"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

9 minutes.

LikRetsam

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That's all I have. Time is of the essence. Dedicating a few just to realise what's going on. I'm going to step out there. I have to. I feel nervous, time is running out but I have to do it. This is a feeling I like. It's a rush... the adrenaline. The urge. No matter what comes through those doors, I must stand my ground. I'm feeling kinda weak. My stomach is making itself noticed. I'm breathing hard. I've got a goal, I know I want to reach it but at the price of such a sacrifice? I'm not so sure... Regardless, it's coming and I won't have a choice soon. Red pill? Blue pill? It's getting scary... 5 minutes left. My heart rate has increased. Knees shaking, hands trembling. Ah crap... another minute gone. I'm not looking good and I know exactly when that happened last. When a choice was coming I hadn't made yet.

In your face, her warm breath soothing you as you stare deep into her eyes. Sweat dripping from both of you as you wipe it off of each other. Hands misplaced but kindly guided where they dared never go. Thighs tightly keeping you in place as you lean against the wall. Arousal unheard of. A degree unseen. What wouldn't you do in this moment? Your finger is taken and gently taken down the chest. Shirts unbutton and eye contact ever so meaningful. One minute. Right or wrong? The rush is back, even worst. Like your first oral presentation or your first approach, you're in doubt. You're shaking... what the **** is going on... crap crap crap. I don't want to do this. But I do... oh the arousal. The desire is unbearable. Concentration maxed, you isolate your mind. No rush. No temptation. To be or not to be? In a few seconds you spend an eternity in thought. She's so beautiful... In this moment of vulnerability our hero would forsake everything he has ever learned. And this just makes it so much more exciting.

But this scene has been moving. Suddenly she's got a handle on your gun as your hands caress her bear naked ass. And you think to yourself... "I'm so horny..." Both panting, the breathing ever deeper and the heat is getting to you. Could you have ever dreamt of such a lucious scene? But still in doubt. Your body says yes, your mind says no. Time waits for no man. Our hero feels the greatest rush of his life as she leans in. In an instant the greatest decision of this young mans life is taken. To satisfy the greatest desire his body will ever generate or to honor what he thinks is right?

The choice is yours.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

TonyTheTigerOI

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I cant imagine how kissing a woman you have unbelievable chemistry with could be morally wrong. Chemistry comes from your subconcious... and I listen to it to the utmost... I dont care if my concious is scared... Im going to passionately take that girl in my arms and kiss her... and let her FEEL how I FEEL.
 

Kidd

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Originally posted by LikRetsam
Our hero feels the greatest rush of his life as she leans in. In an instant the greatest decision of this young mans life is taken. To satisfy the greatest desire his body will ever generate or to honor what he thinks is right?

The choice is yours.
Hmm..

It would depend. If such a circumstance occured, I would do what I think is right.
 

Zaine

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What is the point of posting this? Things like that are spur of the moment. One shant think in a moment such as the above, one shall act.
 

Nex

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One thing about this post is interesting:

Posts: 1337

Nerds, that's 31337. :D

EDIT:

Now I began to read what you wrote, but it made absolutely no sense to how I can apply this so I didn't bother.

Get to the point! This whole hero metaphorical crap is overused.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

Zaine

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Omfg that had me laughing like crazy....cuz that an oxymoron when talking about liktenstein.
 

LikRetsam

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Our hero has a girlfriend.

And yes, the # of posts is the whole reason =D
 
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