Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

There's NO such thing as the Feminine Imperative - Spaz version

Spaz

Banned
Joined
Jan 14, 2018
Messages
8,441
Reaction score
6,932
As the title suggests, it's the female imperative (not feminine) ONLY when she's alone or in a relationship whereby male leadership/influence has failed or is lacking.

It will then manifest into the dark side of the female imperative.

And there's nothing feminine about it. Remember that. It's toxic for both men and women alike.

Femininity only exist when a masculine presence is near to influence her. Remember this also.

You want a feminine woman ?

Be the man who has an abundance of masculinity - one who breaths, walks, talks, moves, thinks, etc and women will mold themselves towards you as an opposite, the feminine.
 

backseatjuan

Banned
Joined
Nov 2, 2011
Messages
4,474
Reaction score
1,657
Age
43
Location
Россия
Would you agree any types of female game, the rules, or whatever, is then is pure waste of time and a turn off. Somebody with an abundance perspective would just walk away.
 

Spaz

Banned
Joined
Jan 14, 2018
Messages
8,441
Reaction score
6,932
If you are playing within the female imperative then it's their rules and most men ends up being sucked into it, none the wiser.

Its abundance only when women are playing within ur rules, ur game and this would be the natural setting since u as a man is the PRIZE to be won over and not the other way round.

This is the masculine standard.
 
R

Ranger

Guest
It’s a funny thing. I no longer have a single consideration concerning women’s “game”, thoughts or even what they will do.
I don’t even see that stuff anymore. It’s completely irrelevant.
So there’s not too many posts lately that I even feel like commenting on.

All that stuff is just minutia or something to talk about when there’s nothing better to do. Personally I don’t think it matters.
There’s too much concentration on what women do or think. Who fukking cares.
I’ve been concentrating on my interactions with men and goals more than women lately. My workouts have been more powerful and I trashed a psycho at work with no more compunction than stepping on a bug. He earned it.
I did talk to two cuties today. A little bit of kino when we were laughing. No big deal. It really isn’t that big of a deal.

@Spaz is right. Not being with a masculine man and/or left to her own devices, they go a bit crazy. The only way she’s ever going to feel feminine and secure is when that masculine man stably holds the ground. That masculine presence is like a guide stone. Guidance via presence. Cause from a distance.

Her mind settles down and she can focus on more important things. I see the truth of it.
 
R

Ranger

Guest
It will then manifest into the dark side of the female imperative.

And there's nothing feminine about it. Remember that. It's toxic for both men and women alike.
I’ve let this post sink in deeper overnight. There is nothing feminine at all about the dark side. It’s actually a HUGE form of resentment and highly masculinized.
Resentment to having to deal with feminized men and resentment that she agreed to risk following you and you couldn’t even get that right.

She’s going to thrash you because you acted like a bug. Girls don’t normally like bugs. They squish them.
 

SoSuave666

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 9, 2012
Messages
1,130
Reaction score
874
This is no secret to experienced men. There are two forces in this world: masculine and feminine. Everyone is somewhere on the spectrum. The more masculine you are, the more feminine she becomes. The more **** tests you pass, the more feminine she becomes. The more you dismiss her disrespect, the more feminine she becomes. The moment you walk away because of bull****, the more feminine she becomes.

It's up to you as the man to keep your masculine energy strong. Always be flirting, indifferent, have standards, and self respect. Have a purpose other than women and droves of them will come to you. All energy is sexual, you should be putting out the most masculine sexual energy you can. Women want to be feminine...
 

fastlife

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 3, 2015
Messages
1,131
Reaction score
2,155
Totally agreed on a micro-level. In a vacuum, when you meet a girl or have frequent proximity with her, the influence of your polarity is the deciding force on the interaction & decides what version of that girl you're gonna get. Every girl has a sweet, submissive side & every girl has a cold, b1tchy side, etc.

The issue is what happens after you leave the venue. She talks to her girlfriends; what do they tell her? She reads some Me Too article; what does it tell her? She watches a rom com or a modern television series; what does it tell her?

Different girls have different half-lives; how long they're able to give themselves to your influence depends on their upbringing, surroundings, their default 'personality.' There are two potential problems here: 1.) You blame surrounding factors for the lack of your success and things you can control. Or 2.) You blame yourself for factors that were outside of your control.

