10 things three years of poverty has taught me.

[Warrior74]

The end of the year is a time for reflection, here are some of the things I learned from 3 years of poverty and being working poor.

1. Nobody is coming to save you.
- Besides family (and even my family only gives a cursory ****), nobody really cares if you make it or not if you haven't made it. Oh people will give you charity, pity, an occasional helping hand. But when the chips are down it's every man for himself and you better find a way to make a way. Nobody is coming to save you.

2. People will exploit your weak position and keep you there.
- I worked for two years with a friend, I helped grow his company and he gave me freelance work during my struggle. I was happy I could pay my bills but frustrated that I couldn't get any further. He always cried broke and that he could never pay me more. He knew I needed this job and I couldn't really go anywhere else except down. When I finally left and took a day job all of the work I built up for him crumbled and he lamented letting me go for months. We are still friends but now I consult for him. He pays me for my advice that I was giving him freely in cash and trade. Oh and he hired a guy after I left who is nearly as good as I am but pays him more because he's from a bigger market.

I had several clients who knew my situation and tried to exploit it for lower prices. LOL, I'm broke so I'm going to take LESS MONEY? How is that not an insult? I took a take it or leave it stand on my pricing and while I lost a few customers, I gained new ones at my new price point.

I secured an entry level job in my field. For the last 4 months of that job they dangled a management position in front of me to get me to keep the department running after the dept head and the assistant left for better jobs. Then they hired some 26 year old kid to be my boss and wanted me to train him. To that I said this and left them for a competing company and secured a 12k a year raise for doing the same job. Turns out I make more money now than that kid manager they brought in for me to train.

3. If you have nothing to offer women in terms of providing, you better offer something else. Bring her into your world, give her some excitement.

I'm not a buff guy. Fat & out of shape, working 12-14 hour days. Living in a small house with roommates....I'm no prize on paper. I would go on the occasional date here and there but never anything approaching the level of a plate. To be honest I was always worried about where my next dollar was going to come from and always preparing to get it. The few dates I went on that were successful, were the ones where I brought them into my world and showed them how I live. For the girls who where outside of my lifestyle it was exciting and fun. I showed them some of the seedy underbelly of the city, some hidden gems and drunken nights. That's all I could bring to the table and it was good enough to close a deal or two. I haven't had the energy or money to really be out in the game and I know my game has suffered. Even on dates I would be distracted thinking about money and bills. I had to stop dating all together.

4. I need less.
I haven't had cable, internet or even a TV in 3 years. I make it to the movie theatre once a year. I watch tv and use the internet at both of my two offices (work and freelance). I read a lot of books, ebooks and listen to free podcasts on marketing and business.

I learned to cook simple healthy meals for cheap and learned how to make them taste better. When I was in dire straights I resorted to rice, beans, oatmeal or ramen. But I'm down 20lbs with 45lbs to go.

I have a basic work wardrobe of 4 outfits and I make them work for me. I refused to spend money on clothes for every day wear. It just wasn't there to spend. Now I'm looking to start building an impressive wardrobe for the next step in my career.

I wisely choose where I spend my time and how I spend my gas. I stay home a lot. I drink less, I quit smoking as it was killing me and costing me money. I have no shame about letting well off friends buy a round or pack a bowl. I return the favor when I have money.

I don't have to have the latest and greatest toys and gadgets. I don't have to go to the best clubs and resturants. I don't have to entertain myself for hours on end. I don't need women in my life. I know the difference between needs and wants.

4. Drop Negative People. Life is hard enough.Stay Positive.
When you don't know if you're going to have enough money to pay your bills the last thing you need is some negative nancy telling you why things are shyte and why none of your ideas will work. People in the same boat or worse are the wrong people to hang out with. I cut out everyone who wasn't on my team. I started reaching out to people who are more connected and well off. They say you are the sum of the 5 people you hang out with the most. I started making those people entrepreneurs and business owners and upper management at my job.

I spent a lot of time reading the biographies, interviews and success stories of people like Bill Gates, Richard Branson and Steve Jobs. I'd read as much as possible about success and positive self talk. If I was religious I would have prayed, but I know the only person who can get me out of this mess is me so I better make myself feel some kind of hope because there is no man in the sky with my best interest at heart. When the darkness came down I always remember these words.

Stop dreaming
People who say that are blaspheming
They're doing nine to five and moaning
And they don't want you succeeding when they've blown it
And you idols - who are they?
They too dreamt about their day
Positive steps will see your goals.
Whether it's dollars or control, feel the gold.
I ain't helping you climb the ladder
I'm busy climbing mine.
That's how it's been since the dawn of time.

