"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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my struggles with the ladies go way beyond mere social awkwardness

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"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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GoodMan32

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Yet, if the OP were a chick, none of these would be an impediment to having a social life. :mad:

Or if the OP were a dude, but tall, these would not be an impediment either. :mad:
I don't necessarily think the factors I mentioned are why I have hardly any social life.

My lack of a social life is largely my own choice. All I'm saying is my lack of a social life is yet another thing that would make a woman think I'm bad news.
 

corrector

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I don't necessarily think the factors I mentioned are why I have hardly any social life.

My lack of a social life is largely my own choice. All I'm saying is my lack of a social life is yet another thing that would make a woman think I'm bad news.
You don't have social events at your office?
 

GoodMan32

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Heck, the extremists in ISIS couldn't keep the poontang away, so I don't agree with this assessment. Pol Pot wasn't a RiceCel. :eek:
Leaders in general have an easy time getting laid (whether it be political leaders, business leaders, frontman of a famous band, etc).

Because a woman is attracted to leadership.
 

GoodMan32

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OP you have to understand the world does not owe you anything

Ok you've got personal issues , find me someone who doesn't ?

Find solutions to the issues and improve yourself , then worry about women

its not rocket science to understand a woman wants the best type of man she can get and vice versa
For 15 years now, I've been accused of feeling owed (not just when it comes to a woman; in other contexts too). Pisses me off.

There's a huge difference between feeling owed something vs simply wanting something.

Ironically, the year I had the best luck with getting laid (2012), I was a student with no income whatsoever. Yet in the current stage of life, where I have a full time job (albeit with a low income), I have worse luck with the ladies? What a thinker.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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GoodMan32

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You don't have social events at your office?
We have a decent amount of daytime teambuilding exercises. As for events outside of work, hardly ever. Don't get me wrong; a lot of employees are friends outside of work. But as for work-sanctioned events outside of work, I only recall one in the 5 years I've been at this job. I didn't go.

At a past job, there were lots of get togethers outside work (which I sometimes attended...and hated)
 

BaronOfHair

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Come to think of it, I suppose the topic warrants its own thread
We had that thread already https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threa...me-to-try-with-making-moves-in-person.282277/

It was, quite frankly, less productive than trying to persuade The Aryans and The Black Guerilla Family over at Pelican Bay to stop stabbing each other through their necks with homemade shivs during yardtime, in favor of hugging things out instead. Unless you're receptive to suggestions this time around, there's no evidence supporting the hypothesis that THIS thread will be any different

Goes without saying, I hope I'm wrong... All of us here DO want to see you succeed, GM. We wouldn't be on your case so ferociously otherwise
 
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BaronOfHair

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Evidently though his income/vehicle/home ownership hasn't gotten him anywhere with the ladies. I guess what I'm saying is even if you have stuff going for you, there's still no guarantee you'll succeed sexually.
Different tactics and strategies are required to achieve different goals in different scenarios. George Wills's talent for slathering the pages of WaPo in bombast doesn't mean he can acquit himself competently on the ball field
 

Reincarnated

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Focus on removing the first two from the list in the next 6-12 months. This will significantly lower the hurdles required to mitigate remaining items.

Even if you don't have a car due to your current financial situation, there are programs all around the country that will allow you to get the training required to obtain a license. Focus on improving your financial situation over time instead of allowing it to hold you back.

Once you've dealt with these two, the rest are essentially a slow domino effect.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

BaronOfHair

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The fact I hold extreme political beliefs (Since we aren't supposed to talk politics on this forum, I won't get into my exact beliefs. The point is: Extreme political beliefs in either direction can hurt your chances with the ladies. Extreme beliefs are called extreme for a reason
If you're living in The US, what you describe has been getting more and more common over that past two decades, GM. Ergo, hooking up with women on your "side" will likely to be remarkably easy, while "vibing" with a chick who's NOT a fanatic will be nigh impossible

Your fear on this front is irrational
 

GoodMan32

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We had that thread already https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threa...me-to-try-with-making-moves-in-person.282277/

It was, quite frankly, less productive than trying to persuade The Aryans and The Black Guerilla Family over at Pelican Bay to stop stabbing each other through their necks with homemade shivs during yardtime, in favor of hugging things out instead. Unless you're receptive to suggestions this time around, there's no evidence supporting the hypothesis that THIS thread will be any different

Goes without saying, I hope I'm wrong... All of us here DO want to see you succeed, GM. We wouldn't be on your case so ferociously otherwise
That thread you linked isn't quite the same.

On my latest thread, I elaborate on just how much I have going against me.
 

GoodMan32

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If you're living in The US, what you describe has been getting more and more common over that past two decades, GM. Ergo, hooking up with women on your "side" will likely to be remarkably easy, while "vibing" with a chick who's NOT a fanatic will be nigh impossible

Your fear on this front is irrational
I said I won't get into my exact beliefs (and I won't). But let's just say "my side" tends to be a sausage fest.
 

GoodMan32

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Come to think of it, my brother is largely the antithesis of me.

  • He has an expensive vehicle.
  • He makes 6 figures.
  • He owns multiple homes.
  • He has a decent social life.
  • His political beliefs are mainstream.
  • And while he does have some degree of mental illness (it runs in the family), his mental illness isn't debilitating like mine is. The main area in which his mental illness comes into play: He's a workaholic (that's how he makes so much money at his young age). How lucky of him that even his mental illness ends up benefitting him.
Yet in spite of everything he has working in his favor, he (as far as I know) has made it to 30 without ever having a girlfriend, going on a date, having sex, or even kissing.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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GoodMan32

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This is a good way to describe it. @GoodMan32 has done well finding 9 sex partners through "conventional dating" given all of that.
I must say your assessment of me is all over the place.

One minute you'll compliment the fact I've nailed 9 free partners (6 of which happened during college) in spite of everything working against me.

Then the next minute, you'll tell me the fact I got all my college sex through tech methods means I wasted my college years.
 

Bingo-Player

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For 15 years now, I've been accused of feeling owed (not just when it comes to a woman; in other contexts too). Pisses me off.

There's a huge difference between feeling owed something vs simply wanting something.

Ironically, the year I had the best luck with getting laid (2012), I was a student with no income whatsoever. Yet in the current stage of life, where I have a full time job (albeit with a low income), I have worse luck with the ladies? What a thinker.
You can want as much as you please nobody cares about your wants aside from maybe your parents and maybe other very close family members

The worlds a battlefield especially for a man its dog EAT dog

Women sleep with guys who make sh1t happen , guys who go and get what they want , guys who make moves

Not guys who sit around In their parents spare bedroom complaining about how unfair everything is

Stop wallowing , go and do the work.
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

Read more...

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