IMO problem 1 is worse than problem 2. Nut up & live your life lol. But it's also naive to think that your frame, no matter how strong it is, can hold up indefinitely against the meta frame for every girl--especially once you're no longer right in front of her.
 

BeExcellent

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 16, 2015
Messages
4,614
Reaction score
6,452
Age
55
Advice from the old lady:

Why should I follow a man? On what grounds should I defer to him or respect him or give him the time of day? I’m a grown up with my shjt together. I don’t NEED a man to handle things in my life. But I desire a MAN. I need his masculine energy and polarity to allow me to relax into my feminine energy. I will devotedly care for him as he steadfastly protects me and he will build his life as I advise him & help him rise to meet his best self...and that will create for him a safe respite from his dealings in the world. It is a privilege as a woman to serve such a man; to struggle beside him...to see him strive to see him reach his aims, reset, and set about it again.

He must be worthy.

He must be a man’s man. A pursuer of his own purpose, a man of courage, integrity and conviction. Very few of these men exist now.

Be such a man.

I have but two questions I consider regarding men I might date or get involved with. Many factors influence the answers...but the answers must always be Yes....

1. Do I desire him sexually?
2. Can he lead me?

Only the masculine need apply. I am fortunate to be in relationship with such a man. In the time we’ve been involved I’ve watched him struggle and grow and wrestle his demons and chisel himself. It’s not been easy. But the man he is becoming is a sight to behold.

There is no such thing as the feminine imperative around a real man. Become one & you’ll see.
 

Atom Smasher

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 22, 2008
Messages
8,734
Reaction score
6,664
Age
66
Location
The 7th Dimension
Advice from the old lady:

Why should I follow a man? On what grounds should I defer to him or respect him or give him the time of day? I’m a grown up with my shjt together. I don’t NEED a man to handle things in my life. But I desire a MAN. I need his masculine energy and polarity to allow me to relax into my feminine energy. I will devotedly care for him as he steadfastly protects me and he will build his life as I advise him & help him rise to meet his best self...and that will create for him a safe respite from his dealings in the world. It is a privilege as a woman to serve such a man; to struggle beside him...to see him strive to see him reach his aims, reset, and set about it again.

He must be worthy.

He must be a man’s man. A pursuer of his own purpose, a man of courage, integrity and conviction. Very few of these men exist now.

Be such a man.

I have but two questions I consider regarding men I might date or get involved with. Many factors influence the answers...but the answers must always be Yes....

1. Do I desire him sexually?
2. Can he lead me?

Only the masculine need apply. I am fortunate to be in relationship with such a man. In the time we’ve been involved I’ve watched him struggle and grow and wrestle his demons and chisel himself. It’s not been easy. But the man he is becoming is a sight to behold.

There is no such thing as the feminine imperative around a real man. Become one & you’ll see.
Around here a lot of prospective "real men" are still wringing their hands over who pays for the first date LOL. The concept of becoming an authentic, well-rounded man doesn't seem to materialize until the thirties and forties in this day and age. It took me till my 50s to start to get it.

Fortunately, if ever there was a place where you can learn this stuff earlier, this is it.
 

samspade

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 5, 2008
Messages
7,996
Reaction score
5,054
I have but two questions I consider regarding men I might date or get involved with.
1. Do I desire him sexually?
2. Can he lead me?

Only the masculine need apply.
I pared this down and quoted it so it doesn't get lost in the shuffle.

#1 a man can influence, but only so much. #2 is well within his control.
 

Spaz

Banned
Joined
Jan 14, 2018
Messages
8,441
Reaction score
6,932
Advice from the old lady:

Why should I follow a man? On what grounds should I defer to him or respect him or give him the time of day? I’m a grown up with my shjt together. I don’t NEED a man to handle things in my life. But I desire a MAN. I need his masculine energy and polarity to allow me to relax into my feminine energy. I will devotedly care for him as he steadfastly protects me and he will build his life as I advise him & help him rise to meet his best self...and that will create for him a safe respite from his dealings in the world. It is a privilege as a woman to serve such a man; to struggle beside him...to see him strive to see him reach his aims, reset, and set about it again.

He must be worthy.

He must be a man’s man. A pursuer of his own purpose, a man of courage, integrity and conviction. Very few of these men exist now.

Be such a man.

