Greg Adams on how dating changed in the last decades.

[oldmanofthesea]

yeah, see: oldman's post. Add to that a bad gender ratio.

@mrgoodstuff People in the NW are so self righteous, if your front bumper is a quarter inch over the white line at a crosswalk of an intersection, you are likely to have your car spat on or a guy literally put his hand through your open window and wave it in your eye as he screams bloody murder at you. Bicyclists will kick your car as they pass and keep on riding. If you arrive at the front door of a store at about the same time as some frumpy 60yo woman and you smile and open the door for her, she’ll look at you like, “Who the Fvck are you and what do you want from me?!” If you thought SF had a homelessness problem, you should see the NW.... it’s like a whole intentional lifestyle subculture. I’ve never experienced road rage like in the NW.

Most big cities in the NW are very safe and very clean and the quality of life is very high. My personal belief is that people have so little to worry about there that they have to literally invent things to be upset about. So they just don’t let sh*t go.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

@mrgoodstuff People in the NW are so self righteous, if your front bumper is a quarter inch over the white line at a crosswalk of an intersection, you are likely to have your car spat on or a guy literally put his hand through your open window and wave it in your eye as he screams bloody murder at you. Bicyclists will kick your car as they pass and keep on riding. If you arrive at the front door of a store at about the same time as some frumpy 60yo woman and you smile and open the door for her, she’ll look at you like, “Who the Fvck are you and what do you want from me?!” If you thought SF had a homelessness problem, you should see the NW.... it’s like a whole intentional lifestyle subculture. I’ve never experienced road rage like in the NW.

Most big cities in the NW are very safe and very clean and the quality of life is very high. My personal belief is that people have so little to worry about there that they have to literally invent things to be upset about. So they just don’t let sh*t go.

Pretentious and snooty

 

[Lookatu]

High value men still controlled the top 20% of women and also sexually used those women who thought they had them as a relationship option for sex only......making their "abundance of men" through OLD, fb, etc merely a mirage. Now we have a large % of the women over 30 who are bitter because their worth is nill and they have been pumped and dumped over and over.

Truth right there. I wish more women realized that most guys only want sex out of them unless they can demonstrate value from their end as well and improve themselves. They are only hurting themselves in this regard.

 

[BadBoy89]

Women were loyal back when because they were dependent on men. It was this dependency that made them loyal, submissive, feminine. Now, women are more educated, more independent, have more freedom, make more money, more valuable than men according to society, media, music, and tv. Combine this with the law siding with the women in almost all circumstances, women have no reason to be loyal, respectful, or feminine. They only have a reason to be happy.

Remember men, women don't care about "quality" men anymore. Quality does not matter to them. All the stuff that mattered back in the 1950s is moot now. They can get it themselves. And if they don't want to, the state will get it for them.

What matters now for women is the man's genetics (height, hair) his usefulness, his novelty, his famousness. This is why we keep saying all a man should do is aim to have sex with her as soon as possible. Everything else is on her to build.

Come on men.

 

[Solomon]

Same as always outside of the club scene. By 2015 the club scene really stopped being a meat market for the most part, was just a place for women to AW and then go home with some dude she already had programmed in her phone (outside of Vegas/Ibiza/Mykonos type places).

I was never that great at the club thing back then but I would at least get a decent opportunity to make an impression prior to then.

IMO the club scene in my city truly died 2010....sure bars/clubs are still hopping until covid but it wasn't like before
Back in the day if you were in a "drought" and need a "slumpbuster" there 2-3 places you knew you could go.
Now? maybe 1. After covid I see the night scene getting worse but who knows maybe people will go out my city is cold/snow 6 months out of the year so I can see people going crazy

 

[Glassguy]

Women were loyal back when because they were dependent on men. It was this dependency that made them loyal, submissive, feminine. Now, women are more educated, more independent, have more freedom, make more money, more valuable than men according to society, media, music, and tv. Combine this with the law siding with the women in almost all circumstances, women have no reason to be loyal, respectful, or feminine. They only have a reason to be happy.

Remember men, women don't care about "quality" men anymore. Quality does not matter to them. All the stuff that mattered back in the 1950s is moot now. They can get it themselves. And if they don't want to, the state will get it for them.

What matters now for women is the man's genetics (height, hair) his usefulness, his novelty, his famousness. This is why we keep saying all a man should do is aim to have sex with her as soon as possible. Everything else is on her to build.

Come on men.

I would agree that a few of your points apply to liberal women/feminists/me toos but I assure you that conservative women still value high quality men.

