Why would a girl accept her ex’s friend request after he’s told her he still has feelings?

[Sgthaytham]

Part of me thinks that she could have just ignored it but instead chose to accept it, therefore opening a channel of communication. Why do this?

 

[Mbuckets82]

How’d you find out? She tell you? How long you guys been dating?

 

[Sgthaytham]

How’d you find out? She tell you? How long you guys been dating?

A message he sent her a couple months ago... 9 months.

I see they’re friends on FB now.

 

[bcude]

You're leaving out alot of information. A girl or your gf? Since you're asking i assume it's your gf because otherwise you wouldn't invest the time and energy to post about it here and not care.
How do you know this, did she volunteer this information to you?
Who broke their relationship?
He told her he had feelings for her 9 months ago and she accepted his friend request now?

In any case, she doesn't respect the relationship she's in right now and this is the path to potentially cheating. Not acceptable.

 

[RangerMIke]

Because she's a chick. They always like to keep their options open... Women will always wonder about the guy they let 'get away' especially if she thinks she could get him back. I've seen this WAY too often. I know one women, just turned 30... kept this one dude strung along for 6 years while she chased her emotions with a guy she was seeing didn't turn into anything tangible. Sooooo when sh1t went sideways with her first choice, she ran to 'Strung Along Dude', who was more than happy to step in.

They got married after one of the shortest engagements I've ever seen, and now she's pregnant.... The poor bastard thinks he's lucky... really he's a consolation prize. I don't have the heart to tell him he should get a paternity test.

 

[Sgthaytham]

Because she's a chick. They always like to keep their options open... Women will always wonder about the guy they let 'get away' especially if she thinks she could get him back. I've seen this WAY too often. I know one women, just turned 30... kept this one dude strung along for 6 years while she chased her emotions with a guy she was seeing didn't turn into anything tangible. Sooooo when sh1t went sideways with her first choice, she ran to 'Strung Along Dude', who was more than happy to step in.

They got married after one of the shortest engagements I've ever seen, and now she's pregnant.... The poor bastard thinks he's lucky... really he's a consolation prize. I don't have the heart to tell him he should get a paternity test.

It’s her ex that ended it with her.

 

[Sgthaytham]

I

You're leaving out alot of information. A girl or your gf? Since you're asking i assume it's your gf because otherwise you wouldn't invest the time and energy to post about it here and not care.
How do you know this, did she volunteer this information to you?
Who broke their relationship?
He told her he had feelings for her 9 months ago and she accepted his friend request now?

In any case, she doesn't respect the relationship she's in right now and this is the path to potentially cheating. Not acceptable.

Been with her for 9 months, and I think it was 2 months ago when I saw the message from her ex. I don’t exactly know when she accepted the friend request or when he sent the request for that matter.

From what I know he broke up with her.

 

[backseatjuan]

Women have orbiters, men that fcked them, men that they had relationships with, men that never fcked them. They keep the doors open when they know guy that they are currently with will not be there forever.

 

[Robert28]

A girl isn’t going to turn down free attention. It’s like crack to them. The guy is stupid for going back to a girl that said she only wanted friendship. I wouldn’t worry if I were you, he doesn’t have a clue what he’s doing, he shouldn’t be a threat at all.

 

[bcude]

I


Been with her for 9 months, and I think it was 2 months ago when I saw the message from her ex. I don’t exactly know when she accepted the friend request or when he sent the request for that matter.

From what I know he broke up with her.

He dumped her, women can't handle rejection so she will secretly resent him for the rest of her life. But, the temptation to go back just to dump him will always be there. He holds the power dynamic between them two which puts him in the driver seat and the attraction is most probably there from her side which is spelling disaster for you if he has expressed his interest in her already.

The mere fact that your gf is choosing to accept a friend request on FB from the past that should be dead and buried is disrespectful to your current relationship and communicates that she's entertaining other options and should be expressed, by your actions.

A woman who admires, respects and loves you is not interested in what an ex has to say. She would just ignore him.

Wouldn't be suprised if she's cheated already. This is not just some random orbiter, this is a guy who used to fvck her before you until he kicked her to the curb which makes him easy to fvck again and now she's willing to engage with him. Ask yourself why? It's a ticking bomb.

If she would have ditched him the situation would have been very different.

 

[Sgthaytham]

He dumped her, women can't handle rejection so she will secretly resent him for the rest of her life. But, the temptation to go back just to dump him will always be there. He holds the power dynamic between them two which puts him in the driver seat and the attraction is most probably there from her side which is spelling disaster for you if he has expressed his interest in her already.

The mere fact that your gf is choosing to accept a friend request on FB from the past that should be dead and buried is disrespectful to your current relationship and communicates that she's entertaining other options and should be expressed, by your actions.

A woman who admires, respects and loves you is not interested in what an ex has to say. She would just ignore him.

Wouldn't be suprised if she's cheated already. This is not just some random orbiter, this is a guy who used to fvck her before you until he kicked her to the curb which makes him easy to fvck again and now she's willing to engage with him. Ask yourself why? It's a ticking bomb.

If she would have ditched him the situation would have been very different.

