Sup.
I took almost half a year off from dating - after crazy ammounts of ***** during spring/early summer I felt kinda exhausted with hedonism and decided to take a break. Long story short got bored because (potentially controversial opinion coming) I'd rather fap it out in 15 minutes and get back to work or enjoying sports and my hobbies rather than spending countless evenings swiping on apps and meeting women. I only allowed myself to sleep with one old fwb once per 1-2 months, but other than that I focused on myself over going out with random sluts.
A month ago decided I'm gonna look around for any potentially good candidates for an LTR, so the hunt resumed in a calm matter.
So, last weekend met this turkish girl (around 8 lookswise) from Bumble. Idk if Bumble in the US is used in more similiar fashion to Tinder or Hinge so I don't think that plays a role here.
Additional info, both her and me are 24. She's a student who moved here 4 months ago from her home country, I left my uni without degree and am working in a field I'm happy with. Also, Central/Eastern Europe (women on average
slightly less broken here than in the west imo).
Obviously, this was only a first meeting so only a little bit of a character was uncovered, seeing her this Saturday again.
Imma do the sections to keep it clear
Green flags
- Smart, educated (degree/work experience in multiple STEM fields)
- Impressively similiar hobbies/interests (honestly, first time in a long time I shared so many interests with a woman)
- Follow up to above, in few hobbies (such as singing) where she's more advanced than me she immidietly offered to help me with some stuff - I get it as offering investement, hence green flag
- Offered to pay multiple times and got few drinks on herself
- Seemingly not addicted from social media
- Good relationship with siblings and family
- Declared never using any drugs other than trying weed few times but not enjoying it
- Does some sports, namely swimming...
Yellow Flags (unsure how to interpret)
- ...but says people who spend time doing aesthetics focused sports are pretty much always dumb (said in the context of gym) (she has ~5kg too much for her height although still looking good)
- When asked about what's her type couldn't specify beyond "intelligent" which is as cliche as it goes
- Says she's a feminist but not a western type (talked about how women's rights in Turkey are pathetic), no clue whether she's actually doing any social activism or other bs
- Declared herself as a less of an emotional thinker (Yes yes, I know lmao. And red flags makes this sound like a lie)
- Was only in a single 2 years long relationship (she said her bf cheated on her - obviously no clue whether it's true)
Red Flags
- Already on pills
- She was the one pushing for sex after I told her it's late and it's time to go to home and get some sleep. Explanation: told her I'm tired, she asked again less subtely this time that she'd like to come over to me, told her that my place is off the limits (it was nasty af, planned to do grand cleaning on the next day lol), she invited me to her place because she really liked me. I asked her if she says that to every Bumble guy, she got mad and I had to calmly and slightly coldly explain that I really don't like how she knows it was a joke but is trying to use it agaisnt me. Ended up ordering uber for us and taking me her to her rented room.
- In a follow up to previous one and last of Yellow Flags, suspiciously good in bed (despite N count of ~30 never seen a woman try the "born girl squatting on a dik" position and not fail, especially drunk). Also, dirty talk and even some stuff like "cam in me baby"
- smokes
Had some drunken sex at her place (boy it was 4am I was trynna survive and calm her down so I can get some sleep lmao, in top5 funniest ons from my perspective I had). Slept there, morning was really sweet - listening to music, hugging all the stuff. She wanted me to stay longer but I left ~1,5-2h after waking up.
Over past few days had 2, mostly logistical conversations (I'm not huge on writing with people and she seems similiar in this aspect) - she did show investement "I'll be happy to go there WITH YOU" etc. As mentioned earlier, I'll be meeting her this Saturday, soberly this time
Not sure about her social situation rn, she did mention having some university friends and going out with them to bars sometimes on weekends, no club nights since she doesn't like them - hard to really come up with anything to take away from this
Yes, I am 99% sure she's been having her hot girl foreign country adventures, no clue about the ammount of these. When asked about experience with Bumble she said she only had good experiences (yeah we all know what that usually means). The 2nd red flag is pretty significant, taking that out of equation she did seem in the range of 'fine, requires slight vetting'.
I'm interested to hear whether in your eyes that's too big of a no no or is it something that can be solved by proper vetting. Or perhaps there is that 1% chance that I really worked my magic that well that night and it was a first situation like this for her (was on pills since last LTR). Lmao
Oh yeah and no worries, I'm meeting another promisingly looking girl on monday. Not getting oneitis that's for damn sure.
Cheers everyone