Unfortunately I live with some negative people. I've keep my ideas to myself and just move forward. If I want to tell them stuff, I tell them after the fact when the proof is in the pudding. I rarely come home except to sleep. I'm always in an office reading or working. When you are dead broke and struggling, your self esteem can take a hit. Negative people will kick you right in the old esteem when you're down. Cut em loose.

 

[Warrior74]

5. Poverty breeds poor choices. Be mindful.
Why do poor people smoke, or buy fast food, or have 3 or 4 baby mamas? Because when life is a grind, simple quick pleasures are all you think you'll get. You tend to think only about right now and not long term. It's hard to sit down and say to yourself, in a years time I will have a job making 35k. And in 3 years time I will make $100k and believe it. But it's easy to say, I got 20 bucks, lets go get some brews, yolo! I know that I can take that 20 bucks and put it in adwords to generate more money, or make up flyers to pass out and hustle up some cash. Or just save to build up my war chest. Long term thinking leads to better choices. Poverty does not lead to long term thinking.

6. Christmas and the holiday suck when you are broke.
This was the hardest thing for me. Not being able to see my family and friends. Not being able to participate in any social activities. Nothing to wear but work clothes, no woman on your arm. Sitting at home alone. I won't lie, I've felt like a failure every year. I remind myself that it's about family, but the holidays are the worst. I have come to loath the holiday season.

7. You learn to spot bullsh1t.
Not that my BS detector was broken before, it's just that I would entertain foolishness sometimes strictly for entertainment value. A hungry man is going to listen to your every word and look for the angles on it. He wants to know how he might get screwed or how he might get over and come up. Investing time in BS will leave you broke and hungry. You learn to weed out the fakers and wasters real quick. You don't have the luxury of entertaining BS. I've had old friends tell me that I've grow quite cold and a little machiavellian over the last few years. I don't smile and joke as much and I'm way more serious. I have to be. When things were good I didn't know how bad they could get. It's a difference between being a broke college student and a broke adult. As I said about people taking advantage, I've had offers to do all sorts of shady stuff to make money from people who knew my situation, a lot of those offers would leave me exposed to legal problems if the deal went south, of course you have to read between the lines to see that. You have to look at the worst case and ignore the best case they are presenting you with. Remember, an honest man can't be conned.

8. Women get even less regard than before.
I took the red pill a while back but every now and then with what ever plate I had, I would still feel the AFC stirring in my chest after being with a chic for a while. 3 years of pain crushed that. I have found that women are a utility to be used, and if they can't help me financially, sexually, or socially they are no good to me. Female friends...over it. Only one female has been a true friend to me during this time. As far as I'm concerned she's one of the guys. The rest disappeared when the money and partying stopped or when I didn't have time to entertain their boring chatter.

I actually have less of a problem approaching a highly attractive woman than before, but now my objective isn't sex, it's what can I get out of them. Can I get them to model, or be an actress in one of my videos? Can they make some phone calls or design something for me? Do they know someone I need to know? Can they do a favor or two for me? Hotter girls have better contacts. A lot of the business owners I've met and worked with came through meeting their secretary or assistant at social function. They are a tool to be used and occasionally bone. Maybe one day that will change but for right now I still have that hungry mentality. Women need to help me make money, not cost me money. Keeping one is like getting a pet. You're gonna have to take care of it. I rather borrow one for a while and give it back when I'm done.

Here's a funny thing about women. I can't keep one in my top ten list of things to think about during the week unless she's useful. If it's just some chic I want to date and bang....it starts looking like a hassle and I'll forget about them. If we go out and nothing happens, I don't wait for a second and third date...I just kinda forget about them. There's nothing wrong with them, it's just that average women with no obvious uses hold no interest when they aren't present. It's out of sight, out of mind. I've had women contact me for weeks before giving up because I just can't make them a priority right now. Or get pissed that I only call them on the weekend when I want to have fun. Sorry babes. This is how it is. Get in where you fit in. I got things to do.


9. Politicians and Preachers do not give a fvck about you.
I've watched people on the left and right go back and forth over issues that didn't mean much in real life to poor people like myself. It's the economy stupid. That's the baseline. If you can't fix that, you got nothing. And neither side has been helping me out much on a practical day to day level. It ain't free health care if I am required to sign up and pay for it and I can barely afford food but make too much to get it free. Fvck that. I never took a government handout when I could and should have. As working poor I made too much to qualify but not enough to survive. Fun times. Fortuantely I dated a few nurses who could get me meds and other things I needed when I needed them. Utility, make that your watch word for women in 2014.

