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More Red flags with FWB?

SargeMaximus

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Hey guys, just checking my work so to speak. Based on what happened last night with my fwb I figure nexting is the right course of action. but since I want to make sure I’m not over reacting I figured I’d post it here for your feedback:

The issue is this: after we had sex we watched some Netflix. Finishing the movie we watched the previous time. Then after it was over she suggested the movie “The Generals Daughter” which I have never seen before. Well the movie is about rape. So that was bizarre. Like, what made her think that was a good movie to watch with a fwb?

And then after the movie is over it was late so we went to bed and then she’s trying to get all frisky and sexual and I’m like “yo we just watched a movie about rape, I’m not turned on in the slightest right now” and she gets all pouty and angry. So yeah, not sure what any of that is about but I think it’s best to just not go there and stay far away.
 

Billtx49

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Three possibilities I see,
1 She likes the actor John Travolta
2 She has fantasies about rape or forced/controlled sex
3 She likes to watch murder mystery movies

All the above are basically harmless
Why?
1 John’s not in bed with her, you are
2 Buy some handcuffs or rope you’re the man, you always control the action
3 Make her wonder if you died and when your next date is
 

AttackFormation

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Im going to say this plainly. Based on this thread, and this thread, you come off to me as being "autistic". Either that or you are trolling both us and the women, but that would not be a favorable review either.
 

SargeMaximus

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Im going to say this plainly. Based on this thread, and this thread, you come off to me as being "autistic". Either that or you are trolling both us and the women, but that would not be a favorable review either.
Funny you say that. Years ago I thought I might be and I got myself tested for autism. I just barely stayed in the “normal” scale. It is what it is.
 

AttackFormation

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Funny you say that. Years ago I thought I might be and I got myself tested for autism. I just barely stayed in the “normal” scale. It is what it is.
Im not surprised, if this is wired into your brain then i dont know what i could say to help you. I just find it incredible that these women are having sex with you, but yet other men who are not autistic can be in dry spells. You must have some solid looks, because from what i can tell, it's not your personality theyre going for - just being real with you mate.
 

SargeMaximus

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Im not surprised, if this is wired into your brain then i dont know what i could say to help you.
So why show up at all? Make fun of the autistic kid is it? Have I mentioned I’ve fvcked more than my fair share of women? Isnt the point of this forum to overcome whatever obstacles we as men face? How is autism any different?
 

AttackFormation

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So why show up at all? Make fun of the autistic kid is it? Have I mentioned I’ve fvcked more than my fair share of women? Isnt the point of this forum to overcome whatever obstacles we as men face? How is autism any different?
You already refused to heed any of the multitude of good advice you got in that other thread i listed, so im gonna turn the tables on you and ask you why this thread would be any different and what the point of creating it was? Do you recognise that you are in need of help or not?
 

SargeMaximus

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You already refused to heed any of the multitude of good advice you got in that other thread i listed, so im gonna turn the tables on you and ask you why this thread would be any different and what the point of creating it was? Do you recognise that you are in need of help or not?
Oh so I didn’t take your advice in the last thread and you’re butthurt is that it?

The point of this current thread was to see if I’m over reacting with my nearly autistic brain. I recognize I take things too literally and seriously so I wanted to double check with you guys. Thanks to the other two, I have my answer and I’ve already moved on. Not every thread is a monumental Jordan Peterson-level calamity of existentialism
 

AttackFormation

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Oh so I didn’t take your advice in the last thread and you’re butthurt is that it?

The point of this current thread was to see if I’m over reacting with my nearly autistic brain. I recognize I take things too literally and seriously so I wanted to double check with you guys. Thanks to the other two, I have my answer and I’ve already moved on. Not every thread is a monumental Jordan Peterson-level calamity of existentialism
I didnt write anything in your last thread.

Whether you 'over'react or not is only one part of the equation. The other is that she is communicating, but covertly, and so it is right to react to it. But it matters how you react, not just how much. When you connect the dots of the situation it's obvious that she, like many women, has fantasies about rape. And since she figured you were gonna have sex again after, she put that movie on at that time to create a sexual mood. You have to recognise this in order to learn something from this situation, because if you just think you "overreacted", you still wont understand what she is trying to communicate with you in the future.

I think it could be a good idea to briefly explain this condition to the women you see, so that when situations like this occur, the hard feelings from both sides will be mitigated.
 

SargeMaximus

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I didnt write anything in your last thread.

