46 day approach journal

[Mr Real]

Hello to you all. There is a feeling of déjà vu asscoiated with this post because I signed up to the old SoSuave forum in 2005 and started an approach journal but like so many things in my life I didn't stick with it and it proved a waste of time. The reason for this journal however is that I can't waste any more time now. Hence the 46 day limit.

Why 46 days, you ask? Well it's because on May 27th I will turn twenty years of age and right now it's something that I am not looking forward to at all.

I guess I should give some background details on myself. I am a 19 year old student from Dublin, Ireland who is very shy and socially awkward. I have never had a girlfriend and have only ever been on one real date - which I made a mess of. I kissed a girl when I was 10 and haven't kissed a girl since. I have no female friends whatsoever although there are a few girls that I talk to at college. My friends are all guys and alot of them aren't the outgoing types. My Friday nights are spent watching wrestling and my Saturday nights are either spent at the pub with friends or else watching TV at home.

Needless to say, I want to get my act together!

I have tried in the past to set some goals and push myself out of my comfort zone but I tend to fall back into my old habits eventually. I have been wasting my life watching TV and being on the internet and my laziness continued the problem but I have a little over a month left to be a teenager and I'm looking to make up for all my lost time as best I can.

I am starting this approach journal because I started one on the old forum and while I didn't stick with it, it did help me out and I feel I need somewhere to document my experiences. Perhaps there are some of you out there who are in a similar position to myself and so maybe I can help you out and vice-versa. I feel like a confident man trapped inside a shy man's body and I want to let the real me out. Hence my username.

I have little time to spare so my approach journal will begin at college tomorrow. Here are some things that I intend to try out for my first day of approaching:

- Smile. I have this fear of smiling at girls that I like. I tend to carry around a poker face whilst not showing any emotion. It's as if I'm scared of people seeing me happy. Logically it makes no sense yet I still do it. Perhaps it stems from social conditioning. Some good quotes I've found:

Before you put on a frown, make absolutely sure there are no smiles available. ~Jim Beggs

Wear a smile and have friends; wear a scowl and have wrinkles. ~George Eliot

Everytime you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing. ~Mother Teresa

A smile is a powerful weapon; you can even break ice with it. ~Author Unknown

I shall endeavour to smile from here on in.

- Approach 3 girls. This might seem like too low a figure but seeing as I've not been approaching any girls, I feel it's a good start. And I don't want to try too much too soon. I intend to up the number of approaches as the journal progresses.

- Say hello to 3 people. In the course of my day I run into lots of people and yet I never say hi. Again I think it comes from social conditioning and it probably makes me seem grumpy and cold. I shall try and improve this situation.

Thanks for taking the time to read this and if you wish to offer advice as I progress my journal, you are more than welcome to do so.

The goal of my journal is simple - to get myself a girlfriend before I turn 20 and ensure that my teenage years were not a complete romantic disaster.

The 46 day countdown begins tomorrow. Cheers all.

 

[Mr Real]

Day 1

Today was Day 1 of my 46 day approach journal. My goals were as follows:

- Smile

Result - I failed on this one when around girls I found attractive. I was able to smile more around those I know at college which made me feel good but I should have done better.

- Approach 3 girls

Result - 3 approaches made

- Blonde HB7 was standing at the counter in the college restaurant waiting for toast to be made. "Takes a while, doesn't it?" I asked. She just replied "Yeah" and went on her way.

- Blonde HB8 came over and sat beside me in the seating area of the hall. I struggled to come up with something to say so some time had passed before I asked her if she knew anything about an event that's coming up. She said she didn't. I could have done better and kept the conversation going but I was pretty nervous. She left shortly after.

- Dark-haired HB8 came into the lecture late and so sat beside me. I ended up asking her about a lecture that took place last week but she didn't know what I was talking about so nothing came of it.

- Say hello to 3 people

I made an effort to say hello to the girl at the library desk, and two girls at the restaurant counter. They all said hello back.

Overall, nothing special happened today. I'm still finding my feet and I have a lot of work to do if I am to climb up the social ladder.

There's 45 days left in my journal and I'm determined to do well. My goals for tomorrow will be the same as today's.

Thanks for reading.

 

[Mr Real]

Day 2

Thanks for the tips, godsgifttowomen.^ They will prove useful, particularly the smiling tips.

Here are the results of Thursday, Day 2 of my approach journal.

- Smile

I again had difficulty smiling. I did smile at one girl I already know but I'm still struggling around girls I don't know.

- Approach 3 girls

Result: Only 2 approaches made

- Ran into a HB6 who is in one of my classes in the library. She was looking at some books. Normally I would have just walked on but I decided to go over and say hi. She seemed quite talkative but I struggled to keep the conversation going (to be perfectly honest I didn't find her attractive so I had no real desire to). I said goodbye and left.

- Ran into an American girl (about HB7) that is in another one of my classes a few hours after the girl above. Again, it was in the library (must go there more often...oh and study too!). She was easy to talk to and she even complimented me saying that she thought I made some good points to our lecturer. We were then interrupted by one of the librarians who was having trouble finding a book of hers. Maybe I'll get to talk to her again...

I could and should have made at least one more approach but I got lazy.

- Say hello to 3 people

Result: Said hello to 2 people

I was satisfied with that. I said hello to two strangers who said hello back. I feel like I'm emerging from my shell bit by bit.

I hope to do better next week when I'm back in college. I won't be there until next Tuesday I think due to Easter holidays but I hope to do as much as I can until then. Plenty of girls in other places after all.

I don't think I'll be able to do much approaches tomorrow as it's Good Friday and here in Ireland pubs are closed. I have exams on the horizon too so I'm going to try and study on Friday.

Saturday is a different story though and I hope to go clubbing with my friends that day so my next report should be over the weekend and should have approaches to report.

Thanks for reading.

 

[THIAGO BRAZIL II]

GREAT!

Your attitude encourages me to go on and just do it!