40 years old, where?

[jacques]

Hi!

I wonder if some of our "more mature" members have good tips on places to meet women in my age bracket. Of course, I can try the next mall or subscribing to a yoga course but maybe there is something better I did not think about.



FWIW, I live in Europe (Germany) and most clubs are designed for the 18-25 here, so they are not my prime option.

 

[Maverick001]

jacques,

Welcome to the forum. Have you read the DJ Bible yet? If not, go do that asap. Seriously.

As for your question, the best place(s) to meet women is where they are. That's it.

If you're comfortable in making cold approaches, starting up conversations with strangers and getting number or date closes then go do it. What are you waiting for?

If not, then do the Boot Camp and get yourself sorted out.

Cheers,
Mav

 

[jacques]

I have been lurking here for a while, actually. I have read the DJ bible and the boot camp (BTW, the link is dead).


My problem is quite simple, really. I can approach women, do a bit of ****y & funny conversation with them, etc... However, I find that the women I meet are either:
-pretty young and then either not very bright (the silly "party girl" type) or not interested. I am not very much into silly young girls myself.
-in the age range I find them more interesting (30-40), but then either ugly or married with children (or both). Demographics at work, I suppose.

Now, with the number of divorces, there must be a reasonable number of women in my age range on the market. Where do I find them?


There is very few seduction material available for the mature man. Actually, this is the only forum I found, all others appear to be designed for college aged guys.

 

[Alpine]

Sure there's less about. And when they come on the market again the good ones are snapped up pretty quick.

Try health clubs, sign up for yoga, pilates etc, network off friends, be opportunistic with people you come across in daily life.

I'd also say try the dating agencies as you can specify your criteria, not all will agree with this, but I think if you follow the DJ guidlines you will be just fine.

I feel the same sometimes, I'm 40 and feel 20. My saving grace is I don't mind mature minded 20 year olds, but then I don't mind being a perv either.

 

[jacques]

Mature minded 20 years old would be perfect. Too perfect to be true, maybe. You are making me jealous.

 

[Metaphysikal_Lover]

I hunt in book stores, coffee houses, after work happy hour joints, and night clubs that cater to older crowds. Especially ones that have bands vs DJ's.

Actually almost everywhere you go is a good place to hunt. Just open your eyes!

 

[jacques]

I haven't tried "after work happy hour joints". I am not sure we have those here. I suppose you mean some sort of reduced price bars, right?

I tried book stores and coffee houses and found them very, very disappointing. We don't have night clubs that cater to older crowds.

 

[PoloBlue]

grocery stores on a Friday or Saturday night, single women can often be found browsing the isles shopping for a few groceries. and you can tell if she's single by looking in her shopping cart, a single woma will be buying smaller containers of food, not family packs.

MALLs single women can often be found shopping alone at the mall or having a snack in the food court.

BARNES - NOBLE book stores, single women can often be found browsing books or having a coffee in Star Bucks
coffee shop.

public library lots of single women and college students in the library

pet stores lots of single women love pets and can be found at pet stores buying pet supplies

parks women taking there dog for a walk in the park

 

[jacques]

OK. Maybe I should request advice from European (or better: German) DJs only, because the situation here appears different than it is in America. As I said, I checked bookshops and was very disappointed (mainly men and old couples there). We don't have the equivalent of coffee shops. We have very few big malls (legislation made them impossible to run for the past 30 years or so). Public libraries have opening times that make them near impossible to visit for me (or anybody working actually). As to pets, the only persons I see walking dogs around here are over 70. In pet shops, women are almost always shopping with children.

If it were easy, I would not ask. This is south Germany and it has had 40 years of a policy that was designed to make married women quit their jobs and take care of their children. The typical married woman lives outside of the city (housing being a problem) and spends her day playing taxi for the kids (schools are only opened in the morning), while her rich husband drives the mercedes to work in the center of the city, where I live and work.

Of course, the conclusion would be that if I wanted to hit on married women, I should take a morning off and go buy some groceries in the suburbs. But I am not wanting to hit on married women, I'd prefer to avoid dealing with an irrate German husband if possible.

On the good sides: nobody owns firearms here...

 

[cave dweller]

try this

try matchdoctor.com

It is free.............



cave dweller

 

[jacques]

It is free, but it does not have many members from Germany (where I live).

