jhonny9546
Master Don Juan
Hi everyone! Jhonny here.
When I think about a woman for a LTR, potentially, the mother of my children, I think there are a few qualities that should be there. Obviously, everyone has different preferences, but I suspect that if we compared our lists, we'd find quite a lot of overlap.
1) Beauty
She needs to be attractive to you. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so everyone's preferences are different.
I'm not talking about perfection or excessive maintenance.
Just someone who naturally takes care of herself, and with whom you have strong mutual sexual chemistry.
And obviously, you should be attractive to her too.
2) Emotional stability
Someone capable of dealing with difficult situations without turning everything into drama.
Losing a job, having a bad day, dealing with failure, these things shouldn't automatically threaten the relationship. She should be able to talk and also listen to you when there are problems to fix.
She can obviously need support, but she should also be capable of standing on her own.
And the same standard applies to me.
3) Your first fan
She should genuinely be your 1st fan. This is the measure for the attraction she have on You.
Not only when you're successful, but especially when you're struggling and working hard to get somewhere.
She should celebrate your wins, support you during the difficult periods, and, perhaps most importantly, be able to look at failures and ask: what can we learn from this?
That also translate into loyalty and respect.
The level of respect She has for You it's from another planet.
Again, this has to go both ways. You should be her biggest supporter too.
4) Independence
She should have a life of her own.
Friends, hobbies, interests, career ambitions, fitness, health, personal goals, something that exists beyond the relationship. Something that it's for her, and only.
(I've seen how all the women who had problematic relationships, including many women in my family, like my mother, my aunts, grandmothers, cousins, sisters, really don't have a life of their own, beyond the house, the children, and shopping.)
I think it's a huge red flag when someone's entire identity becomes their relationship.
The ideal is someone who can maintain her independence, while still being deeply loyal and committed to the relationship.
So having that independence doesn't mean she'll cheat or that will be emotionally captured by something else.
Now, here comes the most important one..
If she passed the 4, She is now qualified for a LTR, but we still need to discuss another point.. which is:
5) Shared vision of life
You can find someone who's attractive, emotionally stable, supportive and independent, and still be completely incompatible. The real question is: what kind of life do you both want?
Do you want children? How do you see marriage? Where do you want to live? How important is career? How do you handle money? What kind of family life do you want?
You don't need identical personalities or hobbies. But you need to be broadly aligned on the things that actually determine the future.
And this is where things get really difficult.
---
Looking back at the women I've known, I've met plenty who had one or two of these qualities.
Some had 1, some 3, some 4, but finding someone who combines all of them, especially emotional stability, seems extremely rare.
Look like there will always be compromises to do if you want a LTR.
So, I'm very curious to hear from you! Which are the 4 non negotiable things a woman must have to qualify for a LTR?
When I think about a woman for a LTR, potentially, the mother of my children, I think there are a few qualities that should be there. Obviously, everyone has different preferences, but I suspect that if we compared our lists, we'd find quite a lot of overlap.
1) Beauty
She needs to be attractive to you. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so everyone's preferences are different.
I'm not talking about perfection or excessive maintenance.
Just someone who naturally takes care of herself, and with whom you have strong mutual sexual chemistry.
And obviously, you should be attractive to her too.
2) Emotional stability
Someone capable of dealing with difficult situations without turning everything into drama.
Losing a job, having a bad day, dealing with failure, these things shouldn't automatically threaten the relationship. She should be able to talk and also listen to you when there are problems to fix.
She can obviously need support, but she should also be capable of standing on her own.
And the same standard applies to me.
3) Your first fan
She should genuinely be your 1st fan. This is the measure for the attraction she have on You.
Not only when you're successful, but especially when you're struggling and working hard to get somewhere.
She should celebrate your wins, support you during the difficult periods, and, perhaps most importantly, be able to look at failures and ask: what can we learn from this?
That also translate into loyalty and respect.
The level of respect She has for You it's from another planet.
Again, this has to go both ways. You should be her biggest supporter too.
4) Independence
She should have a life of her own.
Friends, hobbies, interests, career ambitions, fitness, health, personal goals, something that exists beyond the relationship. Something that it's for her, and only.
(I've seen how all the women who had problematic relationships, including many women in my family, like my mother, my aunts, grandmothers, cousins, sisters, really don't have a life of their own, beyond the house, the children, and shopping.)
I think it's a huge red flag when someone's entire identity becomes their relationship.
The ideal is someone who can maintain her independence, while still being deeply loyal and committed to the relationship.
So having that independence doesn't mean she'll cheat or that will be emotionally captured by something else.
Now, here comes the most important one..
If she passed the 4, She is now qualified for a LTR, but we still need to discuss another point.. which is:
5) Shared vision of life
You can find someone who's attractive, emotionally stable, supportive and independent, and still be completely incompatible. The real question is: what kind of life do you both want?
Do you want children? How do you see marriage? Where do you want to live? How important is career? How do you handle money? What kind of family life do you want?
You don't need identical personalities or hobbies. But you need to be broadly aligned on the things that actually determine the future.
And this is where things get really difficult.
---
Looking back at the women I've known, I've met plenty who had one or two of these qualities.
Some had 1, some 3, some 4, but finding someone who combines all of them, especially emotional stability, seems extremely rare.
Look like there will always be compromises to do if you want a LTR.
So, I'm very curious to hear from you! Which are the 4 non negotiable things a woman must have to qualify for a LTR?
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