This also applied to churches and pastors, several who I knew personally. Two that I confided in about my problems made promises to help, but of course they had to take care of their ministries first and then would try to BS me about paying me for work. They did lots of preaching about helping people but I never saw it. I started watching the so called religious leaders in my community to see what they actually do, very few walk the walk. I see a lot of hope peddling and rabble rousing but very little actual help. Especially if you are a single man. Forget it. You are on your own. I've seen them give women and children gifts and cash prizes. I've seen them pay their bills. But as a man you are expected to pull yourself up by your bootstraps. No help for you. Expecting help from the political and religious sectors is folly when you're poor.

10. Value is the only thing that matters.
Everyone wants to know what's in it for them. When I got my entry level job, I sold them on the fact that I had skills that would be valuable to the company, which was true. But I also made myself invaluable in other ways. I'd work late, come in early, do any and everything that needed to be done. No job was beneath me. You would think for a guy who was making 50k, doing a 20k job would be beneath me. Nope. I treated it like it was worth 100k. My manager used to tell me that I was too good for the job and he was right. Even at my new job, I still have the mentality to make myself indispensable will taking care to never outshine the master. All my hard work is due to the their leadership and guidance. Bosses love that shyt. I don't need credit, I need dollars and a solid work history. And while I get a lot of kudos and department wide emails extolling my virtues, I know that only my value really matters. If I cannot produce, I will not be employed. Fair enough.

The same goes with women. If you have nothing of value, what good are you? The difference is there are different things that women value. Understanding who you are dealing with and what they value is the most important thing you can do. Some women value looks, or sexual performance, or provider qualities, or just plain ole attention. Find out what they value and give it to them, they will love you for it. Just make sure you are getting what you value as well. If you value her contacts, make sure you get them. If you want sex, make sure you get it. Everything is trade. Know what you are trading for and how much you are willing to trade for it.


So what's next in 2014? Simple. I have two websites I am marketing online, one is starting to earn money, the second earned 2k last year and I want to expand it. I'm using the knowledge and experience from the last two jobs to start a new business as well that should earn 5-8k a month once it's fully underway and the sky is the limit after that. I'm learning to use other people's capitol instead of my own. I'm learning how to be a master salesman. I've nearly memorized the 48 laws of power. I'm starting a mastermind group. I'm continuing to work on being health mentally and physically and now, I need to learn how to relax. I have a hard time not working. I've lost all my hobbies and interests and now I'd like to get back to them before 2014 is out. As for women, I really can't be arsed to chase after them. Maybe later.

 

[L B]

Good stuff man. When your business do take off and you make bank, don't forget these lessons.

Stay healthy and keep up the good fight.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Warrior,
As a matter of interest,you have risen ten fold in my esteem...I know that means bvugger all,but I think you are worth knowing Mate!

 

[Colossus]

Interesting post. Glad to see you are making CFP (constant forward progress).

I'd agree with the following:

-Being broke over the holidays sucks. You feel like a failure.
-There is little and less in the way of charitable and government help for single men. In a nutshell, no one cares.
-Healthy insurance is barely affordable (with laughable coverage) even if you ARE employed.
-You can get laid as a broke guy but women will have a short attention span for you. They have to date someone better than them.
-You are only as valuable as your utility to your employer. No one is irreplaceable, and even higher level careers spit people out without notice.
-Even family will only stick their necks out so far. As a man you truly are on your own, and that is something most women can never appreciate.

 

[Bible_Belt]

You're such an overachiever that you put 11 items in a 10-item list

I've been poor much of my life, and agree with everything you said, especially the part about learning to need less. I don't know if it's a US thing, or a Western thing, but I have noticed in being outside the US that poverty does not equate to anger. Poor people in the US are mad that they are poor. But I met a lot of people in the Caribbean who were poorer than any American - no utilities, no social welfare, ten people living in a tin shack, eating breadfruit off trees and drinking from a stream. And for the most part, they were happy. Americans go on reality tv shows to see how long they can suffer through an existence that is a daily routine for most of the world.

 

[backbreaker]

That is the best post you've ever made o this site Warrior. You've come a long way. Great work. I agree with all of them especially 6 and 10. Christmas damn near made me suicidal when I was starting my first company I felt so bad. And what mistakes I make, and I made them with women, I made up because I eventually had value. Offer something, bring something to the table.



The most important thing I learned when I was dead broke is that you eat an elephant one bite at a time. I started to make real progress when I stopped setting goals, 5,10,15 year goals and budgets and all that.. it's probably just me but I don't work well like that. I work best when I can 100% concentrate on today and today's task at hand. Give my best effort today. In the gym, at work, etc. YOu string enough best effort days together and you turn around and you've made some headway.

No matter where you are, you can only get closer to what you want to do one day at a time. That was a big step for me.

 

[Poonani Maker]

I pray, even though I am Not broke/in a bind/bad off. The prayer may be simple and short like "God, please watch over me (in this)...keep me (and others) safe.." This regard for the Lord helps me be in check, cause when things are going "right" for you, then I believe you are at your most vulnerable, you MAY let down your guard, and age may help you let down your guard. I used to just be able to do things on the fly and risky things, and get away with it, and come out on the other end...while I'm still adept and pretty aware, I recognize that I am older and can MISS things that I would have seen when in my prime.

