Are your dating problems actual problems or excuses?

[CornbreadFed]

You are Cooked

Sub-3- It’s over G.

Below 5’3- It’s over G.

Voicecel- This can go either way. If your case is mild, you just need to leave your house. If it’s truly severe, you might be cooked. Either way, good luck bro.

No female experience beyond your 20s- If you are 30 or older and have never had a real girlfriend or non-transactional, sober sex, you are royally screwed my dude.

Mental illness-Depends on how severe it is and how willing you are to fix it.

Full-on black or red pill nihilist- If you got an early vasectomy, talk like it’s The Handmaid’s Tale, or preaching passport bro shvt before 40...you are beyond saving bro.

Legitimate, but we can work with it

Below 5’3 to 5’5- You need to looksmax, hobbymax, and stand out massively to attract niche women. Is it easy? No. Is it possible? Yes.

Defeatist victim mentality- You have been brainwashed by red pill trauma and now you are negative and unbearable to be around. You might get quick hookups but it all fizzles fast. Solution: therapy.

Unattractive toxic personality- Usually applies to blue pill guys too. If your personality is garbage, even if you are Chad, women will treat you like dog crap eventually. Solution: therapy.

High intelligence-
Unless you are also Chad, intelligence can work against you when building emotional connections. Smart women are just as hypergamous and toxic, so you need to adapt and learn to connect with more average people. Learn emotional IQ and niche max towards women that find smart guys attractive.

Lack of experience until early or mid 20s
Most guys who struggle ignored learning social skills with women in high school or college. You have to embrace the suck for a few years and grind it out. This is usually average fvcked, but if you don’t fix it by your late 20s, it can get severe.

Obese- Stop chasing women and fix yourself first. Go to therapy and lose weight.

Being sub-5- You have two options: accept that you won’t get genuine desire, or date women in your own height range and be content.

Average fvcked (you are fine with a clear strategy)

I am not white-
Most humans on earth are not white and still find partners. Usually, these guys are stuck in redneck small towns chasing the high value white girls who only date local Chads. Move to a real city and start being realistic with your dating strategy.

Slightly below average height- Work on what you can. Improve style, get hobbies, get interesting.

Overweight- Lose the weight.

Bad location- Move to a better place.

Naive blue pill or scarcity mindset-Fix this by making yourself more attractive and gaining options.

No social circle- Do online dating, go out, approach people, and make friends.

Negative traits (no confidence, weird, low energy, boring, etc.)- First step: acknowledge the problem. Then start fixing it piece by piece.

Leave your house!!

Average height- Leave your house.

Money or job related- Plenty of broke or unemployed dudes are smashing. You are better off washing dishes at a bar than stuck in some soul-sucking 9 to 5 if your goal is to meet & smash women.

I am not Chad -Leave your house.

Bonus: What if I have more than one issue?

The good news: fixing one big problem usually solves others. For example, if you lack experience in your late 20s, it’s probably because you are overweight, boring, lack confidence, and live at home in some dead-end small town. The only ones I see as a dead-on arrival are sub-3, below 5ft 3, and unworkable mental illness.

I am open to reference any other problems that I missed.

 

[Barrister]

In fairness, most of these things aren’t true problems unless it’s something extreme like being under 5’3. And even then a man always can compensate by becoming the best version of himself he can be in other facets. And intelligence is never a bad thing and can help you become an elite conversationalist - which paired with knowing how to dress can you make a powerful cold approache

And you’re implying a vasectomy is a bad thing in some way? I’ve had one for over a year now and it’s the greatest thing ever. I’m close to but still under 40. I had strong swimmers (RIP), so I can’t recommend this enough to guys who don’t want kids.

Interesting list. But don’t agree on a number of things.

 

[Manure Spherian]

You are Cooked

Sub-3- It’s over G.

Below 5’3- It’s over G.

Voicecel- This can go either way. If your case is mild, you just need to leave your house. If it’s truly severe, you might be cooked. Either way, good luck bro.

No female experience beyond your 20s- If you are 30 or older and have never had a real girlfriend or non-transactional, sober sex, you are royally screwed my dude.

Mental illness-Depends on how severe it is and how willing you are to fix it.

