2nd Date Tonight - Advice Appreciated

[Sun Ra]

Guys,

Last Sunday I had a date with a girl and posted a field report (seen here: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=136487). The consensus there seemed to be that I made a number of blunders. I'll buy that.

Anyway, I called the next day and said we should catch a movie next Sunday (tonight). She said she'd be up for that but she'd have to wait to see if she could find a sitter. I told her her to let me know by Thursday. Thursday rolls around and she calls and says she's 'pretty sure' Sunday will work and she 'thinks that will be fine.' I tell her I'd be happy to rent a movie and just watch it at her place if that would be easier for her; it would be cheaper for me, too, although I didn't tell her that. She says that'd be fine, and I tell her I'll try to find the crappiest movie I can. She laughs and says okay.

Now, I'm going over there later tonight at 9 o'clock, presumably after her kid is asleep. She has roommates, so they may or may not be around. My plan was to engage in heavy kissing (hence the crappy movie) and more if she's amenable, but I wouldn't want to do that if her roommates are in the same room. I think public displays of affection are fine to a point, but pretty tacky after that.

So, do you think I'm right in assume that her openness to have me over is a sign of interest, and that her willingness to watch a lousy movie indicates willingness to mess around?

Thanks

 

[romangod]

So, do you think I'm right in assume that her openness to have me over is a sign of interest, and that her willingness to watch a lousy movie indicates willingness to mess around?



Yes and No.


.

 

[Obsidian]

Yes and yes

Obviously any single mom you find will be willing to mess around, even irresponsibly. That's how she became a single mom.

But don't date single moms

 

[muscleman]

But don't date single moms

Touche. Unless you plan on becoming her baby's daddy.

 

[aliasguy]

It's really ok to "see" or "date" (if you DO "dates") single moms, contrary to the advice here.

What's NOT ok is to develop ANY relationship at ALL with her kids. Better to NEVER even meet them, if possible.

What's NOT ok is to support her financially in ANY way.

What's NOT ok is to fall into an exclusive relationship with her.

What's NOT ok is to fall for her, or see any true long-term thing for the two of you.

What's NOT ok is to knock her up AGAIN.

 

[muscleman]

^ that list of "don'ts" is the reason advice against single moms is given here. simply too many don'ts for only 1 do: sex her.

Most guys will break at least one of those above rules.

 

[Gangster Of Love]

Alright guys, where going into different theories and getting way from the original poster's question.

Yes, it is a sign of interest if she agrees to you going over to her place. That already is a good sign. It is relatively safe, in terms of you making moves, because she can decide how far it goes tonight. She can use the "my roomates are here" or the "I'm afraid my roomates will walk in" card, to keep things from escalating.

Don't go in expecting to totallys score, yet do attempt kino and escalate into kissing. If somebody else is in the room/living room, just touch as in holding her hand, or stuff you can do subtly, without others even noticing.

If she is confortable with you in that setting, and she's willing to kiss you and engage you in kino, it will be just a matter of time before she finds the time and place for you to go further. Make sure you state your interest. Don't leave without having attempted something. You are there to build confort, not to create further doubt.

With that being said, the chances of her flaking or cancelling or coming up with something are extremely high. Things just tend to happen with situations like this. Don't overreact, yet don't pretend it is no big deal. If she flakes, right away call her on it, in a half serious, half teasing kind of way and ask her how will she make it up to you.

Keep us posted.