I can't ever be faithful again..

[Barrister]

I’ve been on both sides. Had three long term LTRs as an adult and also done the whole spinning plates thing. There are advantages and disadvantages to each, but one thing that is certainly true for each is that spinning plates takes lots of time and $ unless you’re in a major city. It’s a time sink where you don’t always get a return. If you’re a big boy with a profession, kids, etc, that gets really hard to commit to unless you have no other hobbies. Don’t get me wrong, I still love the hunt, but I certainly don’t have the insatiable thirst for new pvssy like I did even five years ago as my life has changed since then professionally and personally.

I’d lean towards more LTR type guy - but here is the thing. No matter how tight your game or “maintaining frame” is, you give the woman power when in an LTR. Most men can’t just walk away at the drop of a hat (despite what some guys act like on here), and they will complicate your life in ways that take you away from your overall purpose. And women, no matter how “good” they are, over the grand course of time, will test you, start having less sex with you, and not care like they did when they were trying to lock you down. That’s my experience no matter how great it seems to start out as.

I think there’s a happy medium in there somewhere. Maybe frequent STRs or having a single really good plate that isn’t serious and wants the same thing. It’s always hard to say though. That’s why I put my eggs in my own basket and not into a woman’s.

 

[Gamisch]

No I can't relate. Hot women under 30 with no divorces and no kids aren't begging and screaming and yelling to be my wife.

Not sure how old you are, but it looks like since you didn't get woman's youth for a relationship when you were younger, you are upset. Now you are getting with older women who are tough to deal with and don't look as good, and even though you smash them, any connection you have with them isn't what would have had if you both were younger and grew up together. When a man gets woman's youth, and grows up with her, he will treat her much better than when he gets with an older women, even if that older women looks good for her age.

A woman's youth is a rare and depreciating asset that cannot be reversed or replaced. A woman's youth is the only thing in the world that all men fight and compete for. Men aren't fighting and competing for older women.

Sydney Sweeney -> 28 , never married, no kids. How many suitors does she have lined up?
Nicole Kidman -> 58, twice divorced, 4 kids, 2 adopted 1 biological, 1 surrogate, How many suitors does she have lined up?

Anyways I think the point is you are having an issue dealing with older women, and you can't get into a relationship with younger women, so you are like "f them all!"

I won't fully deny this statement.

But tbh both older and younger women have their drawbacks. I've dealt with plenty of younger women, and the mere factor of a woman being in her prime gives her leverage over a man. Last much younger woman was 19, but she wanted to drink, party, had Tom's of male friends ect. That's not like complicated math but common sense..lifestyles gotta align as well.

I'm more like fqck it because I'm jaded like that. I can pull all kinds of women ,but the dynamics are only giving two options: who wants it more? Again, I've dealt with women from all races and ages so I know a thing or two about the game. There's no " perfect solution " other than what Qeeun B @BeExcellent just described.

I'm not stupid enough ( anymore) to believe that a woman will necessarily stay because I " really " want her to stay.

 

[Gamisch]

After fvcking my wife about 1500 times in the last 13 years i can confirm that.

Anyone telling me different hasnt been there and done that.

New pvssy will allways pull and new pvssy gets old too.


In my experience, the more new pvssy i got, the quicker it got old.

Having been kind of a player for 10 years, at some point i barely made any mental/spiritual connection to new women and they all felt stale after a few weeks.

I decided to take a different approach and only fvck women i could actually imagine a deeper relationship with.

I went half a year without sex and then fell into the trap. My abundance mindset was gone and i took the next women that looked good "on paper". Things went sideways when i began tolerating **** from her that i never would have accepted when i had my healthy dose of new pvssy.

For me, the line between these two extremes is very thin an it takes a great deal of balancing on my side to not fall off the cliff one way or the other.

I actually do think LTRs are the way to go but they come at a price...... like being a fvckboy comes at a price.

Women call the price "working on the relationship". I hate that term because i dont want to WORK on a relationship and i hate that term because i know as soon as you have "to work on the relationship" that woman is not the unicorn you were looking for.

Thee is no "the one" and "happy ever after", there is just a different price to pay.


Choose wisely!

Good point.

New puzzy, and the dynamics behind it are always somewhat similar in nature. Then ,( extremely underrated point) as you sleep with a lotta women you'll might expect too much..if a woman doesn't know how to suck a mean D , you're already looking for the next best thing. Dame goes for whatever little thing that turns you off/ you wished was better. Then finally some women are great in bed but batshyte crazy and impossible to deal with.

Because I let go of the illusion that there's a perfect solution, I simply found peace with the fact that I'm a lone wolf. I seize opportunities when they arise. I'm doing my Hank Moody shyte while I'm working hard to become wealthy

Look ,I understand that I get some pushback but I'm just being dead honest. If anything, I regret I've oftentimes rejected women because I believed in integrity and loyalty. Nowadays I'm primarily loyal to myself .