Full-on black or red pill nihilist- If you got an early vasectomy, talk like it’s The Handmaid’s Tale, or preaching passport bro shvt before 40...you are beyond saving bro.

Legitimate, but we can work with it

Below 5’3 to 5’5- You need to looksmax, hobbymax, and stand out massively to attract niche women. Is it easy? No. Is it possible? Yes.

Defeatist victim mentality- You have been brainwashed by red pill trauma and now you are negative and unbearable to be around. You might get quick hookups but it all fizzles fast. Solution: therapy.

Unattractive toxic personality- Usually applies to blue pill guys too. If your personality is garbage, even if you are Chad, women will treat you like dog crap eventually. Solution: therapy.

High intelligence-
Unless you are also Chad, intelligence can work against you when building emotional connections. Smart women are just as hypergamous and toxic, so you need to adapt and learn to connect with more average people. Learn emotional IQ and niche max towards women that find smart guys attractive.

Lack of experience until early or mid 20s
Most guys who struggle ignored learning social skills with women in high school or college. You have to embrace the suck for a few years and grind it out. This is usually average fvcked, but if you don’t fix it by your late 20s, it can get severe.

Obese- Stop chasing women and fix yourself first. Go to therapy and lose weight.

Being sub-5- You have two options: accept that you won’t get genuine desire, or date women in your own height range and be content.

Average fvcked (you are fine with a clear strategy)

I am not white-
Most humans on earth are not white and still find partners. Usually, these guys are stuck in redneck small towns chasing the high value white girls who only date local Chads. Move to a real city and start being realistic with your dating strategy.

Slightly below average height- Work on what you can. Improve style, get hobbies, get interesting.

Overweight- Lose the weight.

Bad location- Move to a better place.

Naive blue pill or scarcity mindset-Fix this by making yourself more attractive and gaining options.

No social circle- Do online dating, go out, approach people, and make friends.

Negative traits (no confidence, weird, low energy, boring, etc.)- First step: acknowledge the problem. Then start fixing it piece by piece.

Leave your house!!

Average height- Leave your house.

Money or job related- Plenty of broke or unemployed dudes are smashing. You are better off washing dishes at a bar than stuck in some soul-sucking 9 to 5 if your goal is to meet & smash women.

I am not Chad -Leave your house.

Bonus: What if I have more than one issue?

The good news: fixing one big problem usually solves others. For example, if you lack experience in your late 20s, it’s probably because you are overweight, boring, lack confidence, and live at home in some dead-end small town. The only ones I see as a dead-on arrival are sub-3, below 5ft 3, and unworkable mental illness.

I am open to reference any other problems that I missed.

Most here can be prevented, even for short men, by keeping physically fit and being properly socialized early.

Plenty of dumpy looking men have women because ther don’t live in a bubble and never did. No “game” or clownmaxxing required.

 

[MatureDJ]

Short men need to HobbyMax? This sounds like a form of JesterMaxxing.

 

[Manure Spherian]

Short men

Need to be socially linked up young, as do most men.

 

[zekko]

If I was looking:
I'm average height, and I am not Chad. So that puts me in the Leave Your House category. Which sounds about right.

 

[SW15]

In fairness, most of these things aren’t true problems unless it’s something extreme like being under 5’3.

Below 5’3 to 5’5- You need to looksmax, hobbymax, and stand out massively to attract niche women. Is it easy? No. Is it possible? Yes.

Height is a major issue.

5'5" or lower means that a man will need to have extreme charisma in order to get laid. If he's 5'5" and Hispanic or Filipino, that's less of an issue because Hispanic and Filipina women are accustomed to shorter men. 5'5" and White is going to be a much bigger issue since White women are unaccustomed to shorter men.

Voicecel- This can go either way. If your case is mild, you just need to leave your house. If it’s truly severe, you might be cooked. Either way, good luck bro.

This is a real issue. I know a guy who hasn't done well in the sexual marketplace primarily because of the sound of his voice.

High intelligence-
Unless you are also Chad, intelligence can work against you when building emotional connections. Smart women are just as hypergamous and toxic, so you need to adapt and learn to connect with more average people. Learn emotional IQ and niche max towards women that find smart guys attractive.

