Wanting to break NC with BPD ex

[DreamAgain]

How can I stop thinking about her? Like the thoughts have died down but I still keep thinking about her

This is tricky. Suppose I tell you the following: think about anything except pink elephants. What's the first thing you're going to think about?

The key isn't to stop thinking about her. It's to just think about other things. Your work, your hobbies, other women. Over time and through the healing process, she'll no longer haunt your mind.

 

[Dingo]

Do it.. Do it...

Then come back and share the awesome experience.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

It’s been a little over a month now of NC and I really want to message her. I find myself missing her even after what she did to me. We dated for 7 years (I’m 21 and she is 20). She left me a week before our 7 yr anniversary for a guy she started hanging out with a week or so prior. She told me she developed feelings for him and wanted to make herself happy for once. I asked her why she felt no remorse and she said because she thought it was funny what she was doing to me. So I know it’s idiotic for me to want to talk to her but I’m really struggling not to.

How low is your testosterone?

I recommend you have it check. Also, search for your balls. They haven't dropped yet.

 

[Mr.Mac55]

It's tough, it takes time. Read a book. Make a list of all the things you will do with your new free time. Or make a list of what you'll do with all that money you're not spending on her!

Hey, I'm on Day One of NC (I was dumped yesterday at 10:00am) and she's already texting me with "I miss you!!".....soooo hard not to text her back. I'm going to head to bed soon and try and get a good night's sleep, but tomorrow I plan to get back into some hobbies that I've been neglecting the last 9 months I've been with her.

 

[DreamAgain]

It's tough, it takes time. Read a book. Make a list of all the things you will do with your new free time. Or make a list of what you'll do with all that money you're not spending on her!

Hey, I'm on Day One of NC (I was dumped yesterday at 10:00am) and she's already texting me with "I miss you!!".....soooo hard not to text her back. I'm going to head to bed soon and try and get a good night's sleep, but tomorrow I plan to get back into some hobbies that I've been neglecting the last 9 months I've been with her.

Man getting that type of text makes going no contact x100 times easier. Imagine getting just radio silence from her, after getting cheated on and disrespected maximally. That was my case. Not even the common courtesy to get an "it's over, thanks for the good memories" message.

It looks like yours has a soul at least.

 

[Mr.Mac55]

Man getting that type of text makes going no contact x100 times easier. Imagine getting just radio silence from her, after getting cheated on and disrespected maximally. That was my case. Not even the common courtesy to get an "it's over, thanks for the good memories" message.

It looks like yours has a soul at least.

Damn man, that's tough! Yeah, I was pretty much expecting complete radio silence from her so when I saw that text I was like "aw, ****....why???!!" On one hand it was nice to see she's still thinking about me and probably debating her own decision to end it, but on the other hand I'd spent the last two days convincing myself why I was better off without her and was ready to move on.

If I end up dealing with her at all, I know it will never be the same again and I'm guessing she wants validation that I still care. But whatever. She should have thought about that before she pulled the trigger.

 

[DreamAgain]

Damn man, that's tough! Yeah, I was pretty much expecting complete radio silence from her so when I saw that text I was like "aw, ****....why???!!" On one hand it was nice to see she's still thinking about me and probably debating her own decision to end it, but on the other hand I'd spent the last two days convincing myself why I was better off without her and was ready to move on.

If I end up dealing with her at all, I know it will never be the same again and I'm guessing she wants validation that I still care. But whatever. She should have thought about that before she pulled the trigger.

Things can never really be the same. Trust is permanently lost, no matter how much mental gymnastics we try.

Stay strong, on to the next one .

 

[Kevind553]

Man getting that type of text makes going no contact x100 times easier. Imagine getting just radio silence from her, after getting cheated on and disrespected maximally. That was my case. Not even the common courtesy to get an "it's over, thanks for the good memories" message.

It looks like yours has a soul at least.

Exactly the way mine did me, ever since I moved out a month ago she has said nothing to me