Whether you 'over'react or not is only one part of the equation. The other is that she is communicating, but covertly, and so it is right to react to it. But it matters how you react, not just how much. When you connect the dots of the situation it's obvious that she, like many women, has fantasies about rape. And since she figured you were gonna have sex again after, she put that movie on at that time to create a sexual mood. You have to recognise this in order to learn something from this situation, because if you just think you "overreacted", you still wont understand what she is trying to communicate with you in the future.

I think it could be a good idea to briefly explain this condition to the women you see, so that when situations like this occur, the hard feelings from both sides will be mitigated.
I’m not sure what you mean. The only reacting I did was refuse sex. My reaction after I was home was to next her but I didn’t text her because I thought that might be an over reaction.

I did connect the dots but my dot connecting was more in lines of her claiming I get off on rape and then pulling a #MeToo. That’s what I was concerned about.

We have talked about sexual fantasies before and very open about what we both like and dislike and rape fantasy never came up. Perhaps I’ll ask her directly.

Just don’t assume you know everything from a brief topic I make.
 

AttackFormation

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I’m not sure what you mean. The only reacting I did was refuse sex. My reaction after I was home was to next her but I didn’t text her because I thought that might be an over reaction.

I did connect the dots but my dot connecting was more in lines of her claiming I get off on rape and then pulling a #MeToo. That’s what I was concerned about.

We have talked about sexual fantasies before and very open about what we both like and dislike and rape fantasy never came up. Perhaps I’ll ask her directly.

Just don’t assume you know everything from a brief topic I make.
Yea sure, and im the king of Russia. You can make up all the bullshyt you want to save face on an internet forum when your ego gets pricked, but you cant fool reality. I am putting you on ignore, and if these women are really having sex with you as you are claiming to us but i doubt, then it's truly amazing and to be fair they only have themselves to blame.
 

SargeMaximus

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Yea sure, and im the king of Russia. You can make up all the bullshyt you want to save face on an internet forum when your ego gets pricked, but you cant fool reality. I am putting you on ignore, and if these women are really having sex with you as you are claiming to us but i doubt, then it's truly amazing.
Struck a nerve I see. At least I dont get butthurt. Bye bye princess
 

PRW63

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Hey guys, just checking my work so to speak. Based on what happened last night with my fwb I figure nexting is the right course of action.
FWB, by definition is not a relationship. Therefore Red Flags don't mean anything more than they would mean with any person you met in any context. Anything pertaining to a "relationship" is irrelevant in a FWB. Don't confuse FWB with Casual Dating (Plate Spinning). Casual Dating is a step above FWB. FWB is basically "nothing".

So if you want to "next" her, then do it. But the fact that you are asking implies that you are treating this as Casual Dating (
or more) rather than a FWB.
 

SargeMaximus

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FWB, by definition is not a relationship. Therefore Red Flags don't mean anything more than they would mean with any person you met in any context. Anything pertaining to a "relationship" is irrelevant in a FWB. Don't confuse FWB with Casual Dating (Plate Spinning). Casual Dating is a step above FWB. FWB is basically "nothing".

So if you want to "next" her, then do it. But the fact that you are asking implies that you are treating this as Casual Dating (
or more) rather than a FWB.
I see. I mean I do have the ultimate goal in mind of having multiple long term relationships. But I also don’t like the serious relationship stuff and just want them to be sex first and foremost. So whatever label that is, then that’s what it is. I call her a fwb because we are friends that fvck.

Edit: as for the “red flag” question. There are things that are red flags regardless of relationship status or label. I was just wondering if it was a symptom of her trying to frame me for a me too claim or something. It was so subtle but also very obvious that I noticed and figured it could be she was that type of person.

Much in the same way if you catch a girl in a blatant lie I would say that is a red flag regardless of if you are fwbs or not.

Red flags, to me, speak to toxic or malevolent personalities
 

devilkingx2

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The issue is this: after we had sex we watched some Netflix. Finishing the movie we watched the previous time. Then after it was over she suggested the movie “The Generals Daughter” which I have never seen before. Well the movie is about rape. So that was bizarre. Like, what made her think that was a good movie to watch with a fwb?
1. When I googled that movie it says it's a thriller/mystery, so maybe that got her excited.

2. Maybe she chose a random movie neither of you would care about, if she picked her favorite or your favorite movie one of you would be too distracted to talk or have sex.

3. It's a movie, you're not supposed to take it so seriously.

4. There's a slim remote possibility that there's some dark undertones to her personality/psychology where rape & murder gets her going but everyone has weird fetishes so that's fine unless it's part of a long series of red flags about that sort of thing.
 
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