High intelligence is usually a bad sign in seduction. It might be linked with a STEM degree, STEM occupation, nerdy/geeky hobbies, or even autism spectrum disorder, all of which dry up the pussie.

The solution is to de-emphasize intelligence and emphasize looks. Develop a good physique from the gym and sports participation. Get better hobbies that women can relate to in a more meaningful way.

Bad location- Move to a better place.

If a man gets to his mid-20s+ and he finds himself unattached, he likely needs to live in a major population center in order to have a decent sex and relationship life.

The minimum population of an area that a 25+ man needs to order to have mating environment success is somewhere around 200,000 - 400,000. 500,000+ is better. Every market is different. There are even some challenging markets in the USA with 500,000+ metro populations.

No social circle- Do online dating, go out, approach people, and make friends.

It's possible to get laid and get into relationships without a social circle. It will require more effort. Approaching strangers in real life is a difficult endeavor. Swipe apps are inefficient for all but the top 10-15% of men.

Making friends is a good idea in general. It might not help in mating. I've had friends in my current city but never a viable social circle. I've only had mating interactions outside of my circle.

Money or job related- Plenty of broke or unemployed dudes are smashing. You are better off washing dishes at a bar than stuck in some soul-sucking 9 to 5 if your goal is to meet & smash women.

@BPH is a great example of a broke guy who smashes many women. That's why he's one of the top seducers on this forum.

There are so many men with bachelor's degrees + and white collar work who struggle to get attention from women. There are guys making $75,000+ per year who don't get much in the way of sex/relationships from women.

A good portion of women now have decent jobs and don't need a man for provider provisioning. A bachelor's degree + and a white collar job could get men laid more in the past than in recent times. Women have been getting their own bachelor's degrees + and white collar jobs.

 

[BadBoy89]

Height is a major issue.

In the West, its the only issue. Height is so important in the West. It's number 1. If a man is bald yet over 6'0 and in shape, he can do well in the West.

In the East, height is less important than the West; but a man's hair is more important than West A man has to have great hair in the East. A man can't be bald in the East and except to do well with women, even if he is 6'0. The women in the East will much more accepting of a man not 6'0 when he has a good set of hair.

@BPH is a great example of a broke guy who smashes many women. That's why he's one of the top seducers on this forum.

You really believe a hot woman 25 year old woman is going to sleep with a broke guy because he spits a few words?

Woman are alot smarter than you think. They can figure out a guy's situation in 15 seconds by talking to him. I mean if they are both 18, OK, but a 25 year old woman out of college, working at white collar job, or even working at blue collar job, or even going to school to learn English, if she is good looking and has any sort sense to her, is not going to sleep with a broke guy unless he's in Med School.

Now if she is a slut, a single mother, older than 30, overweight, menopausal, or ugly, then yes for sure, broke guy can seduce with his eyes closed. But if she hot and under 30, no, I don't believe it.

Sosuave said Tom Brady did not sleep with Sydney Sweeney last weekend at Jeff Bezos's wedding party. OK lets go with that. A 6'4, handsome, famous, extremely rich former athlete, probably the best athlete after Michael Jordan, wasn't able to pull an almost 30 year old famous actress who has been naked on subscription TV at the most opportunity time.

Yet broke Sosuave members, with no job, with no money, with no home, with nice car can seduce hotter and younger Sydney Sweeney lookalikes because they know how to dress and get to their emotions?

Tom Brady can't do it, but Sosuave members can.

Rock on!

 

[CoolWave1331]

Some fine points

In my opinion the real show stoppers are the personality based stuff

You can have everything going for you BUT if you are straight up weird and don't know how to connect with women (people in general) your goose is cooked. Opportunities may present themselves but you'll continually fumble them and overtime this will take it's toll (you'll be one of these guys on some of these forever alone forums). I've seen it happen several times - a lot of guys have potential but they can't get out of their own way to succeed.

 

[SW15]

Sosuave said Tom Brady did not sleep with Sydney Sweeney last weekend at Jeff Bezos's wedding party. OK lets go with that. A 6'4, handsome, famous, extremely rich former athlete, probably the best athlete after Michael Jordan, wasn't able to pull an almost 30 year old famous actress who has been naked on subscription TV at the most opportunity time.

