"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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A Bartender's Observations

Duke

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The following excerpt is from a bartender's observations about attraction and approaching. For the rest of the article, visit http://www.wsu.edu:8080/~taflinge/socsex.html

Excerpt from "Taking Advantage-- Social Basis of Human Behavior: Sex

One night, however, one of these women came up to the bar. She was one that all the men, from what I heard, had agreed was, "The best one here." She apparently needed to talk. After some small talk, I was surprised when she asked, "What's wrong with me?" I asked, "What makes you think anything is?" She told me that she goes to dance after dance. However, while all her friends that she's there with are asked to dance, she almost never is. "I'm tired of just sitting there. I want to dance, too ." I suggested that the men may be worried about her boyfriend. She asked, "Do you see a boyfriend? If I didn't go with my girlfriends, I wouldn't go out at all." When I expressed surprise that she didn't have a boyfriend, she asked how she could have one if no man asks her out? As we continued talking it became clear that, the more attractive men had found her as she got older, the less they approached her. "I got more attention from the guys when I was flat-chested and all knees and elbows," she complained. "Well, at least they talked to me," she finished. When I suggested she simply ask some guy she found attractive to dance, she looked shocked. "Are you kidding?" she asked. "He'll expect me to go to bed with him." She was probably right.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Kineti[C]harm

Master Don Juan
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I'm gonna apply for a bartender gig this fall if I get the chance :) It's one of the best PU jobs.
 
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