"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Signs and behaviors when dating or in a relationship that she is craaaazzzyyy

btownbuck2012

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So you have been through this too? Directly?

Other things that are eerily similar between this girl and other ex's: artsy, like to paint, can't sleep, even with half a bottle of sleeping pills. All have almost nothing but male friends.

The good thing is I'm focusing on healing AND now that I see a pattern between this one and some other ex's I'm learning how to spot them and avoid them right away.
YEah, been through two of em. The first chick was a narcissist the second was a borderline. The narcissist chick damn rear ruined my life but the bpd has caused a few problems as well. IMO the narcs are more crafty and cunning whereas a bpd is a loose cannon, they’ve got no problem destroying themselves in the process of destroying you AND they are also violent. Whereas an NPD will vanish into thin air and leave you doubting your entire reality. What’s particularly disgustin about Narcissits is they keep up the act for a long time. You won’t ever see it coming. But yeah, I’ve been through it and what you’re experiencing, again, is textbook. Like literally right out of a book, standardbehavior for dudes who have been through this.

I will say this. It was my own fault tho for getting involved with the bpd, after the narcissist relationship I did a lot of reading and thought if I ever ran into one again I could play with fire, i.e. hit it and quit it once the crazy got to be too much. But never again. They’re to be left alone completely, not even once with the causal sex
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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mrgoodstuff

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So you have been through this too? Directly?

Other things that are eerily similar between this girl and other ex's: artsy, like to paint, can't sleep, even with half a bottle of sleeping pills. All have almost nothing but male friends.

The good thing is I'm focusing on healing AND now that I see a pattern between this one and some other ex's I'm learning how to spot them and avoid them right away.
Whats the pattern?
 

jnMissouri

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Whats the pattern?

VERY attractive. Harder for other guys to get but senses my OCD which HPD women seek out (and according to studies I seek them out too) and makes it easy for me. Available to me, never hard to get, pursues me. Falls quickly. Artsy personality (HPD women struggle with logic, they are more emotional than most women and struggle with professional jobs requiring logic). Stay up all night even with sleeping pills, I'm talking 4-6 pills and still can't sleep. Almost all guy friends. Feminine looks and personality but aggressive in other ways, almost like a tom boy under neath while still being very feminine. The list goes on...
 

jnMissouri

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My biggest issue is closure. I feel like I don't have it and I'm always going to look back on her and wonder why. She even told me a few times she likes to ghost people so they don't have closure and leave them wondering. She'd do that from time to time when we argued, she'd say I guess you'll never know now will ya.
 

jnMissouri

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YEah, been through two of em. The first chick was a narcissist the second was a borderline. The narcissist chick damn rear ruined my life but the bpd has caused a few problems as well. IMO the narcs are more crafty and cunning whereas a bpd is a loose cannon, they’ve got no problem destroying themselves in the process of destroying you AND they are also violent. Whereas an NPD will vanish into thin air and leave you doubting your entire reality. What’s particularly disgustin about Narcissits is they keep up the act for a long time. You won’t ever see it coming. But yeah, I’ve been through it and what you’re experiencing, again, is textbook. Like literally right out of a book, standardbehavior for dudes who have been through this.

I will say this. It was my own fault tho for getting involved with the bpd, after the narcissist relationship I did a lot of reading and thought if I ever ran into one again I could play with fire, i.e. hit it and quit it once the crazy got to be too much. But never again. They’re to be left alone completely, not even once with the causal sex

Funny you say that. Chase Amante says the same thing. He says don't even talk to them is his advice. But he knows that guys won't listen and to some extent it's a right of passage for men. He went through it himself. He said he now doesn't stop people from going for these girls as long as they realize they are trouble and usually that's just a broken heart. He says it helps your game being with a hot crazy chic. It does. My first one did. But it damaged me too in other ways. She was the 10 everyone wanted. 3 years of hell and luckily she broke up with me for good and never talked again.

Last couple days I've done a lot of reading about personality disorders and how to spot these women and why I fall for them. Apparently OCD and HPD are magnetically drawn to each other. Their psychosis' complement and complete each other. She seeks the structure and stability, logic of the OCD person. He seeks the free spirit, fun, wild aspect of the HPD.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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