Yet broke Sosuave members, with no job, with no money, with no home, with nice car can seduce hotter and younger Sydney Sweeney lookalikes because they know how to dress and get to their emotions?

I said that there's a good chance sex happened between Tom Brady and Sydney Sweeney. Few people know the truth though.

Most Women Under 30 Have Slept with 70 Men or More ... While the Average Guy Gets Laid Once Every Year

More men are invisible to women now Ya gotta put yourself out there to be noticed, be this in the realm of dating and mating, or anything else in life. Our current zeitgeist is one in which a mantra which goes something like: "The System f-cked me over, and The Evil Overlords who rule this...

www.sosuave.net

Tom Brady can't do it, but Sosuave members can.

I have an unpopular opinion on Tom Brady. I have never seen Tom Brady as a true Alpha male. His relationship with Bridget Moynahan from 2004-2006 is the best evidence of him not being an Alpha. What Alpha male who has been part of a Super Bowl winning team is dating a woman 6 years older than him?

Additionally, his relationship with Gisele Bundchen seems like a classic beta male story. It's two long married people getting tired of each other after 10+ years.

Height is so important in the West.

It is. My average range 5'10" height is not valued in the slightest way in the United States. I've noticed that it has gotten worse over time.

I reached my adult height around age 17 in 2000. From 2000-2009, I never felt like my height was special, but I didn't feel like women were rejecting me over it. Around 2010, I started to notice a change in how women were perceiving my height. As female abundance was increasing due to the rise of online dating and social media, I started to notice that women were starting to think more negatively about my 5'10", average range height.

You really believe a hot woman 25 year old woman is going to sleep with a broke guy because he spits a few words?

No, I don't. It's more due to looks than words.

 

[CoolWave1331]

If Tom Brady isn't an alpha male then no one is. He's rich, famous, athletically gifted & influential. He's very recognizable (in North America anyway). He doesn't so much as have to lift a finger to attract female attention. We know he is stopped in public all the time for photos etc.

I also found some of his picks questionable but this isn't important.

He probably did have sex with Sydney and I doubt he had to try very hard. Who cares what they did or didn't do though, this doesn't benefit us in anyway.

 

[characternote]

 

[Solomon]

The most important for any man is to be brutally self-honest with his strength, weaknesses etc.
Some men embrace the challenge and grind not just for women but to be the best self overall
Most men don't and thus give up
The amount of incel or incel type comments I see on social media is really disturbing
Even if it doesn't have anything to do with game and redpill comments, you see some dude always some goofy shyt like
"80% women of women only want 20% of men" or "She was a 304 and deserved to die"
The latter comment was numerous comments I saw on a dude who killed his wife because she wanted a divorce and started dating someone else a mother of 7 children.

 

[CornbreadFed]

I have an unpopular opinion on Tom Brady. I have never seen Tom Brady as a true Alpha male. His relationship with Bridget Moynahan from 2004-2006 is the best evidence of him not being an Alpha. What Alpha male who has been part of a Super Bowl winning team is dating a woman 6 years older than him?

I have to respectfully disagree with you on this point. A man who leads some of the biggest and most athletic men in the world undoubtedly deserves to be called an alpha male. If we start measuring a man's "alphaness" solely by his success with women, then by that logic, guys like Ray Ray, Pookie, and various bad boys would be considered alpha — which, in my opinion, is absurd.

 

[CoolWave1331]

The most important for any man is to be brutally self-honest with his strength, weaknesses etc.
Some men embrace the challenge and grind not just for women but to be the best self overall
Most men don't and thus give up
The amount of incel or incel type comments I see on social media is really disturbing
Even if it doesn't have anything to do with game and redpill comments, you see some dude always some goofy shyt like
"80% women of women only want 20% of men" or "She was a 304 and deserved to die"
The latter comment was numerous comments I saw on a dude who killed his wife because she wanted a divorce and started dating someone else a mother of 7 children.

These are stupid guys & I don't feel sorry for them. It's easy to understand why they have no luck - these are not "good guys" though they like to pretend they are. Don't understand why so pressed about women when it doesn't seem they like them.

