"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

Coworker at the office, last day move

jaysonjw

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So there's a shy girl giving me numerous IOI's at the office. She's in the same dept but we have never spoken. She know's who I am & I was sure she had some interest. Too many numerous IOI to be all coincidences. Plus my female coworker friend also noticed a few of them too.

Long story short, I got told 20 mins before the end of the day Thursday it was my last day at this project (Cutting costs + being redeployed to another clients project). Therefore wouldn't see her again. She was in a meeting so I rolled the dice & sent a quick email along the lines of:

"Hey, I always see you around but I've never really spoken to you.

This is super random, but I just got told it's my last day on this project here. I just wanted to ask if you'd like to grab coffee sometime?.

Phone number xxxx xxx xxx"

Weak move I know, but i didn't see any other option at that stage. A day or so later I haven't heard from her. My friend said she was at work the next day so would have seen the email. I thought at least I'd get hit with the "Thanks but I got a bf" text. Being the shy type of girl putting the onus on her to text me wasn't a good idea I know.

Should I consider this a write off now?.

A couple of my gal friends said even if she was interested she probably wouldn't text first being shy + maybe try and start a convo on Fb Messenger after a week. (She isnt on my list so this would be risky)
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Young OG

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So there's a shy girl giving me numerous IOI's at the office. She's in the same dept but we have never spoken. She know's who I am & I was sure she had some interest. Too many numerous IOI to be all coincidences. Plus my female coworker friend also noticed a few of them too.

Long story short, I got told 20 mins before the end of the day Thursday it was my last day at this project (Cutting costs + being redeployed to another clients project). Therefore wouldn't see her again. She was in a meeting so I rolled the dice & sent a quick email along the lines of:

"Hey, I always see you around but I've never really spoken to you.

This is super random, but I just got told it's my last day on this project here. I just wanted to ask if you'd like to grab coffee sometime?.

Phone number xxxx xxx xxx"

Weak move I know, but i didn't see any other option at that stage. A day or so later I haven't heard from her. My friend said she was at work the next day so would have seen the email. I thought at least I'd get hit with the "Thanks but I got a bf" text. Being the shy type of girl putting the onus on her to text me wasn't a good idea I know.

Should I consider this a write off now?.

A couple of my gal friends said even if she was interested she probably wouldn't text first being shy + maybe try and start a convo on Fb Messenger after a week. (She isnt on my list so this would be risky)
You shouldn't have sent the email. If you knew you would eventually go onto another project, then why didn't you approach her before? If the problem was that there are always other people around, then you could have just simply asked her for a minute. I'm sure she would have talked to you real quick. You snooze, you lose. Don't hesitate and have some balls next time.

If you haven't heard anything yet, then I doubt you will. I wouldn't start a convo on FB messenger with her unless you want to come off as a stalker. Time to move onto another girl.
 

marvinlfloresq

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Just wait. I am sure she read it. Nothing wrong with an email & there was valid reason, since you are leaving. Give it a week. She may reach out, if not then let it go.

Next time you meet someone you like, ask them out in person.
 

Vivacity

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Should I consider this a write off now?.
Yes. I would be surprised if you get a reply from her. Don't send another message to this girl in writing.

Pursue other girls, and in the future, always ask girls out in person or via a phone call, if that is possible.

The more the human contact at the time of asking, the higher the chance of landing a date. In person > Phone call > Text message.
Emails, facebook, and twitter messages, you have a very low chance.
 
Last edited:

jaysonjw

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I'm a bit thrown off. Not use to rejection / no response from girls. I wouldnt have even bothered if there wasnt IOI's as she's average. But she seemed intriguing & worth getting to know.

Also I wasnt aware I was being moved to another project. Two other staff got told at the same time as me.

Oh well, will see if anything happens.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

Spaz

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Have the courtesy to approach her and ask her out face to face for some coffee.

If you get rejected that's fine, you know not to pursue her anymore.

If not that's fine too, you get an opportunity to find out if she's interesting.

Either way you lose nothing but gain something.

So what's the problem ?
 

jaysonjw

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Have the courtesy to approach her and ask her out face to face for some coffee.

If you get rejected that's fine, you know not to pursue her anymore.

If not that's fine too, you get an opportunity to find out if she's interesting.

Either way you lose nothing but gain something.

So what's the problem ?
I really dont think you read or took into account the details.
 

Spaz

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I read enough to know that you took the cowardly way out and emailed her instead of approaching.

The rest of ur postings is littered with excuses as to WHY you can't this or that.

Not a good enough reason to be cowardly.
 
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