And I don't touch the liberal/feminists/me too movement women. No thanks.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

I was last single in 2005. Became single again late ‘18. Honestly, other than tech (OLD, social media, iPhones), I didn’t find it that different. Women seem about the same (maybe a touch more aggressive). Club and bar scene was a bit decreased from 2005, but still viable. Even dating via work was similar. The tech (OLD, SM...) just seemed to amp things up, and frankly, made meeting women even easier. When I first began navigating being single again, I thought #me2 would be a factor. Hasn’t been. Some minor differences I’ve seen is the increase in ‘White-Knighting’ by some men. Women being OK with being FWBs or ‘side chicks’. I’ve noticed a rather greater number of my younger, male coworkers seem single. Even though they’re normal looking guys who aren’t weird.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

@oldmanofthesea It most definitely is harder now than years ago. There was a period of time where I could’ve sworn I had autism, and I still was able to get a girlfriend. I just had people around me. Now, even with all the knowledge and skills and tools at my disposal, I’m practically an incel lmao. Granted, I don’t drink or do drugs or anything like that, and I quit social media when I was 15, and it is covid after all, but still.

And @Glassguy there is absolutely no way that the top 20% of guys control 80% of women. You mean to tell me that 1 in 5 guys you see walking down the street are slaying poon like a king? Not a chance in hell.



Environment is king, end of. It’s just that our environment has become überfvcked since Western culture has become übercucked.

 

[BMX]

The pandemic exposed nearly everyone and everything. It's almost over now. The kettle is about to explode. The well is drying up. Wall-hitters are painting murals on The Wall but that s hit is still the undefeated WBO/WBA/IBF/WBC unified-champion of the world. CGA at it again with more truth bombs.

 

[RangerMIke]

Social media,the internet and smart phones have made a huge impact. Anyone who denies this needs to have their head checked.

Disruptive technology always changes human dynamics, until society adjusts to the new reality. We are just in a period of adjustment. Gun powder, Printing press, postal service, railroads, telegraph, telephones, radio, cars, air travel, TV, cable, internet, smart phones.... it always happens. Society is always slow to adjust to technological change.... but society always adjusts.

What is happening with women and smart phone social media is that women are still placing a lot of value on validation. 50 years ago, when a woman got attention it was significant, increased attention always lead to something good. Women had to work for attention, so it had value. Today... well validation is really meaningless... it is an illusion... validation does not lead to anything meaningful other than to give you a shot of dopamine. Eventually women will realize that since it takes no effort it has no value. We just aren't there yet.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

Disruptive technology always changes human dynamics, until society adjusts to the new reality.

I agree with this but am wondering if and how society will adjust to certain new realities. Your post yesterday inspired me to create an OT thread about this in the “Anything Else” forum. Would be very interested in your thoughts on that thread because it sounds like something you’ve been thinking about too.

 

[Glassguy]

And @Glassguy there is absolutely no way that the top 20% of guys control 80% of women. You mean to tell me that 1 in 5 guys you see walking down the street are slaying poon like a king? Not a chance in hell.

I guarantee it. I will show you-

Both men and women that are 8's will date 7s and 9's with the occasional 10. Also the occasional 6 (FWB).

Any woman that is a 9/10 can date any man that is below a 7. Unless he is gay. Same with men who are 9s and 10s.

However, you are not going to find 9's dating 3s and 3s dating 9s. Just not gonna happen.

8/10 is 80% my man. I didnt just pull those numbers out of my hat.

A 10 would be high appearance, social status/fame, high financial stability.
1 is a fat pos with no job, few friends and not even his own momma doesnt love him much.
Then you have everything in between.

The top 20% can date down to that lower 80% with no problem. But not vice versa. So yes its controlled by the top 20%.

 

[Lookatu]

What is happening with women and smart phone social media is that women are still placing a lot of value on validation.

Today... well validation is really meaningless... it is an illusion... validation does not lead to anything meaningful other than to give you a shot of dopamine. Eventually women will realize that since it takes no effort it has no value. We just aren't there yet.

I have personally started witnessing this shift gradually happening. I've heard quite a few girls from OLD saying they are looking for quality over quantity and have begun to realize that all those likes or matches they receive does not mean much to them as it once did. I think everyone has to get over that novelty hump before reality sets in and they can see through the trees.

 

[Glassguy]

What is happening with women and smart phone social media is that women are still placing a lot of value on validation. 50 years ago, when a woman got attention it was significant, increased attention always lead to something good. Women had to work for attention, so it had value. Today... well validation is really meaningless... it is an illusion... validation does not lead to anything meaningful other than to give you a shot of dopamine. Eventually women will realize that since it takes no effort it has no value. We just aren't there yet.

I totally agree with your point about value on validation but one thing hasnt changed: women generations ago looked at attention from low value men as creepy and from high value men as valuable. The higher the value of the man, the higher worth of his attention. That part hasnt changed.

 

[RangerMIke]

I agree with this but am wondering if and how society will adjust to certain new realities. Your post yesterday inspired me to create an OT thread about this in the “Anything Else” forum. Would be very interested in your thoughts on that thread because it sounds like something you’ve been thinking about too.

Good question, and really it all depends on the culture. But history proves examples of how disruptive technology was handled.

First: Society attempts to ban the technology.
Second: They attempt to regulate it by either making it too expensive by creating artificial monopolies and scarcity.
Third: People find was around the limits, alternate (black markets) are created.
Forth: Alternative or Black Markets increases demand making the tech more profitable
Fifth: The technology explodes into wide use.
Sixth: Society goes through rapid change.
Seventh: The slow process of integration occurs and eventually normalization into a new paradigm results.
Eighth: This change creates new change, then we go back to First.

