupidly small rates just to get the work in my portfolio. We built a 3,000 dollar social networking ite for nothing. as in literally nothing. We litearlly just gave the dude the site. And you would see web developers demanding to be paid 40-50 dollars an hour beucase they are programmers with ****ty portfolios.

In 2012 we cranked out about 50 sites. We've done what...9 so far already this year and now I don't touch small projects unless I'm doing a favor for someone and that doesn't count the touch up work we do on sites or site maintenance and I cna do that beucase our portfolio, for the work we do, is the best. If I want a job that is in our niche, I'm' going to get it more times than not if you want the best. And the only way I coudl get to that point, was to give away work beucase I knew what we could do, I just had to show everyone else we coudl get it.

My point being in a long winded way that, don't think that beucase you aren't getting paid in the here and now that you aren't getting paid. It took us 5-6 years for us to get paid. But we are getting PAID. and **** I honestly might work 20 hours a week ont hat job I do that for ****s and giggles.

Just keep your head up buddy and keep working and learning.
 

SmoothnNerdy

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 22, 2011
Messages
35
Reaction score
0
Networking
15,000
4 layers between me and our COO
IT recently got scaled down to around 200

Sorry, I'm not the most comfortable posting this stuff
 
Last edited:

Jitterbug

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 12, 2008
Messages
3,230
Reaction score
143
Focus much of your time and effort on resolving said personal situation (and be ruthless about it) so you regain your freedom of movement. You can't deal with your career situation effectively when you don't have options. You may not need to move anywhere, but as long as you know you can, and they also know you can, you're in a very strong bargaining position.
 

samspade

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 5, 2008
Messages
7,996
Reaction score
5,054
Have you ever asked for a raise? I think you can make your case. Write down all of your accomplishments and how you helped the company. Ask for something reasonable but significant. The worst they can do is say no, and they will respect you for asking. It's just business, they will understand.

One thing I've learned is that no matter how nice, managers will take as much as they can from you and give as little as they can back. And why not? They're in business for the bottom line. YOU are in business for your bottom line, so it's in your interest to extract what you're worth.

If you really wanna be bold you could use the overseas offers as leverage. In any case if your superiors know they may lose someone talented, they'll raise your salary. If not, they don't deserve you.
 

Jitterbug

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 12, 2008
Messages
3,230
Reaction score
143
Oh wait, I was assuming that OP has already asked for a raise and was turned down. If not, what are you waiting for, OP? Your workplace must have some regular performance reviews, right? Or you know when budget time is? Officially make your case around then. I'm always surprised by guys (although usually it's women who just sit back and expect more money) who don't ask but prefer whining about it instead. You're not worth the extra money if you don't even have the confidence to ask for it.
 

Scaramouche

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 27, 2008
Messages
3,765
Reaction score
948
Age
80
Location
Australia
Dear SmoothNurd,
People get branded after a few weeks in a job,sounds as though you were too honest,blunt perhaps...Takes a long while to get out of the bucket they put you in....The mistake is in thinking that being good at your tasks is the name of the game....Naa!! in fact it cause insecure colleagues to stab you in the back,the main thing is to do your job,don't complain and make a point of praising anyone and everyone.....There is always a dominant group,observe them and their accolytes...Often they will be members of some fraternal group,so they may be controlled outside work.....The favourites are The Masonic Lodges,Knights of Columbas,Rotary.....perhaps they have religious links?........In the past Catholics in this Country could be either discriminated for or against,learn how to spot the key groups,identify one and often a spiders web of contacts emerges...In the mean time,go to every social get together offered,if there are canapes or a Champagne bottle doing the rounds,make sure you are the eager Beever walking it round...Course I never did it that way,but on reflection,Life would have been a lot easier if I had got a little gravel on my knees LOL!
 

Brosy

Don Juan
Joined
May 10, 2012
Messages
134
Reaction score
12
Location
UK
If you let on that you ain't going anywhere due to a restricting "personal situation" or that you believe "this is still the best place for me to further my skill set in a technical specialization that excites me." they aren't going to start throwing money at you!

IMO 4 years is too long to be doing any role, your boss must be happy though, they are tasked with keeping together a good team and he/she knows there's no risk of you rocking that boat any time soon.

I would suggest you start looking at internal vacancies, if you're as good as you say, your reputation will give you the advantage with any internal applications.

