"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

18 year old just left my house in kind of a fit

Droz88

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 19, 2012
Messages
132
Reaction score
2
Well so I started dating this 18 year old this week. I'm 24. We went out for the second time tonight and came back to my place. Started fooling around but no sex. She may be a virgin I don't know. At the end of the night I walked her to her car and she said we were moving fast and asked if I wanted a relationship. I replied "well the thing is that I'm leaving in 2 months". Right when I said this she stopped hugging me, got in her car, and left pretty much barely saying goodbye. I told her before we started dating and during our first date that i was leaving in 2 months. I just texted her and told her to have a good night and that I hope she's ok. How should i handle it from here?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

Greasy Pig

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 22, 2009
Messages
1,675
Reaction score
102
Location
Australia
I'd leave the ball in her court. You've sent her a text, she would've received it. If she's DTF before you leave, she'll respond and be receptive to your advances.

I'd say it's a sort of shyt test. Instead of being mature (virtually impossible for an 18-25 yo chick) and talking about the issue, she pretends to spit the dummy and expects you to come crawling back and placate her with compliments and gifts.

Let her have her little immature tantrum. Maybe even break her ballls over it and tease her about her bad temper. But NOT until she replies to your last text asking if she was ok.
 

Fly By Night

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 2, 2012
Messages
517
Reaction score
11
Did you actually push for sex or did you just fool around and not try to have sex? Because she told you that you guys were moving too fast when you guys were going to the car (as opposed to saying that while fooling around). She really did not seem like she wanted a relationship so she probably just wanted sex imo.

I can't really see why she would come into your place and not want anything to come out of it...
 

Trump

Banned
Joined
Mar 12, 2011
Messages
3,000
Reaction score
1,669
Droz88 said:
Well so I started dating this 18 year old this week. I'm 24. We went out for the second time tonight and came back to my place. Started fooling around but no sex. She may be a virgin I don't know. At the end of the night I walked her to her car and she said we were moving fast and asked if I wanted a relationship. I replied "well the thing is that I'm leaving in 2 months". Right when I said this she stopped hugging me, got in her car, and left pretty much barely saying goodbye. ?
Hmmm...an 18 year old girl asks you if want a relationship with her after fooling around and you tell her you are leaving in 2 months? Why the heck would you even tell a girl this at the beginning?

Dude you have to bring her in so she's absolutely 100 percent in love with you, and then decide if you want to continue to see her. Be in a position of power. You are doing her favor by seeing her, not the other way around.
 

Droz88

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 19, 2012
Messages
132
Reaction score
2
I pushed sex but she kept resisting. I finally got her to take her top off but when I started going for the pants she insisted no. I just met her on wednesday. She said we were moving too fast while in my bedroom and at her car. Yeah I totally thought she was dtf today but guess not.

Yeah well she responded and was texting me like nothing happened??? So idk my first instinct was that this was a shyt test. He last text told me to enjoy my weekend off kind of implying that she won't be seeing me. Should I reach out to her this weekend if she doesn't reach out to me?

Man she claims to have no friends and to be a loner but even a girl on her own will play these ****ed mind games?

Yes greasypig, i'll bust her balls about this next time we talk. Good suggestion!
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

Read more...

Droz88

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 19, 2012
Messages
132
Reaction score
2
Trump said:
Hmmm...an 18 year old girl asks you if want a relationship with her after fooling around and you tell her you are leaving in 2 months? Why the heck would you even tell a girl this at the beginning?

Dude you have to bring her in so she's absolutely 100 percent in love with you, and then decide if you want to continue to see her. Be in a position of power. You are doing her favor by seeing her, not the other way around.
Well I think a critical piece of info is that I already told her this before we fooled around. So in my opinion I think make this a shyt test. I think she might already be falling for me and hence that's why she asked for a relationship?

Wait so you're suggesting not saying anything about leaving in 2 months? Then after 2 months just tell her the relationship isn't working and break up?
 

Fly By Night

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 2, 2012
Messages
517
Reaction score
11
Hey sorry about that, I read your first post wrong. She seems to be saving her vag in a lame attempt to boost its value. She may crack if you persist.

I know in my personal life, there are girls who say that they will NEVER have sex before being in a relationship with the guy. But a wise man once said, If she makes you wait for it, it's never worth it.
 

BMX

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 12, 2004
Messages
1,477
Reaction score
408
Location
Everett
Wow, I'm in the opposite situation. Talking to an 18 year old who is leaving in 2 months. She keeps saying that I'm "buff" and that I must be a "bodybuilder." Yesterday she was telling me how nice my new(er) ride is and asked me how old I am. Definately DTF? Probably.

I would say like the poster above said, persist and she'll likely melt. I would not give that same advice for someone twice that age, speaking from experience.
 

flashpoint

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 28, 2012
Messages
310
Reaction score
12
may i say i am really impressed? 3-4 weeks ago you posted that you were at a major low and even recently you complained about the bad situation with your roommate and his gf. what i find impressive is how quickly you have made changes and actually did something about it. and success already begins to show. good for you. there might be setbacks but no matter what i have a pretty good feeling you'll get there eventually.
 

