a bit of self-doubt, would this work?

[DJHoolahoop]

hey y'all,

question here. There's this girl I am finding myself starting to like and want to get to know better. It's a friend of a friend of mine and I feel it quite wussy and AFC to ask him "hey man, do you know if she likes me?" and all that.. so I'm planning on asking this girl one day if she's single and would join me for a cup of coffee or make a day of something.

Now I was planning on saying "are you single?" and taking it from there... now I still have that AFC in me that makes me think about whether or not she's gonna bust on that instead of saying "yes, i am single"

So what do I do if I meet with resistance? I always get this feeling like I find girls who are interested in me and then I blow it by saying something other than what they were looking for.

any help?

 

[Climax]

hmm...

Well instead of asking her bluntly "are you single" you can try say something like " So (name), what u doing Tomorrow afternoon/evening? Feel like coming to lunch with me to "name of place)?

If she makes up an excuse, then she's probably not interested, unless the excuse IS genuine and she REALLY cant go, where you ask her about another time in the future and see what she has to say about that. If she is interested she will SHOW it, if not, then u know ur answer, and move on.

If she sais "yes" to you asking her to go for lunch/dinner, then you say "you dont have an over protective boyfriend that will try and come kick my ass cause I'm taking you out to lunch/dinner do you?" in a JOKING way, then you should get your answer like that, WITHOUT being blunt about it.

I personally dont have a problem with just asking the girl if she has a boyfriend, because by asking her that, u are letting her KNOW that u ARE interested in her, which is fine by me.

Good luck.


Laterz...

 

[Don Juan Hernandez]

Never ask a girl stuff directly, they have their guard up as soon as they see a male approaching, even though they know him. That is the reason why you should not let them know that you are wanting something with her. There is two way of talking to a women, the conscious, and the unconscious. The conscious is when they know what they are saying, for example, "oh, I want to go the party tonight", but they are not really wanting to go and their unconscious part says "I don't really want to go because i have better things to do". Therefore working on stimulating her unconscious part would be the best.

How could you use this?
pretty simple, talk to them in a type of dual meaning when you say something. women use that most of the time, they never say things to do directly, that is why they turn us on so quickly, the funny thing is that they don't even know they do talk to us in that certain way.(i.e. wife calling husband: "isn't it time to go to bed." meaning: "come on honey i am making a proposition to go to have sex with you." But of course we men have to work hard at it because we don't really know what she wants, we don' t even have a clue. What i am trying to say is that men and women communicate differently. Now if you want to get along with women you have to communicate like them. That is going to make you more attractive to them.

back in to technique, this works for me really good: (some time during a conversation) "yeah but i have been pretty busy lately, i haven't even had time for my self, well till this weekend actually, how about you? I would guess you have been spending time with your boyfriend."
After this she will pretty much tell you if she has a boyfriend, and if she doesn't she will also tell you if she is available on the weekend, because of the way you talked to her. This is pretty much what it meant to her in her unconscious ears: I have a chance to go out (only) this weekend, and I would like to know if you have a boyfriend.

If she says she doesn't have a boyfriend, tell her: "I think I am going to go dance and have fun, may be you would like to go." One thing to remember, women are attracted to men who like to have fun that is why you remark "I think I am going to go dance and have fun, may be you would like to go." Remember you told her unconsciously that you only have this weekend, that way it is going to be harder for her to say no, because she knows that there is only one chance with you, but only if she is interested in you.

 

[squirrels]

If she has a boyfriend, she'll bring it up. If she doesn't bring it up, even if she DOES have a man, he doesn't exist as far as you're concerned. Asking about a boyfriend is a waste of time and shows insecurity about competition.

You don't want to know if she's single. That's her business. What you want to know is if she'll join you for lunch/dinner/sex/whatever. So ASK that...and ask it in a way that she KNOWS you're opening the door to romantic possibilities. Let HER work out the boyfriend sh!t.

And as far as what do I do if I meet with resistance?

If you meet with resistance, there's no magic technique that's going to get her to suddenly change her mind and say "OK".

Why don't we go do xxxx on yyyyday? Aw c'mon it'll be fun!! You SURE?? OK then...you're gonna miss a good time though.

Don't force the sale. SHE is the one missing out by not taking you up on your offer. If anything, be persistent, ask her out on one or two other occasions. After about three times, with no counter-offer, you know she's not into you.

 

[DJHoolahoop]

I know for a fact that when I assumed the girl I was talking to had a bf, that she knew I was fishing for details. Kind of a case of, well I like this guy, but I don't want him to get like every other guy and start drooling all over me because he'll know I don't have a bf.