Rollo Tomassi said:

And I'm saying, you wont have an LTR without sex. I assume POTATO is presently ƒucking his GF on a regular basis. Would this still be the case were she to permanently stop doing so? Again, I'm not trying to de-emphasize the other aspects, I'm pointing out that sex is the dealbreaker. The difference between a good friend and a lover is that you're having sex with the lover. That's the difference between a best friend and an LTR. The OP was what made for a "successful" LTR.

Click to expand...

Yeah, but I guess they were going off of what you SAID, not what you meant. Noone is going to dispute that sex is important in a LTR.

Rollo Tomassi said:

God, that reads so poetic coming from a girl who started a thread regarding her frustrations about having one of her girlfriends c0ckblock her with a guy she was really wanting to ƒuck at a bar one night.

Click to expand...

Hmmm... I don't think that is what that particular thread was about. But good one , referencing something that has nothing to do with the topic of hand, just to incite I dunno... anger, defensiveness? It also helps that you twisted it and added your own little spin as well...

Way to go, Mod.

Rollo Tomassi said:

Say that sex is the lynchpin of an LTR and you're "shallow", but play up the esoteric and you're a philosopher.

Click to expand...

Agreed.

Now before anything let me say that I respect your opinion, Rollo.. in fact I have several of your posts bookmarked for inspiration. But you do have a tendency to provide very black and white advice (ALWAYS do this and NEVER do that)

I find it just a bit ironic that someone with such "Iron Rules" bends his own opinion in the span of one thread.

First is the extremist view:

To answer your other question, it's sex first then friendship.

Click to expand...

Then you bend:

And I'm saying, you wont have an LTR without sex.

Click to expand...

I'm not attacking you at all, just pointing out a small inconsistency.

This is definitely a charged subject, so I understand the emotions involved, but lets have this dialogue as adults, shall we?

(That goes for all of you flame-baiters too)

Rollo Tomassi said:

If you encountered a woman who fit every ideal you ever had for a relationship - best friend, loving, 100% loyal, excellent mother, came from a great family, perfect HB 10, healthy both mentally and physically - who loved you unconditionally and wanted to marry you, but with one caveat; she would NEVER have sex with you under any circumstances, would you marry her? You could have children together through insemination and she would be platonically affectionate with you, knowing full well before you did and pledging to be completely faithful yourself, would you spend the rest of your life in a completely sexless marriage with an otherwise ideal woman?

Click to expand...

Only an AFC would do such a thing

Last Man Standing said:

Clarify your question.

Click to expand...

Sorry I misread what you were saying.

I think that Rollo has it backwards. From my point of view I have sex with my girlfriend, or pretty much with every woman that I’ve had sex with because we have a relationship – not the other way around.

With the mother of my children we had very good sex, often two or more times a day up until the day we split up. The sex was never enough to make up for underlying incompatibility issues. With my current girlfriend a couple of years ago we broke up. During our breakup I carried on and was having sex with other women. What ultimately led me back to my girlfriend was the realization that the connection that we had, that understanding of each other was what mattered most, it’s an understanding that you don’t find everyday.

We have an agreed to open relationship that in practice is more of a “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy. We came to the agreement after realizing that the magic or whatever it is that is between us is more important to us than whatever sexual desires we might have.

Rollo Tomassi said:

I assume POTATO is presently ƒucking his GF on a regular basis. Would this still be the case were she to permanently stop doing so.

Click to expand...

If, for instance, she were to become paralyzed, I wouldn’t abandon her.