harridan: I’m 56 years old. Damn straight I’m wearing a bikini this summer.

[MatureDJ]

https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/2022/05/02/body-positivity-wearing-bikini-summer/

Would you hit it?

 

[MatureDJ]

For those who can't get past the paywall:

Summer is coming, friends. You know what this means. Bikinis.

I’m 56. Like most American women, I’ve grappled with body positivity my whole life. My mother, a college athlete who never dieted, preached that natural thinness was a God-given A+ and muffin-tops a failing grade. My first published article was about surviving anorexia as a college freshman. Working in the New York fashion magazine industry, I got negative reinforcement about the size of my boobs and butt from every Vogue cover and Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition.

Bikinis — such a frothy, exotic word — always made me feel like a vampire facing a clove of garlic.

It’s not just me. When Deborah Copaken, a friend and author of the memoir “Ladyparts,” was in her 20s, she wore a bikini, albeit reluctantly. She always felt self-conscious running into the water, she told me, her thighs jiggling behind her, her butt cheeks exposed. Why couldn’t she dress for the beach like a man? They never worried about such things.

In her 40s, rather than don the thongs modeled on the beach by the likes of Gisele Bündchen, Copaken switched to women’s surfer shorts. In her 50s, after the end of a 23-year marriage, a burst appendix, three childbirths, one near death from vaginal cuff dehiscence, and painful infidelity, she fled to Greece with three girlfriends to regroup and heal. There, she noticed women (and men) of all ages and sizes wearing tiny triangular patches of swimsuit fabric, no matter the droop of their thighs.

“I decided f--- it,” Copaken says now. “If my soft arms, jiggly ass and stomach scars bother you, that’s your problem, not mine.” She switched back to bikinis. “I don’t want to spend a single minute of the life I have left worrying about my body.”

Our culture seems to insist that women abhor our own skin. Research shows that a whopping 45 percent of teens have pondered cosmetic surgery; 40 to 60 percent of elementary school girls worry they are becoming “too fat”; and more than 80 percent of women are “sometimes” or “very often”on a diet to skinny up.
We’re pressured to hide our bodies from the masses: The horror of a woman breastfeeding! Strolling on the beach with cellulite bared! Parading her aging thighs under a miniskirt! And forget it if we exhibit the scars of a mastectomy, nursing or childbearing, not to mention wrinkles and sagging neck flesh. Even the feminist icon Nora Ephron famously said, “If anyone young is reading this, go, right this minute, put on a bikini, and don’t take it off until you’re 34.”

Thirty-four? Ouch. I can’t remember 34.

Both Mom and Nora have been dead for a decade. Like Copaken, I’ve made progress over my 56 years, facing down the cellulite demons and an entire planet adamant that women’s bodies must be invisible or covered up. Surprisingly, some of my acceptance comes from listening to men and looking at my body the way they do, rather than comparing myself to Instagram beach pix.
At 50, I got divorced and dated younger men, who were enthusiastic about my body. This is what these wise, appreciative men showed me: There is nothing more beautiful (or sexier) than a woman who is comfortable in her own skin. Every woman, of any age, has nice body parts. Collarbones? Wrists? Knees? Earlobes? We’ve all got our lovelies. Even the parts we’ve been trained to hate most have something going for them: Cellulite is soft as silk against the skin. If only Anna Wintour had told us!

I urge you to tackle this quest: Whatever your age, choose a swim costume that works for you. Game for the bikini? Rock it. But perhaps it’s not a conventional bathing suit. Maybe consider a swim dress or a gauzy wrap. Push yourself to find fabric or a mind-set that helps you make your way to the pool, beach or lake.

As for moi, I have a new crocheted bikini with a special stomach panel that covers the evidence of my three 8-pound babies and accentuates my Kim Kardashian booty. In my dreams (if I squint), it makes my legs look a little like Iman’s.
Or there’s another option. My most beautiful friend, a grandmother in her late 70s, hates bathing suits so passionately that she only swims naked. Mostly late at night in private pools. Occasionally in a deserted lake. She says she’s too old to endure the torture devices designed to deprive older women of the simple joys of swimming, frolicking and enjoying our birthrights — the bodies that nature gave us.
So if you’re brave enough (and won’t get arrested), why not take her lead? This summer, get in the water and show everyone everything.

 

[Doctor Europeo]

Even if I wanted to, she probably wont pass the boner test.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Ew gross.

 

[RickTheToad]

Better than Lizzo.

 

[lost_blackbird]

I'm good thanks....

 

[SW15]

She's not that great for a 56 year old. She has a pudgy midsection. I wouldn't be interested in the slightest bit.

She said "At 50, I got divorced and dated younger men, who were enthusiastic about my body."

What younger man would be enthusiastic about the 50-53 year old version of that? This goes to show how thirsty men are. Also, these younger men who were pursuing this early 50s woman were likely 35-42, which is near supposed peak male SMV. I never believed that late 30s was peak SMV for most men. I can't imagine a 20-30 year old having sex with her when she was in her early 50s.

 

[2Rocky]

I spent 3 days at a pool in a Desert resort town. I can guarantee you that woman has better muscle tone than 75% of the women there YOUNGER THAN HER.

Here's a newsflash ...We all are going to age... Quit being so judgemental about how many summers someone else has experienced and focus on yourself. The day will come when that woman is out of your league. So work on yourself.

Guys, no matter how ripped you are now you are one ACL tear and 6 months away from a beer gut.

I'll leave you with this....

 

[derringerG]

I thought this was gonna be a garbage thread and in a certain way it is...but sadly, we are going to see this meme hitting harder and harder and more and more frequently.

Believe it or not, older women may slowly be becoming more and more of a "commodity." I've definitely seen this in suburban neighborhoods where rich older divorced ladies who go to the gym and maybe have a nip and tuck or two can look attractive in a dark club or bar. These women can attract younger 20's and 30's aged men in this situation but they never become a couple in public during the day. Things are changing.

This weekend, I saw a college aged kid with a woman old enough to be his mom, or even his grandmother. However, she was snuggling on his shoulder and they were clearly a couple. I tried so hard not to do a double take but couldn't help myself. Dude wasn't ashamed at all, he had a proud smirk on his face actually.

There's a 5% chance it was an incestuous couple but more likely he was some desperate college kid with an older woman.

Sh#t's getting strange beyond comprehension.

As far as the woman pictured, she looks like jabba the hut in a wig.

 

[Stuffnu]

Extreme thirst from men don’t stop with women in there 30’s or 40’s…

 

[Who Dares Win]

It's like eating left over pizza from 3 days ago...it takes a strong gut and a lot of hunger.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Any woman in my zip code that’s 40-50 in good shape easily gets cubs, they’re like ants. Welcome to the generation raised on Cougar/MILF pr0n.

 

[MatureDJ]

Better than Lizzo.

Who is Lizzo?