Maybe I should have told that I tried internet dating on German sites, so this is not what I am asking for here.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

At 40 (assuming you've accomplished a few things in life) puts you in a good position for dating actually. It really comes down to what you're looking for though. If you just want to hook up and get after it then maybe the party girl is an option. If you're looking for an LTR, I'd suggest putting yourself into social environments where you can find professional women (age 30-35) who've been 'too busy' with their carreers to get married (and divorced) and have kids. It sounds to me like you're looking specifically for a single, never married, childless woman and if I don't miss my guess, younger than yourself. It's good to have standards, don't compromise them.

The reason I suggest this demographic is because it's a common gripe among women in this position that they can't find a quality man and they're at a stage of dissilusionment with some of the choices they've made. Not sure how this holds up in Germany, but it is an industrialized and westernized country. I'd suggest looking up some bars or clubs close to business centers or professional buildings and hitting them after working hours. The advantage is of course that alcohol is present whereas it's not in bookstores or coffee shops where women are not inclined to be approached. You need to be fishing where the fish are.

 

[Aztec]

Originally posted by jacques
Hi!

I wonder if some of our "more mature" members have good tips on places to meet women in my age bracket. Of course, I can try the next mall or subscribing to a yoga course but maybe there is something better I did not think about.



FWIW, I live in Europe (Germany) and most clubs are designed for the 18-25 here, so they are not my prime option.

I would personally enroll back to college for a couple of courses.

 

[Walden]

yeah , the yoga thing is good. In my town there are bars that cater to the 35+ sibngles crowd. With even basic PU skills you should be able to score like a bandit there

Good luck.

 

[jacques]

It may sound like a silly question, but how do you find bars catering to "the 35+ singles crowd"? Are there guides for such things? What are the keywords to look for?

Where I live, I can easily find bars for "the 20+ crowd", for "a complete mix from 15 to 80" (a local specialty) and for "the 30+ rich couples", but I have yet to find the sort you describe.

 

[Alpine]

Jacques,

I hope you don't mind me saying this, hopefully you will get a new outlook from it.

Every post with suggestions, you have come up with an absolutley wonderful and plausable reason why it won't work.

Now, it may be true in all cases it may not. However the vibe I get is you are focussing on why you CAN'T meet women your age rather than assuming you can.

Ever started looking at a particular car to buy, you've never noticed them before, now they are everywhere?

Same thing with women, otherwise your brain filters the wrong stuff.

I used to thing very much like you, somedays I still do, but I've found things just pop out at me when I'm in the right frame of mind.

Now with this new mindset you can:

Join a gym

Find out where you can get dancing lessons (salsa, ceroc etc)

go through the yellow pages, see what pops out at you

get involved with a local charity/community group

join a dating agency.

You make out Germany is some grey, dank dead hole in the ground devoid of 30 year old women.

If it's that fvckin bad then MOVE! but would it be the same for you where ever you go?

 

[jacques]

You are right: I tend to see problems with every solution. BUT, it is not as bad as it seems: I am able to recognise a nice woman than I see one!

The problem is: Germany IS different. Take for example the classical US advice: bookstores. I don't know how it is in the US, I suppose bookstores are packed with hot babes in the US, but here it does not work. Now imagine my disapointment...

This being said, and to show that I think a little bit more positively than you believe, I got some usable avice... elsewhere: drugstores. This is a place where one does see the type of woman I am looking for around here.

So I still hope somebody will have another good idea. Maybe a DJ from Europe who actually knows about the field here?

 

[Snatchmaster]

For ONS, try hotel bars. Bet you even find a 30-ish bar maid.

 

[Desdinova]

Get yourself a part-time job which requires you to interact with people. Get a job in a restaraunt, a salesman, or anything in which you interact with people. Use it to pick up women and you'll also get some extra cash on the side.

 

[PocoDiablo]

Get a dog.

Something short-haired and easy to take care of. Train it well, so it can do lots of tricks. Then walk it someplace close every week at the same time(s).

You'll meet plenty of women!

I have two Great Danes, so needless to say I attract plenty of attention, and that is how I met my current GF.

I met this woman who had to have her picture taken with her BF and my dogs! (We're actually good freinds now.)