All this stuff about 80 and 20 percent, "chad" is stupid & cope. If the game was truly dominated by small % of guys and have to be some sort of Chris Hemsworth type guy, all the males running around would be little Chris Hemsworths. If have the good fortune to live in a big city and/or work in service jobs (like restaurant) you have birds eye view to what really goes on. Most guys more or less average appearance, average income and they date, get gfs etc.

Today is the 4th of July (Happy 4th of July to all btw) i'm sure there are many public gatherings across the United States - all men got to do is simply go out and observe to be convinced of the above.

 

[CornbreadFed]

And you’re implying a vasectomy is a bad thing in some way? I’ve had one for over a year now and it’s the greatest thing ever. I’m close to but still under 40. I had strong swimmers (RIP), so I can’t recommend this enough to guys who don’t want kids.

I should’ve clarified that if you are below the age of 40 with no reason to get a vasectomy.

 

[The Duke]

All of this arguing back and forth is pointless. I'm glad women aren't this black and white. Enjoy the 4th of July wknd and see if you can't find some girls to chat up. Cheers!

 

[BaronOfHair]

We all make a choice to conceptualize things we're personally dissatisfied with as "problems", as opposed to... Well, things we're personally dissatisfied with

Analogy: In a sword fight to death like so

, being physically smaller(as Madmartigan is, compared to his adversary) and not built like a pro-wrestler(like G. Kael)is only a "problem", IF one refuses to exploit being leaner and more agile than the opponent

 

[BPH]

In the West, its the only issue. Height is so important in the West. It's number 1. If a man is bald yet over 6'0 and in shape, he can do well in the West.

In the East, height is less important than the West; but a man's hair is more important than West A man has to have great hair in the East. A man can't be bald in the East and except to do well with women, even if he is 6'0. The women in the East will much more accepting of a man not 6'0 when he has a good set of hair.



You really believe a hot woman 25 year old woman is going to sleep with a broke guy because he spits a few words?

Woman are alot smarter than you think. They can figure out a guy's situation in 15 seconds by talking to him. I mean if they are both 18, OK, but a 25 year old woman out of college, working at white collar job, or even working at blue collar job, or even going to school to learn English, if she is good looking and has any sort sense to her, is not going to sleep with a broke guy unless he's in Med School.

Now if she is a slut, a single mother, older than 30, overweight, menopausal, or ugly, then yes for sure, broke guy can seduce with his eyes closed. But if she hot and under 30, no, I don't believe it.

Sosuave said Tom Brady did not sleep with Sydney Sweeney last weekend at Jeff Bezos's wedding party. OK lets go with that. A 6'4, handsome, famous, extremely rich former athlete, probably the best athlete after Michael Jordan, wasn't able to pull an almost 30 year old famous actress who has been naked on subscription TV at the most opportunity time.

Yet broke Sosuave members, with no job, with no money, with no home, with nice car can seduce hotter and younger Sydney Sweeney lookalikes because they know how to dress and get to their emotions?

Tom Brady can't do it, but Sosuave members can.

Rock on!

Can you stop crying like a baby if you're not even gonna debate your points when I give you my attention?

When did you become like this?

Tom Brady, the 6'4" handsome, famous, extremely rich former athlete, also got cheated on by his wife.

Will Smith, one of the most well-known and successful actors of our generation, is married to a woman who treats him like her backup choice to Tupac, and gets slammed by her son's friends.

It's like you can't fathom the world being any other way than how it's presented to you in tabloids...

 

[CornbreadFed]

Can you stop crying like a baby if you're not even gonna debate your points when I give you my attention?

When did you become like this?

Tom Brady, the 6'4" handsome, famous, extremely rich former athlete, also got cheated on by his wife.

Will Smith, one of the most well-known and successful actors of our generation, is married to a woman who treats him like her backup choice to Tupac, and gets slammed by her son's friends.

It's like you can't fathom the world being any other way than how it's presented to you in tabloids...

The harsh truth is that women especially younger women like Sydney Sweeney are completely OP in the dating world and will always have more advantages than men like Tom Brady or Will Smith. No man is immune long term to a woman's BS and this will all depend on who you are dating. A woman that is constantly exposed to other high value men and toxic aspects of society will be the harder to suppress than a woman that isn't.