Regard for the Creator of everything is a good thing to keep you wide awake for the unexpected. There's a "golden ratio" which is one of the reasons why I believe in a Creator. The universe (so vast, just wow) blows my mind, I can't even get a grasp or grip on what's out there, can't wrap my mind around it...I mean, life survives here on Earth in the most unsurvivable (high pressure) environments (deep in the ocean etc etc)...so Why could not life exist (just floating or darting around like predators) out in space? where there is no oxygen. That stuff, just blows my noggin, but I am thankful that I am not struggling like I was all of my 20s/early 30s.

Because of that and family values (I grew up poor too), I don't Spend what everybody else would "spend" if they were in my shoes, I mean, I SEE it in my co-workers (buying a Hummer etc etc hah..so stupid). You see it everywhere all these morons buying sh!t you KNOW they can't afford. Ok, he has a wife how makes a good salary..so what? NO ONE should buy the sh!t that they're buying, especially these days when the Econ isn't EVER coming back! all these jobs (good paying jobs) that were lost in 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012...they are Not coming back! Why? Cause of technology...

Not only are THEY outsourcing American jobs (former good jobs) to India, China slave wage countries (to squeeze out extra profit for their Own raises at the higher-ups), But they are advancing tech more and more for that Same purpose, to get more and more money for Themselves and their friends ~ the already rich!

Yet the general public goes out and Buys all these new cars and Stuff...

thinking, as the media tells them, everything will be O K

Humans are becoming obsolete, pretty soon, NO ONE will have a job, and we will have nothing left to do...see Obamacare, see how the gov't is trying to make us ALL dependent on them, because They Know that humans are being replaced by machines, by the FEW, by the rich...

If you were rich, would you not want to get rid of everybody so that you could have more??? I believe that this is what is happening at the top, here and worldwide (except for countries that do not get with the American program)

 

[Warrior74]

You're such an overachiever that you put 11 items in a 10-item list

I've been poor much of my life, and agree with everything you said, especially the part about learning to need less. I don't know if it's a US thing, or a Western thing, but I have noticed in being outside the US that poverty does not equate to anger. Poor people in the US are mad that they are poor. But I met a lot of people in the Caribbean who were poorer than any American - no utilities, no social welfare, ten people living in a tin shack, eating breadfruit off trees and drinking from a stream. And for the most part, they were happy. Americans go on reality tv shows to see how long they can suffer through an existence that is a daily routine for most of the world.

Some poor people in the US. Mainly those who feel entitled for more and don't want to work for it. Usually it's jealousy. And those who weren't poor before and now are.

The Bhudda says desire is the cause of suffering, and in America desire is how you make a dollar. You amplify and exploit people's desires. You equate products with lifestyles and happiness. You get people to chase after an emotion by buying a thing (which never works, the satisfaction never lasts). I'm a marketing guy and this is the secret of marketing. We are here to pimp your fulfillment back to you in exchange for your money. In third world and second world countries they don't have an economic system designed to prey on your feelings. Hell some of them hardly have an economic system period. It's easy to be happy when you don't really know how poor you are and how rich you can be. Ignorance is bliss.

 

[Warrior74]

That is the best post you've ever made o this site Warrior. You've come a long way. Great work. I agree with all of them especially 6 and 10. Christmas damn near made me suicidal when I was starting my first company I felt so bad. And what mistakes I make, and I made them with women, I made up because I eventually had value. Offer something, bring something to the table.



The most important thing I learned when I was dead broke is that you eat an elephant one bite at a time. I started to make real progress when I stopped setting goals, 5,10,15 year goals and budgets and all that.. it's probably just me but I don't work well like that. I work best when I can 100% concentrate on today and today's task at hand. Give my best effort today. In the gym, at work, etc. YOu string enough best effort days together and you turn around and you've made some headway.

No matter where you are, you can only get closer to what you want to do one day at a time. That was a big step for me.

Yah that first year, I probably would have been tempted to pull the trigger if I hadn't sold my guns for food and gas money. That one was the hardest. I had no hope. But I got angry. At first I was angry at everyone else (blaming other people for my problems) and then at myself for letting it come to this. Anger kept me alive. It's no way I would give anyone the satisfaction of talking shyt about me killing myself.

I learned that the list is god. I make detailed lists, the main goal, each step, each substep and down to daily task to complete each substep. It's the only way I can get things done.

 

[abe0]

This sounds like the "red pill" about poverty. Good post and my best...Abe

 

[CJ 101]

Good post bra.