That’s the brutal honesty I needed. I’m through with her.

You’re right, she had a choice between going back to the ex or ignoring him, and she chose the former because she clearly still has feelings for him, just as he has for her.

I’m not going to call these last 2 months a waste of time, at least I’ve fully realised that it’s going nowhere fast.

I’ve had friends tell me that I shouldn’t worry that it’s just a friend request, but actions speak louder than words don’t they?

 

[darksprezzatura]

Who cares about the personal life of a random plate?

Keep spinning her and other women.

Ask her out and fvck her.

If she makes excuses, great, more to work on your life and to find five other chicks to fvck.

Withdraw attention on disrespect.

Reward her on emotional and sxxual investment.

Keep things fun, let her chase.

Decide, Soft Next or Hard Next.

Don't Hard Next a woman unless she's batsh!t crazy/dangerous to you physically.

Quit analysing her.

Sh!t be simple. Why don't you guys get it?

 

[Sgthaytham]

We’re

Who cares about the personal life of a random plate?

Keep spinning her and other women.

Ask her out and fvck her.

If she makes excuses, great, more to work on your life and to find five other chicks to fvck.

Withdraw attention on disrespect.

Reward her on emotional and sxxual investment.

Keep things fun, let her chase.

Decide, Soft Next or Hard Next.

Don't Hard Next a woman unless she's batsh!t crazy/dangerous to you physically.

Quit analysing her.

Sh!t be simple. Why don't you guys get it?

except we’re exclusive?

 

[Robert28]

He dumped her, women can't handle rejection so she will secretly resent him for the rest of her life. But, the temptation to go back just to dump him will always be there. He holds the power dynamic between them two which puts him in the driver seat and the attraction is most probably there from her side which is spelling disaster for you if he has expressed his interest in her already.

The mere fact that your gf is choosing to accept a friend request on FB from the past that should be dead and buried is disrespectful to your current relationship and communicates that she's entertaining other options and should be expressed, by your actions.

A woman who admires, respects and loves you is not interested in what an ex has to say. She would just ignore him.

Wouldn't be suprised if she's cheated already. This is not just some random orbiter, this is a guy who used to fvck her before you until he kicked her to the curb which makes him easy to fvck again and now she's willing to engage with him. Ask yourself why? It's a ticking bomb.

If she would have ditched him the situation would have been very different.

All true! But be prepared to be called controlling and jealous and insecure when you bring up these truths. You’ll be right, but she’s still going to turn it all on you and blame it all on you. “He was too jealous of every guy that talked to me, I couldn’t have friends, he’s so insecure. I need a mature man that lets me be me” Be prepared.

 

[darksprezzatura]

Exclusivity is game on hard mode.

It will never stop.

Plate spinning is a surefire way to keep a man's osessive ane crazy making oneitis in check.

If you knew it in your bones you could get hotter girls the moment she leaves, you'll stop analysing her and give 0 fvcks about her actions.

This is why being in an LTR needs someone with extremely rock solid frame as you (hopefully) are not spinning other women.

 

[Sgthaytham]

All true! But be prepared to be called controlling and jealous and insecure when you bring up these truths. You’ll be right, but she’s still going to turn it all on you and blame it all on you. “He was too jealous of every guy that talked to me, I couldn’t have friends, he’s so insecure. I need a mature man that lets me be me” Be prepared.

Who says I need to bring them up with her? I can just call it a day with her and walk away and avoid all the drama.

 

[Sgthaytham]

Exclusivity is game on hard mode.

It will never stop.

Plate spinning is a surefire way to keep a man's osessive ane crazy making oneitis in check.

If you knew it in your bones you could get hotter girls the moment she leaves, you'll stop analysing her and give 0 fvcks about her actions.

This is why being in an LTR needs someone with extremely rock solid frame as you (hopefully) are not spinning other women.

Why would I be “spinning” other women when I’m exclusive?

If I was on the dating scene, then I probably wouldn’t be fixated on just one woman, I would be keeping my choices open and meeting other women.

 

[Robert28]

Who says I need to bring them up with her? I can just call it a day with her and walk away and avoid all the drama.

Smart man.

 

[darksprezzatura]

Why would I be “spinning” other women when I’m exclusive?

If I was on the dating scene, then I probably wouldn’t be fixated on just one woman, I would be keeping my choices open and meeting other women.

That's what I'm saying.

Getting into an LTR in itself is a losing proposition cuz you're already the kept guy.

You are being swept into her frame.

Her action of the little friend request fb drama isn't the issue.

The issue is that it affects you.

This will seep through your actions if you don't correct your frame.

In my opinion you've lost the frame and should start talking to other girls, doing stuff for self improvement, goals mission whatever to get your game back on.

Not necessarily physically cheat, but just to get back that mindset of abundance.

 

[darksprezzatura]

Who says I need to bring them up with her? I can just call it a day with her and walk away and avoid all the drama.

This is great. If you are willing to walk away, that's goat status.

Just don't be too quick to next women. I've done that and lost opportunities with women who'd have slept with me sooner than later. I just didn't have patience and I usually like it that way.

My advice. Downgrade her to plate status. Talk to other girls. Get your **** together.