Droz88

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 19, 2012
Messages
132
Reaction score
2
Thank you for noticing, flashpoint. It's because I read this material every single day. At 24 and having had a pretty poor sex life the clock is ticking so it's now or never. Yes there is a setback, basically all my plates seem to be falling off. I'm gonna go out today and try to get 2-3 more numbers. The last number I got I feel I did a lot better talking to her and building comfort so yes there is success. The success, thus far, will be dependent on advice and input from guys like you. John Alexander's, "How to be an Alpha Male" has been a great help. Until proven otherwise, it is best to assume that everything in that book is true.

Back to this 18 year old...so would you guys think I should reach out to her if she doesn't reach out to me after the way our text convo ended?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

sassygirlie89

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 6, 2012
Messages
32
Reaction score
0
Location
Tipperary Ireland
But why would you bother reaching out to her if you are leaving in 2 months?? It's clear she wants more than just sex so I doubt she is going to crack knowing that you are leaving in 2 months. It's just sex you want isn't it??
 

flashpoint

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 28, 2012
Messages
310
Reaction score
12
sassy has a valid point here.

on the other hand you told her in the beginning, right? so the 2months might not be an issue. but rereading the first post you said something about "I pushed sex but she kept resisting".


that is not something you want to do. you need to warm her up first. even it seems like a sure thing, any lady needs to feel appreciated and that you dont just use her. building tension, teasin, playful one step after another. make her comfortable, make her hot, make her horny and just follow the signs. LMR is usually just an indicator of bad timing.

if you like a good read on that, i recommend David Deangelos books. google them and you find some free downloads. and if not i can pm them to you if you want. "bridges" and "sexual communication" in particular. only a few pages but i found them pretty helpful back then.

as for the situation at hand, i dunno. usually once you have gotten that far but not further the whole thing is blown. maybe i would go out and have some fun and then call her up to join. keeping it light and with no pressure. and then take it from there.
 

incognito42

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 15, 2005
Messages
505
Reaction score
14
Age
40
sassygirlie89 said:
But why would you bother reaching out to her if you are leaving in 2 months?? It's clear she wants more than just sex so I doubt she is going to crack knowing that you are leaving in 2 months. It's just sex you want isn't it??
Sassy you gave up the booty on the first 2 dates to a guy you really like who was showing signs of only wanting a piece of ass. If that guy can get in you pants, then this guy can get in her pants if she really likes him. I doubt him leaving in 2 months will stop her from giving it up if she likes him and wants dyck, and he plays his cards right
 

sassygirlie89

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 6, 2012
Messages
32
Reaction score
0
Location
Tipperary Ireland
Ehhhh but this girl doesn't want sex. I didn't say I didn't want sex with this guy. Heck the sex is great. Unfortunately I am starting to quite like this guy and the sex as well but he is giving me mixed signals. And I don't just have sex with any guy, especially if they are not great looking and I don't get on with them.

And don't try to prove your point in this post through my post. We are talking about this situation not mine. Thank you :)
 

Droz88

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 19, 2012
Messages
132
Reaction score
2
Alright well she is coming over again tonight to finish watching the movie we started yesterday. So according to flashpoint I shouldn't push sex again until I've made her feel more comfortable and appreciated? Well I doubt I'll get a response quick enought since she'll be here in less than an hour. I guess I'll back off a little tonight but I'll definitely keep up SOME physical contact to let her know i'm not just a "friend".

Edit:

Flashpoint, what you just said seems pretty contrary to all other material that i've read. I've read that if she's into you she will say "no" to your advances without really meaning it. My impression was that you should continue to push sex until she puts up a strong objection. **** I don't know what to do now.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

flashpoint

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 28, 2012
Messages
310
Reaction score
12
Droz88 said:
I guess I'll back off a little tonight but I'll definitely keep up SOME physical contact to let her know i'm not just a "friend".

geez. NO. that is a missunderstanding. by making her comfortable i v meant telling her what you like about her, body parts and so on. then you show how much you like them. just sounded like were trying to rip her clothes of and get it done. but maybe i missunderstood and did you wrong.

well she comes over to "finish the movie" ??? right we all know what that means :)
seems like she has thought about it and is ok with it. enjoy.:cheer:
 
Joined
Aug 15, 2012
Messages
85
Reaction score
5
Droz88 said:
Well so I started dating this 18 year old this week. I'm 24. We went out for the second time tonight and came back to my place. Started fooling around but no sex. She may be a virgin I don't know. At the end of the night I walked her to her car and she said we were moving fast and asked if I wanted a relationship. I replied "well the thing is that I'm leaving in 2 months". Right when I said this she stopped hugging me, got in her car, and left pretty much barely saying goodbye. I told her before we started dating and during our first date that i was leaving in 2 months. I just texted her and told her to have a good night and that I hope she's ok. How should i handle it from here?
text her in a few days
if she texts back
call her right then

make small talk
then talk about meeting up

when you meet up
try to bang her again

repeat until successful :D
 

Droz88

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 19, 2012
Messages
132
Reaction score
2
Alright well she just left. We talked a bit (got to know her more and listened), we finished the movie, I cooker her dinner, and then we started fooling around but her mom called and told her to come home so he had to leave.

Ok so you guys may rip me for supplicating but she definitely had a different vibe towards me after I cooked for her. She kissed me a lot better when we were making out. I got her shirt off effortlessly but that's when her mom called. We made no plans for later but when I walked her to her car she said "i'll see you soon". So all in all good night. I'm 100% going to go for the kill next time I see her.
 
Top