This definitely exists, and probably something you see a lot on the internet, but I think amongst the general population of young men this is relatively uncommon and not that norm. I think this particular issue is way more common with women than men, where their expectations are quite lofty and they constantly complain about their being "no good men". The thing is, the current dating culture allows them to get this way because they can still find validation and attention from men.
Again, I think is an issue you see way more with women than men. Using your obese example, women are not only told it's ok to be fat but to embrace it lol. I don't really see things like this where men should embrace body positivity when they look horrendous lol, there's a double standard haha.
I actually made a post about this on here not that long ago. A lot of guys that get into lifting honestly become obsessed with bench press numbers and getting as big as possible and literally become overweight and even obese, I see it a lot. Most of these guys and those that get into hardcore bodybuilding legitimately are functionally obese. Regardless of their body fat percentage, a lot of these guys would struggle with something like doing a rock wall climb, going for a hike or any sort of physical activity you could think of that normal fit people can do.
Not that long ago at one of the gyms I was going to I was having a conversation with a bro there and he mentioned how he wanted to bulk up to 300 pounds lol, to put this into perspective he was in his early to mid 30s and 6' tall. I asked him why and he mentioned something about wanting to bench press a lot of weight. I then made a comment about how at his age he should be careful with that because he could be putting himself at risk for high blood pressure or even a heart attack in his 40s lol. I don't think he took that comment very well because he acts like a douche to me when I see him lol.
As for the comments about what women find attractive. When it comes to your physique women aren't really as picky as some think. Most women are legitimately turned off by both the excessively lean look and the roided up, over muscled look. They like guys that have fit bodies, healthy body fat percentages, etc. Some guys are naturally more gifted with say proportional physiques, or where they have a small waist and broad shoulders, etc. However, if you are somewhere between a legitimate 10-20% bf and athletically built you are in great shape, though I'd say peak for aesthetics would be 10-15% bf. Most guys honestly struggle to maintain 10% bf, but even at under 15% you'll have a trim stomach and some degree of ab definition. If you were to take Brad Pitt and gave him a physique that is broader and with more muscle but say 15-17% bf, women would still find him attractive. It really doesn't make much of a difference.
At my height and frame, I consider myself a big guy and around 230ish right now, though not that long ago was around 240. If I was at 220 I'd have practically nothing left in regards to BF, and at 240+ I started getting a bit too high in body fa. Where I'm at I find is a perfect medium.
Not sure about this comment, if you are referring to t shirts that is. I'm 6'4" and I wear large shirts and I find they are the perfect fit and are typically tight(er) on my arms, chest and shoulders but very loose on my stomach. Jeans I go for a 36"x36-34"" but need a bigger pant because of my legs and glutes, meanwhile I'll have several inches of space around my stomach/hips if I were to pull the jeans away. 34s would be too damn tight for my legs and butt.