 

[PlayHer Man]

8. Women get even less regard than before.
I took the red pill a while back but every now and then with what ever plate I had, I would still feel the AFC stirring in my chest after being with a chic for a while. 3 years of pain crushed that. I have found that women are a utility to be used, and if they can't help me financially, sexually, or socially they are no good to me. Female friends...over it. Only one female has been a true friend to me during this time. As far as I'm concerned she's one of the guys. The rest disappeared when the money and partying stopped or when I didn't have time to entertain their boring chatter.

I actually have less of a problem approaching a highly attractive woman than before, but now my objective isn't sex, it's what can I get out of them. Can I get them to model, or be an actress in one of my videos? Can they make some phone calls or design something for me? Do they know someone I need to know? Can they do a favor or two for me? Hotter girls have better contacts. A lot of the business owners I've met and worked with came through meeting their secretary or assistant at social function. They are a tool to be used and occasionally bone. Maybe one day that will change but for right now I still have that hungry mentality. Women need to help me make money, not cost me money. Keeping one is like getting a pet. You're gonna have to take care of it. I rather borrow one for a while and give it back when I'm done.

Here's a funny thing about women. I can't keep one in my top ten list of things to think about during the week unless she's useful. If it's just some chic I want to date and bang....it starts looking like a hassle and I'll forget about them. If we go out and nothing happens, I don't wait for a second and third date...I just kinda forget about them. There's nothing wrong with them, it's just that average women with no obvious uses hold no interest when they aren't present. It's out of sight, out of mind. I've had women contact me for weeks before giving up because I just can't make them a priority right now. Or get pissed that I only call them on the weekend when I want to have fun. Sorry babes. This is how it is. Get in where you fit in. I got things to do.


9. Politicians and Preachers do not give a fvck about you.
I've watched people on the left and right go back and forth over issues that didn't mean much in real life to poor people like myself. It's the economy stupid. That's the baseline. If you can't fix that, you got nothing. And neither side has been helping me out much on a practical day to day level. It ain't free health care if I am required to sign up and pay for it and I can barely afford food but make too much to get it free. Fvck that. I never took a government handout when I could and should have. As working poor I made too much to qualify but not enough to survive. Fun times. Fortuantely I dated a few nurses who could get me meds and other things I needed when I needed them. Utility, make that your watch word for women in 2014.

This also applied to churches and pastors, several who I knew personally. Two that I confided in about my problems made promises to help, but of course they had to take care of their ministries first and then would try to BS me about paying me for work. They did lots of preaching about helping people but I never saw it. I started watching the so called religious leaders in my community to see what they actually do, very few walk the walk. I see a lot of hope peddling and rabble rousing but very little actual help. Especially if you are a single man. Forget it. You are on your own. I've seen them give women and children gifts and cash prizes. I've seen them pay their bills. But as a man you are expected to pull yourself up by your bootstraps. No help for you. Expecting help from the political and religious sectors is folly when you're poor.

10. Value is the only thing that matters.
Everyone wants to know what's in it for them. When I got my entry level job, I sold them on the fact that I had skills that would be valuable to the company, which was true. But I also made myself invaluable in other ways. I'd work late, come in early, do any and everything that needed to be done. No job was beneath me. You would think for a guy who was making 50k, doing a 20k job would be beneath me. Nope. I treated it like it was worth 100k. My manager used to tell me that I was too good for the job and he was right. Even at my new job, I still have the mentality to make myself indispensable will taking care to never outshine the master. All my hard work is due to the their leadership and guidance. Bosses love that shyt. I don't need credit, I need dollars and a solid work history. And while I get a lot of kudos and department wide emails extolling my virtues, I know that only my value really matters. If I cannot produce, I will not be employed. Fair enough.

The same goes with women. If you have nothing of value, what good are you? The difference is there are different things that women value. Understanding who you are dealing with and what they value is the most important thing you can do. Some women value looks, or sexual performance, or provider qualities, or just plain ole attention. Find out what they value and give it to them, they will love you for it. Just make sure you are getting what you value as well. If you value her contacts, make sure you get them. If you want sex, make sure you get it. Everything is trade. Know what you are trading for and how much you are willing to trade for it.

Golden thread. The stuff in RED really spoke to me.

I totally related to #8 and I've never actually been in poverty.. however I had a strong fear of poverty from 2009-2011 and that fear lead me to doing and learning a lot of things I otherwise wouldn't have.

But men really need to size women up based on value and looks alone don't equal value. If a woman isn't making your life better she is a waste of time. If she is making your life worse she needs to be cut off no matter who she is or how long you've known her. Time is precious. Life is short.

Regarding politics and religion.. they are both scams created by the rich and powerful to control the poor and stupid. This has been true since their inception. That's why I don't promote any political party or religion when I post EVER.

