"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Read more...

Maintaining a chasing dynamic

FlexpertHamilton

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 10, 2020
Messages
3,143
Reaction score
3,656
Location
US
When high IL women are doing most if not all of the chasing/initiating for dates/hangouts, and texts in general, do you try to maintain this dynamic completely, or do find it better to pepper in sporadic initiation on your end? ie what I'm asking is if women are doing 100/0 or 90/10 the initiating, is this even sustainable and is trying to maintain this long-term akin to shooting yourself in the foot? If so, is something like between 60-40 and 80-20 more realistic? Not asking for specific "ratios" but just a ballpark.

For clarification, I'm not specifically talking about any type of relationship whether it's a 100% casual or serious LTRs you want to marry, since I think every girl should start as a "casual lover/toy" that changes accordingly as time goes on. What is your strategy/mindset about this?
 
Last edited:

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

Read more...

Serenity

Moderator
Joined
Aug 19, 2013
Messages
5,150
Reaction score
5,057
Age
35
Location
Eye of the storm
At some point it might start to feel unnatural to force a dynamic where she's always the one reaching out, but it's certainly a good thing she's doing the work early on.

She has to feel like she's winning, if you're not giving a little bit over time she'll eventually be frustrated. The reward is getting increasingly more of your attention, but at the start you're making her work for it and only giving breadcrumbs.

I think it should slowly move more towards a 50/50 over time, but not beyond that where you're the one doing more work. Roughly 50/50 is the end point.
 

FlexpertHamilton

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 10, 2020
Messages
3,143
Reaction score
3,656
Location
US
At some point it might start to feel unnatural to force a dynamic where she's always the one reaching out, but it's certainly a good thing she's doing the work early on.

She has to feel like she's winning, if you're not giving a little bit over time she'll eventually be frustrated. The reward is getting increasingly more of your attention, but at the start you're making her work for it and only giving breadcrumbs.

I think it should slowly move more towards a 50/50 over time, but not beyond that where you're the one doing more work. Roughly 50/50 is the end point.
even more true if she does you favors and stuff like that too. i naturally want to reward that (with more attention/validation) and am making sure i have pruned out all the autistic "game" axioms from my mind which would dictate being aloof 24/7
 
Last edited:

FlexpertHamilton

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 10, 2020
Messages
3,143
Reaction score
3,656
Location
US
I have longterm 'casual' relationships only. Mostly because I make it clear to potential lovers that I have other priorities in my life than having a committed monogamous relationship. Most women who want to have monogamy / exclusivity / commitment will not step into my lair.

Of course I do meet women who think that they are the Annette Bening to my Warren Beatty, but they either figure out that I wasn't joking but decide that sharing me is better than not having me or they leave to look for someone to live with.

No matter how many 'boyfriend' things I do with lovers (like going to a street market to find good ingredients for the dinner she wants to prepare for me, or coming with me to social events, or dancing the night away in a tango salon), they know I'm not going to lead them to the wedding altar.

Maybe to an altar in a desecrated church where I tie them up and fvck them mercilessly, but there won't be an exchanging of rings.
I mean I'm in a similar mindset myself, I have never and will never want a family let alone even to live together/get married. Only difference is that I'm willing to do LTRs if they understand that I can only commit 1-2 days per week to them, won't do sleepovers, won't ever live with them, and demand and maintain high boundaries of acceptable behavior that 99% of women won't agree to, so I don't even bother anymore.
 

Ricky

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 9, 2002
Messages
4,140
Reaction score
899
Age
52
I mean I'm in a similar mindset myself, I have never and will never want a family let alone even to live together/get married. Only difference is that I'm willing to do LTRs if they understand that I can only commit 1-2 days per week to them, won't do sleepovers, won't ever live with them, and demand and maintain high boundaries of acceptable behavior that 99% of women won't agree to, so I don't even bother anymore.
I had a relationship like that for 3 years where i would see her friday and Saturday night and spend the night and have sex. It worked great. I just knew eventually i couldn’t marry her and live with her daily
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

Top