I have but two questions I consider regarding men I might date or get involved with. Many factors influence the answers...but the answers must always be Yes....

1. Do I desire him sexually?
2. Can he lead me?

Only the masculine need apply. I am fortunate to be in relationship with such a man. In the time we’ve been involved I’ve watched him struggle and grow and wrestle his demons and chisel himself. It’s not been easy. But the man he is becoming is a sight to behold.

There is no such thing as the feminine imperative around a real man. Become one & you’ll see.
Well said BE.

You have changed and I trust it's because ur man has evolved further ?
 

Spaz

Banned
Joined
Jan 14, 2018
Messages
8,441
Reaction score
6,932
I’ve let this post sink in deeper overnight. There is nothing feminine at all about the dark side. It’s actually a HUGE form of resentment and highly masculinized.
This is the unfortunate side effect when men at large fail.

Masculinity = Femininity

They are equal in terms of strength but yet opposite to provide balance in a relationship - each feeding off the other in an never ending loop to be greater.
 

BeExcellent

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 16, 2015
Messages
4,614
Reaction score
6,452
Age
55
Well said BE.

You have changed and I trust it's because ur man has evolved further ?
Its funny Spaz because I haven't really changed too much I don't think, although its true that we are always changing as we go along in life.

My examples of real men started with my own father and all the great uncles in my family. All real men. All leaders and influencers of other men. All of them except my dad were married once and had vibrant traditional marriages with their spouse, and the women were strong people in their own right, but they defered and supported their men in the leadership role. My father was married thrice, and his 3rd wife (of 33 years) began as his mistress and she was beside him until his death. He did as he pleased, he lead, he expected (required) compliance and deference. My mother (his 2nd wife) and my step mother (3rd wife) were both strong women but my father required that they be subordinate to him. It wasn't even a question. He wasn't perfect. But he was a masculine man's man and a leader in every sense of the word. That's what I grew up around.

The man I am seeing now is similar to my father in many ways. He's a retired E9 from the military (leadership), has owned successful businesses (leadership), is handsome, sexy, and has an abundance mindset. He would be considered a natural with women and has had the long standing reputation as a player (as I've chronicled around here.) Women swarm around him. Literally. So much so that he's over it.

I bring a great deal to the table. I know my value. My BF tells me all the time that finding beautiful "hot" women is easy. That is observably true. I've seen it myself first hand. However lots of those pretty faces hide ugly people; damaged people; self absorbed shallow people. Replaceable people. People my BF doesn't like beyond looks or sex. Looks & sex will only go so far to connect people. Beyond that there has to be something else.

What has been happening steadily, albeit sometimes erratically, is that my BF is turning away from the player lifestyle and turning toward something deeper, something more meaningful, and something he has not experienced before. He is modifying his behavior. Not for me per se, for himself...but with an eye toward honoring the relationship. He also has had a health scare in recent months (resolvable) that has changed his perspective and caused him to drastically reduce his drinking, and he has over time realized the value I bring him as a partner, lover, confidant and friend. He has been vulnerable physically and emotionally. It has caused him to be more introspective, and more focused on what (and who) in his life is important.

He already knew I was a tough woman to replace because of the package that I am inside and out, but he has also seen me steadfast through his challenges, and steadfast through a few of my own. He is still his own man, is still decisive and sexy and ambitious and all that...but he is evolving. It's still a bumpy ride at times but we are becoming closer emotionally over time. The sex is the best now its ever been as we grow together. It soothes me to know the relationship is where it is. It allows me to relax into feminine energy juxaposed to his masculinity. He has this sense of amazement when he talks about how he feels; because he feels a great deal. He is allowing himself to feel, and so am I. He sees me as an asset to his life and someone with high standards such that he strives to be the man I need, even though in some areas he is not there yet. He believes that having me in his life makes him a better man (his statement - not mine.) And he tells people around him this all the time.

I knew who and what I was getting involved with from the get-go, and I knew that things would either evolve or fizzle...but I also knew that what I have to offer is rare and valuable, and I have been willing to exit the relationship if he can't/won't respect me. I respect myself although I have been quite patient with him and at times those things have been in conflict. Could I leave tomorrow? I could. Would it hurt? Of course. He has shown me over time through his actions that he values me, he values the relationship and he values himself more and more.