 

[Gamisch]

I’ve been on both sides. Had three long term LTRs as an adult and also done the whole spinning plates thing. There are advantages and disadvantages to each, but one thing that is certainly true for each is that spinning plates takes lots of time and $ unless you’re in a major city. It’s a time sink where you don’t always get a return. If you’re a big boy with a profession, kids, etc, that gets really hard to commit to unless you have no other hobbies. Don’t get me wrong, I still love the hunt, but I certainly don’t have the insatiable thirst for new pvssy like I did even five years ago as my life has changed since then professionally and personally.

I’d lean towards more LTR type guy - but here is the thing. No matter how tight your game or “maintaining frame” is, you give the woman power when in an LTR. Most men can’t just walk away at the drop of a hat (despite what some guys act like on here), and they will complicate your life in ways that take you away from your overall purpose. And women, no matter how “good” they are, over the grand course of time, will test you, start having less sex with you, and not care like they did when they were trying to lock you down. That’s my experience no matter how great it seems to start out as.

I think there’s a happy medium in there somewhere. Maybe frequent STRs or having a single really good plate that isn’t serious and wants the same thing. It’s always hard to say though. That’s why I put my eggs in my own basket and not into a woman’s.

Imo the "happy medium " is where a man is completely independent and goes his own way.

The MGTOW movement ofcourse leans more towards inceldom, especially because most men struggle now ( remember the 63/ 65 ish % number). But a man can also be MGTOW while declaring himself " happy single".

Again, most women I encounter try to lock me down. Even if it starts out as just casual. And I believe that's the more a man improves, the more women will go through lengths to lock him down thus the drama will intensify.

I don't even remember telling let alone asking a woman to be exclusive with me. I can deal with a woman for a full year without ever mentioning it. Ofcourse there will always be a moment where she is tired if I and pushes for clarification.

 

[jhonny9546]

and not care like they did when they were trying to lock you down.

Or when they want to have a kid with you

 

[Barrister]

Imo the "happy medium " is where a man is completely independent and goes his own way.

The MGTOW movement ofcourse leans more towards inceldom, especially because most men struggle now ( remember the 63/ 65 ish % number). But a man can also be MGTOW while declaring himself " happy single".

Again, most women I encounter try to lock me down. Even if it starts out as just casual. And I believe that's the more a man improves, the more women will go through lengths to lock him down thus the drama will intensify.

I don't even remember telling let alone asking a woman to be exclusive with me. I can deal with a woman for a full year without ever mentioning it. Ofcourse there will always be a moment where she is tired if I and pushes for clarification.

If a woman is into you of course she’s going to push for exclusivity. In my experience this is usually through a “what are we” type question. Rarely is it ever a direct “I want to be exclusive with you” statement. They want you to tell them so they don’t have to admit that they got point blank turned down. The more secure a woman is, generally the faster she does this. Most women are not going to just be a plate for you more than 6 months tops. If they go beyond that it usually says a lot about them.

Otherwise I agree generally with what you’re saying, although the MGTOW label itself has a stigma usually because it isn’t men who are successful and happy with themselves, it’s usually men who feel fed up with women. Just a step away from black pill. Big difference.

 

[BaronOfHair]

Happy weekend y'all.

I can't even be faithful again. I lost that ability. If I see a woman I wanna feck ( and I see them all the time)and the opportunity presents itself, I will.

The irony is that every woman I meet on the other hand tries to lock me down. I'm talking screaming ,yelling, tears. Stories about unfaithful exes. It doesn't move me...I'm kinda heartless when it's about "love".

I play the game accordingly. I'll admit, that this might yet be a major flaw in my game as I like to be an honest guy and I'd prefer to tell women upfront that I'm a dog..but rarely I meet women who will accept that . Perhaps a testimony that I need to grind even harder and get even more leverage..

I'm a broken man when it comes to love, but yet I do attract women from all ages races and occupations. After my "infamous ' dryspell thread I've been sleeping with 4 women...4 women a year while being busy making bank...it's an okay score.

But yeah, I won't ever be that faithful bluepilled beta bytch again...I lost that ability and somehow I'm fine with.


Anyone can relate?

I perhaps COULD choose to be faithful to one broad... My desire to do so currently is comparable to Mark Driscoll's incentive to admit he's no less guilty of what's described here

than every other True Believer is

 

[thelonghornlady]

Advice from the old lady:

Yes @Gamisch you should be honest and transparent that you will not commit. You maintain integrity by doing that. Integrity builds trust and trust builds respect. Women will still try and capture you, but those women will never keep your interest.

A real man always keeps his integrity.

One of these days you will come across a smokeshow who will not try to capture you. She will simply exist in your proximity and you will be intrigued. She will be aloof and ephermeral, you may bed her but she will not demand things from you. Rather she will be kind and yet mysterious; she will be sexy and yet demure. She is unusual in this, not because of her physical beauty, not because of sex...those things are easy to obtain. No she will be engaging and genuine despite her beauty, open and innocent despite her self confidence.

You will crave her company.

And all the other women will fall away from your psyche. You'll be drawn to her, you'll want to possess her, you'll want to protect her and keep her. And she will reward you slowly as you invest.

And you will fall for her. Completely. This is what happens to guys like you. They think they are invincible. Until she quietly enters your life one day....

And your life changes and develops deeper meaning from her presence. You'll see.

You'll see.

