39, divorced, new

[Mbuckets82]

Alright so I’m 39, divorced with kids. I’m doing the online thing and trying to adhere to all the rules of not texting and only communicating for the date. Just getting to that point is something else.

And also I’ve never really approached a woman outside of a school setting growing up, so where would I go for that? I don’t drink or go out and with work and the kids it’s a busy time.

And how much do I spend on the first date? I went on one a few weeks ago, dropped nearly 200, we bowled and had dinner. Still trying to guage her interest. I’ve gotten other numbers but again getting to the point of a date seems like I have to swim the English Channel.

And books I can read up on? I’m reading the rational male which I like.

Any help I appreciate.

Thanks!

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

Wuddup kuz?

82 mate, you got time. Under 40. Kids. You're free. RooshV is trying to find a wife after 40 and its going poor.

OLD is cucked. Single mother victimhood and low hanging fruit. Not saying goodbye and don't do it. I am saying, hedge your bet. Run game. Do cold approach.

Post divorce, BUSY YOURSELF.

CHECK rsd free tour. Check rsd inner circle. Again, its free. Take action. Change your life. I met Alex years ago. He said, it doesn't matter what moves you make. It matters that you are a man and you make moves. #goatStatus #money

Think for yourself. Seek sources. Vet. I like Stefan Molyneux but he's a trad cuck. I like Jordan Peterson but again, trad. Still great source. Read maps of meaning, 12 rules. Read rational male. Read red queen by matt riddle debunk female nature asap. Check out old school pua. The bare bones basic is money.

Make new friends. Meet new people. Game = chat upbeveryone. Dudesaare buds and wings. Girls you pull.

At 39, target 18-23. Fall back in 20s only.

 

[Mbuckets82]

Sounds like a great start. Thanks!

 

[lamath]

Doing more social things should help greatly.
Join a new gym take some classes cooking gardening etc.
Go out more with your friends

 

[Serenity]

And also I’ve never really approached a woman outside of a school setting growing up, so where would I go for that?

Sorry to state the obvious, the answer is everywhere. They are everywhere. Walking on the streets, in a shop, a cafe and anywhere you can imagine. The hard part isn't finding out where to go, it's figuring out how to not approach in ways that make them very uncomfortable. If you have some friends you could maybe meet someone through them, like friends of friends and such, that's how I met my wife.

And how much do I spend on the first date? I went on one a few weeks ago, dropped nearly 200, we bowled and had dinner.

How much you spend is irrelevant with regards to having good dates. If you only spent nearly 200 thinking it would improve your chances then that's a bad idea all around. It's a much better strategy to keep first dates cheap/free, if she's still into you then you can be little bit more assured she's actually interested in you and not just what you give her materialistically speaking.

The point of a first date for you is to get to know her, not impress her.

 

[Mbuckets82]

Sorry to state the obvious, the answer is everywhere. They are everywhere. Walking on the streets, in a shop, a cafe and anywhere you can imagine. The hard part isn't finding out where to go, it's figuring out how to not approach in ways that make them very uncomfortable. If you have some friends you could maybe meet someone through them, like friends of friends and such, that's how I met my wife.


How much you spend is irrelevant with regards to having good dates. If you only spent nearly 200 thinking it would improve your chances then that's a bad idea all around. It's a much better strategy to keep first dates cheap/free, if she's still into you then you can be little bit more assured she's actually interested in you and not just what you give her materialistically speaking.

The point of a first date for you is to get to know her, not impress her.

That was just the cost of it. I wasn’t throwing any money around. Cost of business and being fun I’ll chalk it up to. Just enjoyed more than she I guess. Haha. I def made some errors though at the end and after. Prob came across needy.

I def have to look into how to approach cuz I can prob come off weird at times.

 

[Spaz]

Just want to share my experience with the world on how I got my love back and saved my marriage… I was married for 6years with 2kids and we lived happily until things started getting ugly and we had fights and arguments almost every time… it got worse at a point that he filed for divorce… I tried my best to make him change his mind & stay with me because I love him so much and don’t want to loose him but everything just didn’t work out… he moved out of the house because it was a rented apartment and still went ahead to file for divorce… I pleaded and tried everything but still nothing worked. The breakthrough came when someone introduced me to this wonderful, great spell caster who eventually helped me out… I have never been a fan of things like this but just decided to try reluctantly because I was desperate and left with no choice… He did special prayers and used roots and herbs… Within 7 days he called me and was sorry for all the emotional trauma he had cost me, moved back to the house and we continue to live happily, the kids are happy too and we are expecting our third child… I have introduced him to a lot of couples with problems across the world and they have had good news… Just thought I should share my experience because I strongly believe someone out there need’s it… You can email him through his email address; ([email protected])

You should be ashamed for trying to earn a living by scamming people.

 

[Serenity]

That was just the cost of it. I wasn’t throwing any money around.