In free societies, or societies with lots of competition, these steps happen rapidly. This is us. Right now we are in Seventh .... what the Eighth will look like is unclear. But you can look at history to get some clues.

Recent history you can look to portable music. At first when cassette recorders were produced. The music industry tried to ban them, and created "8 Track" products which were inferior... they tried to ban cassette recorders, when this didn't work the music industry started producing their own cassette products... but the quality of cassette recorders improved, and copies of albums became widespread. Then the music industry tried to impose a 'tax' on all blank cassette tapes... this didn't happen, so then they adopted CDs... well, eventually CD copying technology was available... the industry attempted to compensate for their loss in revenue by increasing the price of CDs... this just accelerated the process of copying... which resulted in the development of MP-3, then came Napster and internet file sharing... they successfully shut down Napster, but the cat was out of the bag... and now few people buy CDs anymore... the industry embraced on-line music and companies like Spotify emerged.... anyway... with music being widely available, there is a renaissance of vinyl LPs and turn tables.. as the actual quality of music became important again.

I believe male - female relationships will follow the same path. Sure there will always be those that do not care about 'quality' and continue to take advantage of cheap validation... but eventually this will play out... and women will realize that it is much better to have a handful of quality men in their lives than 100 low quality orbiters .... but this will take time.

 

[RangerMIke]

I totally agree with your point about value on validation but one thing hasnt changed: women generations ago looked at attention from low value men as creepy and from high value men as valuable. The higher the value of the man, the higher worth of his attention. That part hasnt changed.

Yep... However, in this female trait rests hope of improvement.

Human nature is such that we fear loss more than we hope for potential gain ( a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush). Eventually women will figure out how to screen men better for what they want. Right now they are getting hit on by a multitude of men... a vast majority of which they do not want... so they are just weeding out everyone. This is why they can't find relationships that satisfy them. Eventually they get sick of this, and end up with some dude that isn't working for them, over time this goes sideways because she just isn't feeling it.

I suspect what will happen, is since women are gaining more political control... will figure out female behavior is detrimental to society and begin to place controls on female nature for the sake of civilization. It will be a tough love approach... and it will be messy. Men can not do this because it will be categorized as 'misogyny', it will have to be women... and they will do this because the alternative is a complete breakdown of culture.... because it will be chicks doing this it will be chaos... with lots of bumps, but it will happen.

Soooo what has to happen is we have to have complete disruption... rather than trying to fight all this we just have to let chaos happen... we all just have to look out for ourselves as best as we go through this.

 

[derby1]

I call it the Age of the Attention Wh-re.

yep my daughter at the age of 13 is the ODD One out , from creepy attention W behaviour.

Her mates do all the poses and have 2000 social media friends, my daughter has 50.

low and behold not one of them has a dad.

The Devolution has begun

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

I guarantee it. I will show you-

Both men and women that are 8's will date 7s and 9's with the occasional 10. Also the occasional 6 (FWB).

Any woman that is a 9/10 can date any man that is below a 7. Unless he is gay. Same with men who are 9s and 10s.

However, you are not going to find 9's dating 3s and 3s dating 9s. Just not gonna happen.

8/10 is 80% my man. I didnt just pull those numbers out of my hat.

A 10 would be high appearance, social status/fame, high financial stability.
1 is a fat pos with no job, few friends and not even his own momma doesnt love him much.
Then you have everything in between.

The top 20% can date down to that lower 80% with no problem. But not vice versa. So yes its controlled by the top 20%.

Let's be honest here:

Women who are below a 6 just don't matter. It's just reality. Sure there are guys with no standards or weird fetishes, but that's not exactly representative. This in and of itself gets rid of huge amounts of people from the dating spectrum. Also, any girl who's an 8 will be able to date ANY guy, even a 10. How consistently it is will depend on her personality, but no way in hell is she gonna settle for a 6, even dudes who are 7s are looked down on by women like this.

1 in 5 men are not drowning in pvssy my guy. I'm sorry, I just don't believe it.

 

[Glassguy]

Let's be honest here:

Women who are below a 6 just don't matter. It's just reality. Sure there are guys with no standards or weird fetishes, but that's not exactly representative. This in and of itself gets rid of huge amounts of people from the dating spectrum. Also, any girl who's an 8 will be able to date ANY guy, even a 10. How consistently it is will depend on her personality, but no way in hell is she gonna settle for a 6, even dudes who are 7s are looked down on by women like this.

1 in 5 men are not drowning in pussy my guy. I'm sorry, I just don't believe it.

Agree to disagree.

 

[derby1]

I totally agree with your point about value on validation but one thing hasnt changed: women generations ago looked at attention from low value men as creepy and from high value men as valuable. The higher the value of the man, the higher worth of his attention. That part hasnt changed.

not in 2020 they allow all men to creep over them. mentally messed up due to broken homes