"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Post Shoulder Surgery - Building Shoulder Bulk

dr.harker

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I had a right and left shoulder surgery 9 years ago. Anterior dislocation right shoulder. Posterior on left. (I was a competitive swimmer for 10 years, which blows your shoulders out - very common),

Any suggestions for low impact shoulder exercises for building bulk. Particularly rear deltoids are very hard to engage/isolate.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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RickTheToad

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You should make an appt. with a licensed PT. You don't want to f uck around with two bad shoulders. You are just asking for trouble.
 

EyeBRollin

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I had a right and left shoulder surgery 9 years ago. Anterior dislocation right shoulder. Posterior on left. (I was a competitive swimmer for 10 years, which blows your shoulders out - very common),

Any suggestions for low impact shoulder exercises for building bulk. Particularly rear deltoids are very hard to engage/isolate.
Overhead Press and Chin Ups / Lat Pulldowns.
 

Staticus

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You should make an appt. with a licensed PT. You don't want to f uck around with two bad shoulders. You are just asking for trouble.
I totally agree with this. Especially if you’ve been stagnant for that amount of time as well. Go through a full PT protocol and be cleared by said PT to put you shoulders under load. After, consult with the PT on using strength bands and utilizing tabata/ time under tension (TUT) routines. I would then move onto light to moderate weight Range of motion exercises (ROM). Coming back from a shoulder injury is a slow and steady process, which you know. Be smart and careful, the size will come.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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dr.harker

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I totally agree with this. Especially if you’ve been stagnant for that amount of time as well. Go through a full PT protocol and be cleared by said PT to put you shoulders under load. After, consult with the PT on using strength bands and utilizing tabata/ time under tension (TUT) routines. I would then move onto light to moderate weight Range of motion exercises (ROM). Coming back from a shoulder injury is a slow and steady process, which you know. Be smart and careful, the size will come.
I’ve done band work for years. Started free weights again a few months ago. PT suggestion makes sense. Didn’t really think about having a pro do some load tests.
 

Staticus

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I’ve done band work for years. Started free weights again a few months ago. PT suggestion makes sense. Didn’t really think about having a pro do some load tests.
Just stay healthy. I’d make the PT routine. I know a lot of guys who go to PT 2-4 times a month who don’t have injuries, just go for maintenance. Look into flossing too. A lot of this is also literally at your finger tips. YouTube has so much free content it’s not even funny.
 

ImTheDoubleGreatest!

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Former swimmer here. Most swimmers I knew didn’t even have bad shoulders, they all had bad knees lol



I can pop my left shoulder out naturally and was able to do so at a young age. I only went to PT for it (and my back) last year.

Jeff Cavalier (ATHLEAN-X) on YouTube talks about external rotation a lot to the point where it’s become a meme in the comments on all his videos now lol. The guy is a physical therapist and trainer, so he really knows what’s up. The stuff he talks about is exactly the stuff they had me do at PT. They’re honestly all the same when you get down to it but yeah.

The best one for the rear delts that I can tell you are a modified version of facepulls. This is the one Jeff likes the most, and what every physical therapist has you do for rear delt/rotator cuff work. It’s like a regular facepull, except that instead of your hands finishing near your ears, they finish more outwards. Your elbows should not be bent onwards. Basically, it’s a regular facepull except that you elbow is at a 90 degree angle instead of say a 30 degree angle like in a normal one. Not sure if that’s making sense. It’s very similar to the W in YTWL’s (arms should be higher up tho).

Speaking of which, YTWLs are a great way to bulletproof your shoulders. I don’t do all of them but they're still very good. The reverse cable crossover one (the Y) is great imo because it works your lower traps as well which is something that most people ignore. Doing the regular T part is fine, but I like Y better.

The last one I do doesn’t realy have a name that I’m aware of lol. I use a cable where I angle myself ~45 degrees away from the machine (so say I’m doing my right arm—I angle myself ~45 degrees to the right) and do a raise. It’s not a sideways raise, it’s in the opposite direction of the pulley. So it’s not quite a raise, but it’s also not quite a straight-arm pulldown either. But yeah, that’s what I do.

Bulletproof your shoulders.
 

dr.harker

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Former swimmer here. Most swimmers I knew didn’t even have bad shoulders, they all had bad knees lol



I can pop my left shoulder out naturally and was able to do so at a young age. I only went to PT for it (and my back) last year.

Jeff Cavalier (ATHLEAN-X) on YouTube talks about external rotation a lot to the point where it’s become a meme in the comments on all his videos now lol. The guy is a physical therapist and trainer, so he really knows what’s up. The stuff he talks about is exactly the stuff they had me do at PT. They’re honestly all the same when you get down to it but yeah.

The best one for the rear delts that I can tell you are a modified version of facepulls. This is the one Jeff likes the most, and what every physical therapist has you do for rear delt/rotator cuff work. It’s like a regular facepull, except that instead of your hands finishing near your ears, they finish more outwards. Your elbows should not be bent onwards. Basically, it’s a regular facepull except that you elbow is at a 90 degree angle instead of say a 30 degree angle like in a normal one. Not sure if that’s making sense. It’s very similar to the W in YTWL’s (arms should be higher up tho).

Speaking of which, YTWLs are a great way to bulletproof your shoulders. I don’t do all of them but they're still very good. The reverse cable crossover one (the Y) is great imo because it works your lower traps as well which is something that most people ignore. Doing the regular T part is fine, but I like Y better.

The last one I do doesn’t realy have a name that I’m aware of lol. I use a cable where I angle myself ~45 degrees away from the machine (so say I’m doing my right arm—I angle myself ~45 degrees to the right) and do a raise. It’s not a sideways raise, it’s in the opposite direction of the pulley. So it’s not quite a raise, but it’s also not quite a straight-arm pulldown either. But yeah, that’s what I do.

Bulletproof your shoulders.
Dig the face pull stuff. Meeting with a PT to discuss. Thanks, from one swimmer to another.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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