Women are repelled by attractive men with good self-esteem.

[Pumax]

Have any of you experienced women who were clearly attracted to you, but at the same time seemed to think you were "out of their league," too attractive, or otherwise not someone they felt comfortable pursuing for a relationship, just because, for example, maybe she's looking for a guy who constantly validates and chases her, while you're the most attractive guy she'd actually like to be with, but you have that self-respect, you don't chase, so she feel with less power about that.. that makes her insecure to have no power over you.

So instead, she ends up with a less attractive guy who gives her constant attention (or anything else she looking for).

What I've noticed is that, in these situations, they often don't reject you outright because they're still attracted to you.
It's like they want to reject you but they can't maaan..They know they can't, so, instead, they seem to play ego games and put you through endless "**** tests." Sometimes they even do this while they're already in a relationship with someone who constantly chases them, even though they know they find you more attractive. It almost feels as if your confidence and self-respect make them uncomfortable, so they resort to mind games instead.

The biggest thing I've noticed is that whenever other women start showing interest in you, these women suddenly do everything they can to get in the way or pull your attention back to themselves.
In cases like this, it seems as though they're getting validation from their boyfriend or husband while also seeking attention from the men they believe are beyond their reach.

This is one reason why someone once told me to approach genuinely beautiful women, the "9s" and "10s", because, in their opinion, women considered "6s," "7s," or "8s" were more likely to behave this way due to insecurity and a perceived imbalance in attractiveness.

So they say, go for the most beautiful ones and you will not regret.

I think this comes from the idea that there may be something that puts attractive people in a strange position, where they're hated by men who perceive them as a threat, and also by women because they know they can't have the same influence over them that they could have with other men.

Has anyone else experienced something similar?

 

[Solomon]

I think this is what it comes down to: Some women know there are certain men they can’t manipulate or get away with bad behavior around. There are men women can control and then there are men who hold them accountable.

A lot of women don’t like that.
This is part of the reason you see women with “bad boys.” It’s not just the excitement and tingles. Often these women are “bad” themselves. Stable, high self-esteem men are less tolerant of drama, so those women self-select elsewhere.

A second part of it is this: A woman who’s already in a relationship but isn’t getting enough attention and validation from her boyfriend will often seek it elsewhere. That’s why you see women cheating on men who are perceived as “top-notch.”

 

[Pumax]

Those words come from exp. @Solomon So you say there are 3 kinds of men?
1) The man she cannot manipulate
2) The man she can manipulate
3) The man who holds her accountable for (It's not clear whether the third it's being manipulated or not)

A lot of women don't like that.

This is part of the reason you see women with “bad boys.” It's not just the excitement and tingles. Often these women are “bad” themselves. Stable, high self-esteem men are less tolerant of drama, so those women self-select elsewhere.

That's the million dollar question man and we all ask it. Do these women really exist or is it simply an illusion that we men tell ourselves?

It seems to me that women are attracted to the same things on a reptilian level.
Whether women are "bad" or "stable" doesn't matter. (But I hope I'm inexperienced and wrong.)

Every man appreciates less drama and more serenity and peace.
But we still want women for their feminine side of companionship and for sex.

That's why you see women cheating on men who are perceived as "top-notch."

See, even this doesn't fit the description "bad" or "stable": they'll do it anyway.

There's something at a basic, reptilian level in the way their brains work that attracts them to chaos, drama, fear, uncertainty, toxicity.
But we all men are told to stay on the oppositve side, be strong in your life, drama free, and to not allow women to take over or manipualte you.

 

[Fortune_favors_the_bold]

I think age plays a strong role.

Women above their late 20s crave stability and such stability in their mind only comes from control.

This is why men below a certain threshold that failed to get girls in their 20s, become acceptable later on.
It's not because women discover "inside beauty" with maturity but because different goals require different priorities.

A 25 yrs old woman gets commitment and resources just by her presernce while an older one needs constant action which involves control over a man.

In my opinion 90% of good men that are married are basically unpaid employer of their wives.

Now going back to looks, clearly a good looking man with a positive personal record with girls since his late teens is much less likely to grant commitment and obedience.

Regardin 9s and 10s women, they are so few and so rare that it's hard to extrapolate any pattern.

 

[Pumax]

n my opinion 90% of good men that are married

Okay, I'm talking about that 90% of men you call "good"!
At least in my case, 90% of these men are exactly what I'm talking about.
High toxicity, drama, chaos, irresponsibility.

Women above their late 20s crave stability and such stability in their mind only comes from control.

This is why men below a certain threshold that failed to get girls in their 20s, become acceptable later on.
It's not because women discover "inside beauty" with maturity but because different goals require different priorities.

I've seen it happen pretty much all the time! Well said.

 

[Solomon]

Those words come from exp. @Solomon So you say there are 3 kinds of men?
1) The man she cannot manipulate
2) The man she can manipulate
3) The man who holds her accountable for (It's not clear whether the third it's being manipulated or not)

I live 5 minutes from a bar/bowling alley. I usually meet up with a guy who is in mid 50s who works as a contractor in marketing. This guy makes $240K a year, has dated hot women in the past, he's no slouch. When it comes to business and stocks he knows his stuff his girlfriend always tells him how fat he is (he used to be a runner, put on some weight since COVID-19 fair enogh) and how he is always doing some crap wrong. She never compliments him. It's got so bad she recently told him "I don't wanna have sex with you anymore cause you're fat". He started doing 25K steps a day

Now he calls her out on her negative behavior as she nags and nitpicks him to death but the problem is that her behavior persists. Is he holding her accountable or not?

I'll let you decide