 

[AAAgent]

I went through similar experience as you did Warrior and also got the same results. I was working a 40k job but putting in 60-70 hours a week when i was only required to work 40hours. First one in and last one out. Did everything and anything and told my boss i was appreciative of everything he gave me and i wouldn't have learned so much if it wasn't for him(I learned everything mostly myself but was grateful for him hiring me).

However……

After 4 years of working, and 5 years of recovery from being poor/alone i've gotten myself into a situation that isn't exactly the greatest. I've been promoted and make almost double my salary. I'm 10x smarter and extremely confident in myself. I have money and confidence and am no longer humble (at least my humbleness is not comparable to what it was when i was poor). I have this chip on my shoulder that i feel like most people won't be able to understand what i had to go through to make it here (I feel better than everyone because i've put so much time and effort to make myself better while these people fvcked around). I talk down to people and think everyone is stupid. Funny thing is, i'm usually right that i know more than these people but it definitely doesn't help in making friends. My lack of humbleness also reflects in my lack of patience. My sometimes brash actions and comments have led to complications with senior management.

My advice, be careful not to get this chip on your shoulder. Stay hungry, and stay humble. I've made tons of enemies with this chip on my shoulder. My career has pretty much been at a standstill for 1.5 years because i'm not able to get along as well with people. It's gotten better now that i've started to notice it though.

 

[Desdinova]

Great fvcking post. Here's my experiences with it all...

1. Nobody is coming to save you.

I learned this one years ago. When you get kicked down and 5hit all over, people are just going to walk around you and say "phew!" when they smell all the 5hit you're in. Nobody reaches out to wash off the 5hit, put bandages on all your bleeding wounds, nor extends a hand to help you get back up. You've gotta do it all yourself.

2. People will exploit your weak position and keep you there.

"Ah! A doormat! I now have something to help remove the dog **** I stepped in. So glad I have this doormat to help me out in times like this."

3. If you have nothing to offer women in terms of providing, you better offer something else. Bring her into your world, give her some excitement.

It's all based on her emotional fluctuation. IMO, providing is less valuable to a woman than emotional fluctuation. How many times will a woman choose a jobless bum over a successful entrepeneur just because he makes her emotions go crazy.

4. I need less.

There are only three basic things you need: food, water, and shelter. Everything else is a luxury.

4. Drop Negative People. Life is hard enough.Stay Positive.

It's much easier to be positive when you have NOBODY in your life as opposed to keeping negative people around. Problems occur when your family members are negative. When that happens, keep them at a distance.

5. Poverty breeds poor choices. Be mindful.

Macaroni and cheese is less than $1 per box. Unfortunately, it has little to no nutritional value.

6. Christmas and the holiday suck when you are broke.

Agreed 100%. No matter how much you avoid society's implications of the holidays, it's going to be everywhere and it's been implanted in your mind from childbirth that it's a special time of year. All that generousity that goes on during the holidays is mostly movie-based.

7. You learn to spot bullsh1t.

When all you're looking out for is #1, this is a means of protecting what you have.

8. Women get even less regard than before.

Women want something that requires little work. If you're damaged and in dire need of restoration, they have little use for you.

9. Politicians and Preachers do not give a fvck about you.

They're only out to look for themselves, their position of power, and their paychecks. The government does what it needs to make their pockets fatter regardless of how much they screw the little guy. If you're homeless, you quality for free services which makes the government look good. If you're just above homeless, you're taxable.

10. Value is the only thing that matters.

Everyone wants something with value. It's in our nature. It's in the nature of others.

Warrior, if there's one book I could recommend for you to read, it would be "The Art and Science of Dumpster Diving" by John Hoffman. This guy really goes into what it means to be self-sufficient. It's absolutely amazing how he thrives on the wastefulness of society. It's a fantastic read, and I highly recommend it.

With regards to my job, all I desire is more "me" time. The more "me" time I get, the better. I may not make a ton of money, but I have lots of time to spend on my hobbies, and that means much more to me than having a huge house, a nice car, and tons of gadgets that I'd have little time to enjoy because I work too damn much.

 

[Scormus]

Great fvcking post. Here's my experiences with



It's all based on her emotional fluctuation. IMO, providing is less valuable to a woman than emotional fluctuation. How many times will a woman choose a jobless bum over a successful entrepeneur just because he makes her emotions go crazy.

Des - can you give me some specific examples of creating the emotional fluctuation that will get me better results with my plates?

I know well enough to stamp out anything an AFC would do. I take my time responding to texts or calls and I don't come on strong. I know to escalate physically and go for the bang ASAP. What else helps?