I never comment on these boards but wow you should be a writer!

 

[BaronOfHair]

One of these days you will come across a smokeshow who will not try to capture you. She will simply exist in your proximity and you will be intrigued. She will be aloof and ephermeral, you may bed her but she will not demand things from you. Rather she will be kind and yet mysterious; she will be sexy and yet demure. She is unusual in this, not because of her physical beauty, not because of sex...those things are easy to obtain. No she will be engaging and genuine despite her beauty, open and innocent despite her self confidence.

You will crave her company.

Most men have experienced.what you desscribe, BE, a few thousand times... Then the LSD + The fantasies it induced wears off, and reality("We have only the human race/quite possibly blow-up dolls to work with")becomes increasingly impossible to ignore

 

[DJ Novice]

The @BeExcellent fantasy is just that….a fantasy for most people.

50% of relationships will end through divorce, separation or break up.

Out of the remaining 50%, a large proportion will still remain together for a number of reasons (social pressure, sunk cost fallacy, fear of loneliness, staying together for the sake of the kids etc.) but will not be happy.

I’d say less than 5% of people in LTRs are genuinely happy after years of being together.

Not great odds.

We will always be more attracted to what we don’t currently have as we adapt very quickly to what we currently have. That is human nature.

There is a price to be paid for being in LTRs and a price to be paid for chasing STRs. Anyone trying to promote either option as optimal, cost free or all upside is deluding themselves.

 

[Gamisch]

The @BeExcellent fantasy is just that….a fantasy for most people.

50% of relationships will end through divorce, separation or break up.

Out of the remaining 50%, a large proportion will still remain together for a number of reasons (social pressure, sunk cost fallacy, fear of loneliness, staying together for the sake of the kids etc.) but will not be happy.

I’d say less than 5% of people in LTRs are genuinely happy after years of being together.

Not great odds.

We will always be more attracted to what we don’t currently have as we adapt very quickly to what we currently have. That is human nature.

There is a price to be paid for being in LTRs and a price to be paid for chasing STRs. Anyone trying to promote either option as optimal, cost free or all upside is deluding themselves.

Neither is nothingness...it's like the predicament any type of hunter find himself in ; you ought to take the risk , and if you don't the stagnation will kill you.

Every man needs some kind of " love" fot the lack of a better word. Matter a fact, one if the biggest modern issues is that too many men have no drive because they're invisible to women. I know brilliant dudes that feel worthless because they have no woman...while I also know if they'd had a woman it would be a pain in the azz...

I think Be means that even. While being jaded you can and will still encounter women that WILL tickle your spirit. Once that happens ,ofcourse there will be many many factors that determine the outcome...

 

[BaronOfHair]

I’d say less than 5% of people in LTRs are genuinely happy after years of being together.

Not great odds

Putting all this in a larger context:

What you describe is true in MANY aspects of life... Most aren't happy in their careers either, yet refuse to alter their self-defeating thinking/behaviors, or jettison them entirely and replace them with more adaptation ones

Cultivating and maintaining inner peace requires a fair amount of regular effort, therefore most choose to NOT engage in it

 

[Divorced w 3]

Naivety at its finest

 

[Bible_Belt]

Chris Rock:

New pvssy ALWAYS clears the head. But you want someone to read to you when you get old? New pvssy is ILLITERATE!!!!

 

[ThisIsSparta]

Good point.

New puzzy, and the dynamics behind it are always somewhat similar in nature. Then ,( extremely underrated point) as you sleep with a lotta women you'll might expect too much..if a woman doesn't know how to suck a mean D , you're already looking for the next best thing. Dame goes for whatever little thing that turns you off/ you wished was better. Then finally some women are great in bed but batshyte crazy and impossible to deal with.

Because I let go of the illusion that there's a perfect solution, I simply found peace with the fact that I'm a lone wolf. I seize opportunities when they arise. I'm doing my Hank Moody shyte while I'm working hard to become wealthy

Look ,I understand that I get some pushback but I'm just being dead honest. If anything, I regret I've oftentimes rejected women because I believed in integrity and loyalty. Nowadays I'm primarily loyal to myself .

Yeah, i can relate to that. Perfectly understanding why wou would go that way.

I have also disqualified women for not having skills in the sack and to a degree i would do so again.
In the end though, i got so many reasons to be turned off by a woman that none would have ever been enough to LTR them up.

Looking back, i left some nice and hot keepers behind that really deserved a chance.

Being loyal to yourself ist the most important thing, as you cant expect loyalty from beings that are only loyal as long as they think is in their own best interest.

 

[Vanderdonck]

No need to be "faithful" as long as you're honest with yourself and the women you date. If they won't share you they can leave. Simple as that.

I don't think monogamy is for everyone and it's certainly not natural. OP, I was like you for a long time. Now I'm monogamous by choice. Let's say I can be 99% monogamous 99% of the time, lol. Other women are fun to flirt with but overall don't really impress me, and I know once the panties drop I'll be looking to lose them. I know 1000% if I were single I'd be killing it again. But I found a great one to be with so I'm satisfied. Not telling you how you should live your life though, just giving you my experience. Stay true to yourself and life will reward you.