Traveling on Business... Plan Logicistics or Arrive Unexpected?

[BadgerKing]

When traveling on business to a location where a girl who likes you happens to live...

Would you plan a meeting with her in advance?

Or arrive, get situated, and then invite her to join you on an outing?

I'm thinking the spontaneity could be beneficial and more interesting.

Sure, planning in advance has its own merits... but also creates additional tension and stress.

(It's the first time you've met in person, or you haven't seen them in a while, and don't communicate often.)

 

[BPH]

I'm surprised nobody answered this.

I always suggest planning. Spontaneity is a fantasy that women have from watching too many romcoms. Very few people are willing to make plans on a whim - and even less willing to follow through on them.

If you didn't expect to be in town, or didn't know she would also be in town until the last minute, then sure, spontaneity is all you've got. But otherwise, it's always better to know whether you can count on seeing somebody in advance so you can make other plans if they're unavailable or unresponsive.

 

[BadgerKing]

Spontaneity is a fantasy that women have from watching too many romcoms. Very few people are willing to make plans on a whim - and even less willing to follow through on them.

Thanks for the response.

You make a good point, and I could be mistaken, but was thinking the spontaneity would be beneficial to having a girl follow through... as opposed to being given more time to ruminate and backing out.

And I'll be in the city anyway, so whether or not she shows won't affect much.

 

[Barrister]

The answer is “it depends.” You want to keep some freedom to meet other women. If the woman you’re talking about is plate status or above I’d make a loose plan to meet her later in the evening so you have her as a fall back. If you meet something better earlier in the night you go with that.

Otherwise, always keep your options open.

 

[Clockwerk50]

About a week to 10 days before you’re planning to be in the area, spit a little game and send her a message like, "Hey [name], I’ll be in your area [dates] and would love to grab a drink and catch up. What days work for you?" Keep the tone simple, genuine, and straightforward. Seduction/attraction is all about timing, and if she is unhappy with her current circumstances or is open to new experiences, you may be in.

To keep in touch with a long term plate, limit communication unless you’re actually heading there soon. The birthday is an exception, but other than that, try to keep texting minimal. It's easier to recover from the comment "You never texted me!" than from "Ugh, he's so clingy."