As Danger said, if you want the real money jumps you need to look externally. This can be a gamble as there's no guarantee the grass is greener, but you will have the money you wanted... you may also get a counter-offer to consider when you try to leave :)
 

SmoothnNerdy

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 22, 2011
Messages
35
Reaction score
0
Thanks for all the great advice guys. Yes, I have asked for raises but when it came the right time for me, when I really shine, it's the wrong time for the company. It's a large company in a rocky financial situation just trying to make the big turnaround, cost reduction is a major concern and most would say I'm just lucky to have made it through the layoffs. I am in the headquarters. I always knew relationships matter but I'm beginning to realize how much more important they are from what I had thought a couple years ago. I think the reality for me now is to bide my time, get even better at my focus, already addressing much of the items you mentioned Danger ;-), and work on my credentials/certs. The money's out there, I just have to be willing to give up the comfort of my current situation in order to jump to somewhere new with $$$.
 

Aristippus

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 11, 2012
Messages
589
Reaction score
156
Another thing to consider. If you jump ship for more $$$ there is always the possibility that you could be taking on a job working for a company you HATE! There is something good to be said for receiving decent pay and enjoying where you work at too. Sometimes that in itself makes it worth sticking around and like Backbreaker said, sooner or later your efforts will pay off.

Good morale can be worth sacrificing a few bucks. If the going corporate raise is 3% and you've received that, yeah, maybe it isn't great, but at least you're getting a standard raise in that environment. As far as limits go. I'll give you an example. If I can say yes 4 times, I might say yes 3 times and no 1 time. Or yes twice and no twice. Sometimes I genuinely have to say no. As a general rule, I'm dependable and will also go a step above when needed. I'm just not available to do the extra stuff 100% of the time. I also ask for an occasional favor myself, as needed. There's a nice balance on both sides.
 

Jitterbug

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 12, 2008
Messages
3,230
Reaction score
143
3% is just keeping up with inflation. Not really a raise.
 

SmoothnNerdy

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 22, 2011
Messages
35
Reaction score
0
Jitterbug said:
3% is just keeping up with inflation. Not really a raise.
I agree.

Honestly, it's not about the money but it is about the money. It's more about the feeling of being valued as a result of getting a raise.

It makes me feel pretty ****ty that I turned down an offer that nearly tripled what they pay me now. It was a time for me when I had worked so hard to build a personal life in this town, and just when everything had come together, this offer came in and I was faced with having to start all over again. It could have been a great adventure or a horrible mistake but leaving back then would have meant never coming back. The work here is great, and horrible at times, but very flexible.

I don't need that money now and I make more than enough to support myself and the life style I enjoy. I guess my difficulty is dealing with the fact that all the work I put out in school doesn't mean **** because I fkd up the beginnings of my career and it's a nearly impossible to change a reputation once you have it. It's not all bad but I wish I had carried myself more professionally, even though I found the most efficient and reliable solutions for the business. So I have this "jester" kind of history with some "brains" built in. I guess the only thing to keep doing is maintain the professional attitude and not let the jester rise again :cool:
 

SmoothnNerdy

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 22, 2011
Messages
35
Reaction score
0
bradd80 said:
smoothnNerdy,

I'm still not seeing what you've done wrong. Salaries overseas may be more for certain jobs, but you're moving to a place where you don't know anybody.

I dont think you've done anything wrong at all. You're still early in your career, there is plenty more time for you to gain experience in your technical area while also learning a bit more about office politics.

As for the extra work, I agree I think you're doing too much. This is something I learned very early in my career: when you act like the most capable, intelligent person in the office, people will start to throw you all of their most complicated matters that they either can't or don't want to work on.

Often, your help will either go unnoticed, or even worse for you, management will start to praise others for work that has actually been done by you. This is one of the worst feelings you can possibly have.

To solve this, you must learn how to say no to extra work and projects. If people are throwing stuff at you, you must learn to let them know that you already have too many things on your plate as it is and you don't have the time to work on anything extra at the moment.

Learning to say no to your coworkers and even your superiors will be one of the most important work skills you ever learn.
Thanks Brad,
I cant believe I missed your post earlier. I really appreciate this.
 

jhl

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 31, 2011
Messages
122
Reaction score
7
Let me add some more words of consolation. By no means am I putting down your achievements, but if someone is paying you thrice of what you are getting now my guess is that you are serving a very specific niche market which means one of few things.

1) it's dangerous - (e.g. sending you off to a war zone or a dangerous place like the middle east)
2) your options are limited if you move outside that thrice paying job
3) if you lose that job your wage will return to average market prices
4) very limited/difficult to fill position that rarely opens up (strike when the iron is hot or lose that opportunity forever type of jobs)

The market is quite efficient when it comes to wages. If it wasn't option #4 don't feel so bad about it. Lots of these super high paying jobs are short time gigs and if it were those, you really didn't have much to lose in the long run. My guess is that most likely saved yourself headaches.
 
Top