Re: provider helping or not, based on my own experience what can help is not being or appearing to be a good provider per se, but to have the status that money can buy, e.g. nice car, nice house. These things cause one to be seen to be attractive to other women. If a woman thinks that objectively you shouldn't have any problem replacing her (nice car and house help) it makes things do much easier.

They don't care about provisioning ability directly but they want a man who is seen as desirable to other women and the trappings can help.

Sorry to drag it off topic a bit.

Yes they will choose the jobless bum sometimes though - what's up with that, is it the guy has the height and looks that his situation doesn't matter?

 

[VladPatton]

Fantastic post, and I agree with everything you mentioned. All the best to you for 2014, man.

 

[user43770]

Warrior, I've kept up with your situation and it's great to see you coming out of it a better man.

Tough times make us stronger.

 

[jafyk]

5. Poverty breeds poor choices. Be mindful.
Why do poor people smoke, or buy fast food, or have 3 or 4 baby mamas? Because when life is a grind, simple quick pleasures are all you think you'll get. You tend to think only about right now and not long term. It's hard to sit down and say to yourself, in a years time I will have a job making 35k. And in 3 years time I will make $100k and believe it. But it's easy to say, I got 20 bucks, lets go get some brews, yolo! I know that I can take that 20 bucks and put it in adwords to generate more money, or make up flyers to pass out and hustle up some cash. Or just save to build up my war chest. Long term thinking leads to better choices. Poverty does not lead to long term thinking.

6. Christmas and the holiday suck when you are broke.
This was the hardest thing for me. Not being able to see my family and friends. Not being able to participate in any social activities. Nothing to wear but work clothes, no woman on your arm. Sitting at home alone. I won't lie, I've felt like a failure every year. I remind myself that it's about family, but the holidays are the worst. I have come to loath the holiday season.

7. You learn to spot bullsh1t.
Not that my BS detector was broken before, it's just that I would entertain foolishness sometimes strictly for entertainment value. A hungry man is going to listen to your every word and look for the angles on it. He wants to know how he might get screwed or how he might get over and come up. Investing time in BS will leave you broke and hungry. You learn to weed out the fakers and wasters real quick. You don't have the luxury of entertaining BS. I've had old friends tell me that I've grow quite cold and a little machiavellian over the last few years. I don't smile and joke as much and I'm way more serious. I have to be. When things were good I didn't know how bad they could get. It's a difference between being a broke college student and a broke adult. As I said about people taking advantage, I've had offers to do all sorts of shady stuff to make money from people who knew my situation, a lot of those offers would leave me exposed to legal problems if the deal went south, of course you have to read between the lines to see that. You have to look at the worst case and ignore the best case they are presenting you with. Remember, an honest man can't be conned.

8. Women get even less regard than before.
I took the red pill a while back but every now and then with what ever plate I had, I would still feel the AFC stirring in my chest after being with a chic for a while. 3 years of pain crushed that. I have found that women are a utility to be used, and if they can't help me financially, sexually, or socially they are no good to me. Female friends...over it. Only one female has been a true friend to me during this time. As far as I'm concerned she's one of the guys. The rest disappeared when the money and partying stopped or when I didn't have time to entertain their boring chatter.

I actually have less of a problem approaching a highly attractive woman than before, but now my objective isn't sex, it's what can I get out of them. Can I get them to model, or be an actress in one of my videos? Can they make some phone calls or design something for me? Do they know someone I need to know? Can they do a favor or two for me? Hotter girls have better contacts. A lot of the business owners I've met and worked with came through meeting their secretary or assistant at social function. They are a tool to be used and occasionally bone. Maybe one day that will change but for right now I still have that hungry mentality. Women need to help me make money, not cost me money. Keeping one is like getting a pet. You're gonna have to take care of it. I rather borrow one for a while and give it back when I'm done.

Here's a funny thing about women. I can't keep one in my top ten list of things to think about during the week unless she's useful. If it's just some chic I want to date and bang....it starts looking like a hassle and I'll forget about them. If we go out and nothing happens, I don't wait for a second and third date...I just kinda forget about them. There's nothing wrong with them, it's just that average women with no obvious uses hold no interest when they aren't present. It's out of sight, out of mind. I've had women contact me for weeks before giving up because I just can't make them a priority right now. Or get pissed that I only call them on the weekend when I want to have fun. Sorry babes. This is how it is. Get in where you fit in. I got things to do.


9. Politicians and Preachers do not give a fvck about you.
I've watched people on the left and right go back and forth over issues that didn't mean much in real life to poor people like myself. It's the economy stupid. That's the baseline. If you can't fix that, you got nothing. And neither side has been helping me out much on a practical day to day level. It ain't free health care if I am required to sign up and pay for it and I can barely afford food but make too much to get it free. Fvck that. I never took a government handout when I could and should have. As working poor I made too much to qualify but not enough to survive. Fun times. Fortuantely I dated a few nurses who could get me meds and other things I needed when I needed them. Utility, make that your watch word for women in 2014.