He is no longer wildly attention-seeking everywhere we go. He is more centered in himself and more comfortable in his own skin. He is less freaked out about "being alone", and he is less impulsive and self-destructive (much less in fact.)

So yes, he's evolving. And as he evolves I'm more willing to get deeper; to get closer; to follow his lead. It's been an interesting journey so far. We shall see what happens as time goes. We shall see.
 

Spaz

Banned
Joined
Jan 14, 2018
Messages
8,441
Reaction score
6,932
Its funny Spaz because I haven't really changed too much I don't think, although its true that we are always changing as we go along in life.

My examples of real men started with my own father and all the great uncles in my family. All real men. All leaders and influencers of other men. All of them except my dad were married once and had vibrant traditional marriages with their spouse, and the women were strong people in their own right, but they defered and supported their men in the leadership role. My father was married thrice, and his 3rd wife (of 33 years) began as his mistress and she was beside him until his death. He did as he pleased, he lead, he expected (required) compliance and deference. My mother (his 2nd wife) and my step mother (3rd wife) were both strong women but my father required that they be subordinate to him. It wasn't even a question. He wasn't perfect. But he was a masculine man's man and a leader in every sense of the word. That's what I grew up around.

The man I am seeing now is similar to my father in many ways. He's a retired E9 from the military (leadership), has owned successful businesses (leadership), is handsome, sexy, and has an abundance mindset. He would be considered a natural with women and has had the long standing reputation as a player (as I've chronicled around here.) Women swarm around him. Literally. So much so that he's over it.

I bring a great deal to the table. I know my value. My BF tells me all the time that finding beautiful "hot" women is easy. That is observably true. I've seen it myself first hand. However lots of those pretty faces hide ugly people; damaged people; self absorbed shallow people. Replaceable people. People my BF doesn't like beyond looks or sex. Looks & sex will only go so far to connect people. Beyond that there has to be something else.

What has been happening steadily, albeit sometimes erratically, is that my BF is turning away from the player lifestyle and turning toward something deeper, something more meaningful, and something he has not experienced before. He is modifying his behavior. Not for me per se, for himself...but with an eye toward honoring the relationship. He also has had a health scare in recent months (resolvable) that has changed his perspective and caused him to drastically reduce his drinking, and he has over time realized the value I bring him as a partner, lover, confidant and friend. He has been vulnerable physically and emotionally. It has caused him to be more introspective, and more focused on what (and who) in his life is important.

He already knew I was a tough woman to replace because of the package that I am inside and out, but he has also seen me steadfast through his challenges, and steadfast through a few of my own. He is still his own man, is still decisive and sexy and ambitious and all that...but he is evolving. It's still a bumpy ride at times but we are becoming closer emotionally over time. The sex is the best now its ever been as we grow together. It soothes me to know the relationship is where it is. It allows me to relax into feminine energy juxaposed to his masculinity. He has this sense of amazement when he talks about how he feels; because he feels a great deal. He is allowing himself to feel, and so am I. He sees me as an asset to his life and someone with high standards such that he strives to be the man I need, even though in some areas he is not there yet. He believes that having me in his life makes him a better man (his statement - not mine.) And he tells people around him this all the time.

I knew who and what I was getting involved with from the get-go, and I knew that things would either evolve or fizzle...but I also knew that what I have to offer is rare and valuable, and I have been willing to exit the relationship if he can't/won't respect me. I respect myself although I have been quite patient with him and at times those things have been in conflict. Could I leave tomorrow? I could. Would it hurt? Of course. He has shown me over time through his actions that he values me, he values the relationship and he values himself more and more.

He is no longer wildly attention-seeking everywhere we go. He is more centered in himself and more comfortable in his own skin. He is less freaked out about "being alone", and he is less impulsive and self-destructive (much less in fact.)

So yes, he's evolving. And as he evolves I'm more willing to get deeper; to get closer; to follow his lead. It's been an interesting journey so far. We shall see what happens as time goes. We shall see.
Yes you have changed.

When a person writes or post, it's easy to decipher a person's state of mind. You sound happier.

When ur man evolves further so will ur femininity, it grows in tandem. It's inevitable.

And I firmly believe from my own experiences with women that I've had the privilege of knowing that they are at their happiest when femininity embraces their soul.

Perhaps one fine day I'll write of my observations/experiences - how feminity benefits a woman.

It's a real pity that many women are denied this.

Be well BE.
 
Top