CAPSLOCK BANDIT
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 29, 2020
- Messages
- 2,792
- Reaction score
- 2,125
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Just quote them and I'll provide contextI'm dying to ask @CAPSLOCK BANDIT about some of these I don't quite get, but I figure they're scenes from movies or tv shows I don't know
Yes, I must be identifying that way.Naw, you still identify as feminist.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
I get it if you want to make fun of me while doing it, have at it. My curiosity is always bigger than my ego.Just quote them and I'll provide context
If you can't handle civil discourse you can leave.Yes, I must be identifying that way.
Could be key to why I'm stubbornly not paying down debt sooner and becoming financially free with savings and investments?
Like, why don't I want to be free of that red flag and identify as a submissive homemaker?
No just quote what you do not understand, memes are built to be like inside jokesI get it if you want to make fun of me while doing it, have at it. My curiosity is always bigger than my ego.
Sorry, this one I don't quite get. Is this from a movie?
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Yes, I appreciate your encouragement. Don't think you believe I'm near the same wavelength as you. Caught some frostiness there. All good.If you can't handle civil discourse you can leave.
It's all good, I just recognized your posting style from Love Shack.Yes, I appreciate your encouragement. Don't think you believe I'm near the same wavelength as you. Caught some frostiness there. All good.
90 Day Fiance. Watch all of it, you won't regret it.Sorry, this one I don't quite get. Is this from a movie?
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.