This also applied to churches and pastors, several who I knew personally. Two that I confided in about my problems made promises to help, but of course they had to take care of their ministries first and then would try to BS me about paying me for work. They did lots of preaching about helping people but I never saw it. I started watching the so called religious leaders in my community to see what they actually do, very few walk the walk. I see a lot of hope peddling and rabble rousing but very little actual help. Especially if you are a single man. Forget it. You are on your own. I've seen them give women and children gifts and cash prizes. I've seen them pay their bills. But as a man you are expected to pull yourself up by your bootstraps. No help for you. Expecting help from the political and religious sectors is folly when you're poor.

10. Value is the only thing that matters.
Everyone wants to know what's in it for them. When I got my entry level job, I sold them on the fact that I had skills that would be valuable to the company, which was true. But I also made myself invaluable in other ways. I'd work late, come in early, do any and everything that needed to be done. No job was beneath me. You would think for a guy who was making 50k, doing a 20k job would be beneath me. Nope. I treated it like it was worth 100k. My manager used to tell me that I was too good for the job and he was right. Even at my new job, I still have the mentality to make myself indispensable will taking care to never outshine the master. All my hard work is due to the their leadership and guidance. Bosses love that shyt. I don't need credit, I need dollars and a solid work history. And while I get a lot of kudos and department wide emails extolling my virtues, I know that only my value really matters. If I cannot produce, I will not be employed. Fair enough.

The same goes with women. If you have nothing of value, what good are you? The difference is there are different things that women value. Understanding who you are dealing with and what they value is the most important thing you can do. Some women value looks, or sexual performance, or provider qualities, or just plain ole attention. Find out what they value and give it to them, they will love you for it. Just make sure you are getting what you value as well. If you value her contacts, make sure you get them. If you want sex, make sure you get it. Everything is trade. Know what you are trading for and how much you are willing to trade for it.


So what's next in 2014? Simple. I have two websites I am marketing online, one is starting to earn money, the second earned 2k last year and I want to expand it. I'm using the knowledge and experience from the last two jobs to start a new business as well that should earn 5-8k a month once it's fully underway and the sky is the limit after that. I'm learning to use other people's capitol instead of my own. I'm learning how to be a master salesman. I've nearly memorized the 48 laws of power. I'm starting a mastermind group. I'm continuing to work on being health mentally and physically and now, I need to learn how to relax. I have a hard time not working. I've lost all my hobbies and interests and now I'd like to get back to them before 2014 is out. As for women, I really can't be arsed to chase after them. Maybe later.

I'm going through a rough patch right now and I can really relate to this post. Thank you for being courageous enough to share it.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

I can relate to so much on this. Great post.

The poverty thing, yes I've been there, but luckily for me I've had some help from others. It's been limited, but just enough to keep me from the homeless shelter.

Let me comment on one of your sections:

3. If you have nothing to offer women in terms of providing, you better offer something else. Bring her into your world, give her some excitement.

I'm not a buff guy. Fat & out of shape, working 12-14 hour days. Living in a small house with roommates....I'm no prize on paper. I would go on the occasional date here and there but never anything approaching the level of a plate. To be honest I was always worried about where my next dollar was going to come from and always preparing to get it. The few dates I went on that were successful, were the ones where I brought them into my world and showed them how I live. For the girls who where outside of my lifestyle it was exciting and fun. I showed them some of the seedy underbelly of the city, some hidden gems and drunken nights. That's all I could bring to the table and it was good enough to close a deal or two. I haven't had the energy or money to really be out in the game and I know my game has suffered. Even on dates I would be distracted thinking about money and bills. I had to stop dating all together.

I'm not a buff guy. Fat & out of shape, working 12-14 hour days.

Why do you not workout?? Why? This is the one thing that I have total control over. Me, my body. 4 hours a week is all it takes. I can have the most stressed out, $hit filled day. All I want to do is drink a bottle of whiskey then smash it over my face. Then I go to the gym...and I feel 100% better. Endorphins aside, it's time for me to be alone, get a sweat going, get the heart pumping a little bit, and get the negative energy out. Plus, I'm making myself look good. I feel good. It's the one thing, if nothing else, that I can take pride in. You seem like a determined guy, if you find yourself in the bay area, hit me up, I'll show you the way to the gym.

The few dates I went on that were successful, were the ones where I brought them into my world and showed them how I live. For the girls who where outside of my lifestyle it was exciting and fun.

^^^gold. I try to preach this. fvck em. This is who I am, take my hand and I'll show you the way. If you don't like it, there's the door, you're free to leave anytime.

Alpha to the core.