Spending $200 on a first date is way too much though, especially if you paid for her too. If you split everything it doesn't matter how much you spend, because you'd just be spending it on yourself. But if you pay for both of you it's a good possibility you just threw money out of the window.

If you're actively dating you can't spend $200 on every date, that will become very expensive, very fast. There are also many women out there who only go along for a free meal, picking cheap dates will filter those women out.

Save the expensive dinner and activities for when you're several dates in or at least agree to split the bill before the date. If they demand a man to pay, tell them to fvck off, I would.

 

[evan12]

Alright so I’m 39, divorced with kids. I’m doing the online thing and trying to adhere to all the rules of not texting and only communicating for the date. Just getting to that point is something else.

And also I’ve never really approached a woman outside of a school setting growing up, so where would I go for that? I don’t drink or go out and with work and the kids it’s a busy time.

And how much do I spend on the first date? I went on one a few weeks ago, dropped nearly 200, we bowled and had dinner. Still trying to guage her interest. I’ve gotten other numbers but again getting to the point of a date seems like I have to swim the English Channel.

And books I can read up on? I’m reading the rational male which I like.

Any help I appreciate.

Thanks!

• You need to recover your look , if you lost hair , implant some, if you gained weight loose it, go to gym to have some tuned body.
• Read Mystry method and Rationale male.
• Create field report thread and start approaching women, however if you need to work on your look, do that first before approaching.
• Have a job if you already dont have.

Until you provide more details I cannot give you more advice

 

[RickTheToad]

Go to a clothing store ask the ladies for some help. They love doing that sh!t. Then, say, I'd like to show my appreciation for your help with my clothes. When are you free to meetup for a drink some time? If she shots you down, no problem. Just say, that's cool, then walk away.

Baby steps my friend.

 

[Desdinova]

Alright so I’m 39, divorced with kids. I’m doing the online thing and trying to adhere to all the rules of not texting and only communicating for the date. Just getting to that point is something else.

Online dating is IMO the least efficient way to get a date. Being divorced with a child myself, I only used it during the times when I wasn't able to go out and meet women in person or if I had a lack of choices in my social circles. I was able to get about one date for every 30-50 women I messaged. Those are 5hitty numbers. In my social circles, my numbers were usually at worst 1 date for every 4 that I number closed, and it was rare that I'd hit my worst. My chances of getting a date were typically around 50%. Time is better spent interacting with real women.

And also I’ve never really approached a woman outside of a school setting growing up, so where would I go for that? I don’t drink or go out and with work and the kids it’s a busy time.

You go wherever. If you don't have any social situations where you can meet women, you need to create them. Find things that you're interested in (that women are also interested in) and take part in them. You can't get dates by saying "I don't do this" or "I don't do that". You don't need to drink alcohol when you go to a bar. Nobody's going to pour alcohol down your throat. Don't live your life according to the social norm. Do the things YOU want to do, and avoid the things you could care less for. Most importantly, you need to get out of your comfort zone and explore new things.

And how much do I spend on the first date? I went on one a few weeks ago, dropped nearly 200, we bowled and had dinner. Still trying to guage her interest. I’ve gotten other numbers but again getting to the point of a date seems like I have to swim the English Channel.

First dates should be cheap. If you're meeting a woman for the first time, a simple coffee date is all you need. If the coffee date goes well, take her out and do an activity. My first dates usually consisted of coffee, mini-golf, then store browsing. That's provided that I actually liked the girl. If I didn't like her, I wouldn't go past the coffee date.

And books I can read up on? I’m reading the rational male which I like.

The DJ Bible is your friend.

 

[Mbuckets82]

• You need to recover your look , if you lost hair , implant some, if you gained weight loose it, go to gym to have some tuned body.
• Read Mystry method and Rationale male.
• Create field report thread and start approaching women, however if you need to work on your look, do that first before approaching.
• Have a job if you already dont have.

Until you provide more details I cannot give you more advice

I haven’t stopped going to the gym, ex hated how I went.
I recently got a look I like with a beard and I have thick hair and straight teeth.
I’ve been in my field for 13 years and do well. Debt free except my house.

I’ll follow and read up. I’m listening to the book of pook and reading the red queen.

I have to get in social circles and start approaching women .

Age range? Earlier deezedbrah said early twenties, so yea? I thought I was too old for that group. But I’ll give it a whirl.

 

[lamath]

I haven’t stopped going to the gym, ex hated how I went.
I recently got a look I like with a beard and I have thick hair and straight teeth.
I’ve been in my field for 13 years and do well. Debt free except my house.

I’ll follow and read up. I’m listening to the book of pook and reading the red queen.

I have to get in social circles and start approaching women .

Age range? Earlier deezedbrah said early twenties, so yea? I thought I was too old for that group. But I’ll give it a whirl.

Im also 39 and id say my age range is 26+
Early 20 are boring af and most cant have an inteligent discussion.
Pump.and dump those one if you can