"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

Ambigious letter - proper response?

L

Leporello

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 18, 2003
Messages
955
Reaction score
13
Location
DC
Contacted a girl on a college dating site a few weeks ago. She responded immediately and we've been trading e-mails daily since then. We're into alot of the same things, she has ideas for restaurants we could go to and the possibility of us 'clicking'.

Then today, after the usual banter she writes:

"OK, sorry to bring this up, but what exactly were you looking for? dating
or friends too..?"

She's never mentioned having a boyfriend or not being into guys (and she WAS on a dating site 'seeking a man') but you never know.

Advice?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

O

onthepath

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 3, 2005
Messages
136
Reaction score
1
Location
Rochester, NY
Leporello said:
but what exactly were you looking for? dating
or friends too..?"
Click to expand...
if you've been trading emails for weeks now and yuo're interested in her step it up and meet her in person
 
L

Leporello

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 18, 2003
Messages
955
Reaction score
13
Location
DC
onthepath said:
if you've been trading emails for weeks now and yuo're interested in her step it up and meet her in person
Click to expand...
That was my intention this weekend. In my last e-mail to her I mentioned a place I wanted to go with her and got this response.
 
O

onthepath

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 3, 2005
Messages
136
Reaction score
1
Location
Rochester, NY
then perhaps try any response that makes your intentions clear without sounding too boring or lame

meet me at here at x and find out for yourself ;)
and wear something nice
 
L

Leporello

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 18, 2003
Messages
955
Reaction score
13
Location
DC
It annoys me that she asked that question without giving a hint of her own feelings.

UNLESS she just wants to be sure this is a date and not just a hangout, though given my luck i doubt it.
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

Read more...

A

aliasguy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 10, 2007
Messages
757
Reaction score
5
This chick wrote you THIS????:

"OK, sorry to bring this up, but what exactly were you looking for? dating
or friends too..?"



It's not clear, and we don't even know what she really means, do we?


CALL her back ... ask her what the hell she's TALKING about ... do it smooothly and nicely. And DON'T answer her question!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


You are clearly in the driver's seat, here, and if you do it RIGHT, you'll win big.
 
L

Leporello

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 18, 2003
Messages
955
Reaction score
13
Location
DC
OK, I was thinking something along the lines of:

"I want to meet new people, and you seem pretty cool. How about you?"
 
O

onthepath

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 3, 2005
Messages
136
Reaction score
1
Location
Rochester, NY
Leporello said:
OK, I was thinking something along the lines of:

"I want to meet new people, and you seem pretty cool. How about you?"
Click to expand...
truth be told, i dont think you could stuff it up too badly with whatever you say

if youve been conversing for several weeks daily then its unlikely that she'll want to stop all contact

i think you should just go with it
 
S

smooth guy

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 15, 2007
Messages
306
Reaction score
3
"why are you interested?"
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

Read more...

L

Leporello

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 18, 2003
Messages
955
Reaction score
13
Location
DC
Damnation.

I wrote "As for what am I looking for, I'm looking to
meet new people, and you seem really cool. What about you?"

She responded "I just assumed you'd be looking for a date, and I didn't make it clear in the beginning that I'm just looking for friendship. but anywho, you seem cool too- I mean, you're a music dork, and people can't get much cooler than music dorks :)"

Bah

Edit: Oh yeah, what's the deal with so many chicks on dating sites not looking for a date? This was the first time in years I'd tried to use the net to game girls, but as I recall it was exctly the same back then.
 
C

Craig_87

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 5, 2006
Messages
43
Reaction score
0
you shouldnt have answered tbh......but hey,, its not all bad ....shes teasing you "Music dork".......meet up and im sure youll click.....probably likes you, bu doesnt want to appear slutty
 
Bible_Belt

Bible_Belt

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 27, 2005
Messages
17,586
Reaction score
6,368
Age
50
Location
midwestern cow field 40
Contacted a girl on a college dating site

"I just assumed you'd be looking for a date, and I didn't make it clear in the beginning that I'm just looking for friendship. but anywho, you seem cool too- I mean, you're a music dork, and people can't get much cooler than music dorks "

That fvcking AW. Why is she on a dating site looking for "friends?" Call her on her bvllsh!t, that's what women want. But do it in a fun joking way.

And a woman who will say she just wants a "friend" will still have sex with you if you play your cards right. She could just mean that she is scared of having some clingy wuss guy bothering her all the time. This is what I hear when women say they want a friend. I just assume that I still get to have sex with her. If, after I have done my best - demonstrate value, make her laugh, kino, isolate, and kiss test, and then she turns her head or pushes me away when I go to kiss her (it happens :) ), then that means that she only sees you as a friend, because it's an action. Words mean nothing.
 
I

Interceptor

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 25, 2007
Messages
2,609
Reaction score
135
Location
Florida
Classic sh*t tests, gentlemen.


There you have it. Right there.


You want her, Leo?

Go get her.
Her words are her screen.
You're a Man of Action.
You take what you want.
Take her.
She wants to be taken by someone.
Why not you?

Don't be put off and think you're defeated.

march on.

Go get'em, Tiger.
 
K

ketostix

Banned
Joined
Feb 10, 2005
Messages
3,871
Reaction score
55
Yeah you should've mostly ignored her original question, or replied with something like, " Wouldn't you like to know". Anyway you shouldn't have fell for the bait or went down that discussion thread imo. You should jut meet up with her and escalate and take it from there.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

S

smooth guy

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 15, 2007
Messages
306
Reaction score
3
Well, my ex used to tell me I was her "best friend" but she still gave IOI so I followed my instinct and started to pursue her. She only said that because she thought I didn't feel the same way. So I wouldn't always trust the friends speech.

And.. she hasn't met you. How can she judge so early? You know people are and feel different in real life than behind a monitor.
 
J

James Bondage

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 20, 2005
Messages
92
Reaction score
0
Location
England
"I just assumed you'd be looking for a date, and I didn't make it clear in the beginning that I'm just looking for friendship. but anywho, you seem cool too- I mean, you're a music dork, and people can't get much cooler than music dorks "

This is how I perceive it. Sorry to bring you the harsh, cold reality (or at least how I see it), but that's what this site is meant to be all about, right?

I think she is on there to look for dates, she's just not interested in you and has relegated you to the friend zone. Otherwise, she wouldn't declare to you that she's 'just looking for friendship'.. she is trying to let you down gently IMO.

Best thing to do is look elsewhere for some action.. by all means keep in touch as friends if you want but it'll be an uphill struggle if you want anything more. There's so many more women out there, why waste all your effort on this one?
 
L

Leporello

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 18, 2003
Messages
955
Reaction score
13
Location
DC
Actually, I just checked and her profile has been taken down.
 
F

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,481
Reaction score
65
Location
Galt's Gulch
Leporello said:
Contacted a girl on a college dating site a few weeks ago. She responded immediately and we've been trading e-mails daily since then. We're into alot of the same things, she has ideas for restaurants we could go to and the possibility of us 'clicking'.

Then today, after the usual banter she writes:

"OK, sorry to bring this up, but what exactly were you looking for? dating
or friends too..?"

She's never mentioned having a boyfriend or not being into guys (and she WAS on a dating site 'seeking a man') but you never know.

Advice?
Click to expand...
Until the two of you stop being pen pals and actually get together there is no definitive way to tell if she's interested or not (you need to find out too).
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
Top