Catching Feelings for Orbiter

[JAGH888]

Hi all,

I’m posting this to reach out to the bro’s.

I was in an LTR, dumped, it’s whatever, we move.

Been meeting with some orbiters, might be catching feeling for one of them but not entirely sure if it’s just off the back of the LTR.

Slap some sense into me.
What do I do?

 

[Barrister]

Hi all,

I’m posting this to reach out to the bro’s.

I was in an LTR, dumped, it’s whatever, we move.

Been meeting with some orbiters, might be catching feeling for one of them but not entirely sure if it’s just off the back of the LTR.

Slap some sense into me.
What do I do?

Need more information about the orbiter to know for sure. But if you just got out of the LTR you need some time before developing “feelings” for anyone unless it’s just for fun. You should dial it back IMO.

 

[JAGH888]

Need more information about the orbiter to know for sure. But if you just got out of the LTR you need some time before developing “feelings” for anyone unless it’s just for fun. You should dial it back IMO.

Orbiter was someone I knew for a couple years prior to my LTR, when I felt my relationship dying I almost reached out, just let her know she was on the radar. Have hooked up with her a few times over the last couple weeks, I’m not instigating.

Should I dial it back by ghosting? Making myself less available etc?

 

[TheProspect]

Detach and step back from this particular chick. Does the thought of doing so make you hesitate? If so, you're probably emotionally invested to some degree.

Be mindful that you're also rebounding and seeking to fill a void that the end of your LTR left. You're operating from an already emotionally compromised position, so your judgement will be clouded.

What do you do? It's probably easier to tell you what to not do: Do not put yourself in a position where you're going to get attached to a rebound chick.

That's a simplistic answer, and it's easier said than done, but the last thing you need after the dissolution of a relationship is to get immediately attached to another woman.

 

[Barrister]

Orbiter was someone I knew for a couple years prior to my LTR, when I felt my relationship dying I almost reached out, just let her know she was on the radar. Have hooked up with her a few times over the last couple weeks, I’m not instigating.

Should I dial it back by ghosting? Making myself less available etc?

If you can keep hooking up without developing feelings I would. It’ll help immensely with getting over the LTR. But if you’re just going to end up dating this chick (aka a rebound) because you’re trying to fill an emotional void from your LTR I would dial it back. You’ll make things even worse for yourself and it ultimately will be a crash and burn with the new chick.

 

[JAGH888]

If you can keep hooking up without developing feelings I would. It’ll help immensely with getting over the LTR. But if you’re just going to end up dating this chick (aka a rebound) because you’re trying to fill an emotional void from your LTR I would dial it back. You’ll make things even worse for yourself and it ultimately will be a crash and burn with the new chick.

Appreciate that bro, thanks for replying!

 

[JAGH888]

Detach and step back from this particular chick. Does the thought of doing so make you hesitate? If so, you're probably emotionally invested to some degree.

Be mindful that you're also rebounding and seeking to fill a void that the end of your LTR left. You're operating from an already emotionally compromised position, so your judgement will be clouded.

What do you do? It's probably easier to tell you what to not do: Do not put yourself in a position where you're going to get attached to a rebound chick.

That's a simplistic answer, and it's easier said than done, but the last thing you need after the dissolution of a relationship is to get immediately attached to another woman.

If they get attached, telling them you’re not into it other than casual is the way to go?
Definitely going to follow this advice here, much appreciated brother.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Feelings don’t matter. Talk yourself into this belief. Dealing with women comes down to practical choices. Does this chick add value to your life right now?

 

[Gstring]

How meaningful are your feelings if you fall in love with every girl that is willing to talk to you and is within your vicinity. Your feelings don't mean anything and nobody needs them.

 

[deadmasterx]

The fact that you just got out of a LTR says too much about the whole situation. I understand that you're emotionally sensitive because of the whole situation, and it's completely normal that both guys and girls tend to seek someone as "rebound" for these feelings that are still there, but not getting reciprocate. In general, it means that you'll want to move on to a relationship because of the unique experience that only a relationship can give you, your brain is craving for that.

The idea is, the less you need a relationship, the better and more ready you are for it. I'd tell you to take your time, study more about your own feelings and try to find if they're a "abstinence" urge or actually true feelings for one of the girls you're dating. I mean, you're in the dating game, of course you'll meet a lot of awesome women that's gonna give you such a good time that you'll be thinking about marrying them right away, but slow down. Keep on dating and talking to yourself in this matter, get you "****" together and then make a decision. Don't act from a place of neediness, the results are never good.

 

[Focal core]

Need more information about the orbiter to know for sure. But if you just got out of the LTR you need some time before developing “feelings” for anyone unless it’s just for fun. You should dial it back IMO.

This.. Mostly listen to all of man here.. Most of them given a very accurate answer.