Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Does it seem like she’s lost interest?

Sgthaytham

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So we had our first date last week, and then I sent her a text and organised a second date for this weekend.

We’re meant to go for a little hike then a picnic together, but she’s worried the weather is going to be a bit off. She has suggested we go to the seaside, which is a 2 hour drive away... but it feels like she’s trying to blow me off.

She said she’d be in touch tomorrow...

I don’t know, maybe I’m overthink... do you think she’s lost interest?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Billtx49

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I don’t know, maybe I’m overthink... do you think she’s lost interest?
Yes on overthink. She made a counter offer based on the weather.
Tomorrow will tell on the interest level. If she’s still up for the beach, make it a fun outing.
 

Sgthaytham

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Yes on overthink. She made a counter offer based on the weather.
I thought that was the case too when she asked if I thought going to the ocean was a good idea.

I looked up the weather for the weekend, and it doesn’t look good either. The South of France has been hit with storms.

I told her about the weather issues and said we could always stay closer to home and go bowling or play some pool and she just says “We’ll see Friday (winky face)”

I know waiting till tomorrow is the way to go, but I felt her response was a bit of a blow off.
 

Billtx49

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Her Friday comment is likely only about waiting to see what the latest weather report is…
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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flowtheory

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I would make potential plans with another woman to have a back-up plan. She definitely sounds wishy washy a little. Its hard to know the truth without the exact text convo presented for us.
Usually when a person wants to wait until the day of the confirm, they are waiting to see what someone else’s plans are.

You’re also letting her lead, so she has the control here, which is causing you to trip out. It’s good she suggested an alternate plan, but two hours just to drive there? That’s a huge time commitment for a second date; someone you havent slept with.
 
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Billtx49

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Usually when a person wants to wait until the day of the confirm, they are waiting to see what someone else’s plans are.
True. He’s only one date in and doesn’t yet know if she has other men on her schedule. On the other hand, I would welcome the opportunity to wisk her away to the shore. Being two hours out it could easily be turned into an overnighter at a beach bungalow…
 

Sgthaytham

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Usually when a person wants to wait until the day of the confirm, they are waiting to see what someone else’s plans are.
Possibly, but we’re waiting and hoping the weather clears up by Friday, since the date was organised for Saturday.


I’m not aware of any other guy in the picture, which is always a possibility...

Will have to wait and see what she says tomorrow.
 

Sgthaytham

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True. He’s only one date in and doesn’t yet know if she has other men on her schedule. On the other hand, I would welcome the opportunity to wisk her away to the shore. Being two hours out it could easily be turned into an overnighter at a beach bungalow…
A 2 hour drive to the beach could indeed make it a fun day out... fingers crossed the weather improves. Storm as we speak :/

Really weird how the North is getting highs of 28-30 C and we’re getting 15-20 C this time of year...
 

Billtx49

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A 2 hour drive to the beach could indeed make it a fun day out... fingers crossed the weather improves. Storm as we speak :/

Really weird how the North is getting highs of 28-30 C and we’re getting 15-20 C this time of year...
Yep, the weather is highly variable these days. Something to remember when planning outside things. Texas can be the same…
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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Reykhel

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Sacrebleu mon pote! That's a lot of time to spend together for a second date.....and on the weekend.

You are putting all of your eggs in the one basket, n'est pas?

So let's see.....a second date and you're going to spend two hours in a car with this girl, how many hours at the beach and
then a two hour drive to return. ça fera mal.

You're worried about interest level already. how about slowly building her interest level by having shorter hook ups and saving these
all day "dates" until she has established interest level/is your girlfriend/an established plate?

Qu'en penses-tu?
 

flowtheory

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Possibly, but we’re waiting and hoping the weather clears up by Friday, since the date was organised for Saturday.

Will have to wait and see what she says tomorrow.
And you’re the one waiting. Not her. You’re making excuses for her. Youre listening to her words over looking at her actions.

She’s tripping you out and not being solid. So much so you have made a post. Your interest exceeds hers greatly.
 

Sgthaytham

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Sacrebleu mon pote! That's a lot of time to spend together for a second date.....and on the weekend.

You are putting all of your eggs in the one basket, n'est pas?

So let's see.....a second date and you're going to spend two hours in a car with this girl, how many hours at the beach and
then a two hour drive to return. ça fera mal.

You're worried about interest level already. how about slowly building her interest level by having shorter hook ups and saving these
all day "dates" until she has established interest level/is your girlfriend/an established plate?

Qu'en penses-tu?
N’est-ce pas*

She’s the one who suggested the ocean. My date ideas was if the weather was nice, we’d drive 50 mins to a lake; if not we’d visit a museum and have a picnic of sorts in the park.

We spent 7 hours together on our first date.

Now, I understand she might think going to a lake in the foothills only for the heavens to open on us isn’t great, I agree, but it wasn’t I who put forward the idea of driving a couple hours to the sea..
 

Sgthaytham

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And you’re the one waiting. Not her. You’re making excuses for her. Youre listening to her words over looking at her actions.

She’s tripping you out and not being solid. So much so you have made a post. Your interest exceeds hers greatly.
She quite literally said she’d be in touch tomorrow, so obviously I’m going to wait...?

What “actions” exactly?
 

Reykhel

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N’est-ce pas*
C'est gentil.

We spent 7 hours together on our first date.
You are ****ting me. I sleep less than that during the night. You spent the equivalent of a good night's sleep and more on a first date with
a girl. How do you have that much time to spare for a first date?

My date ideas was if the weather was nice, we’d drive 50 mins to a lake
50 minute drive? and the return. this is overkill, you are putting way too much time and effort into one girl. too much too soon.

What are you looking for exactly with this nana?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Sgthaytham

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C'est gentil.



You are ****ting me. I sleep less than that during the night. You spent the equivalent of a good night's sleep and more on a first date with
a girl. How do you have that much time to spare for a first date?
We met up at 7:30pm for dinner (original plan). When we were having our deserts she asked if I wanted to go get some drinks. After drinks we stood around our cars talking.

I’m currently renovating an Auberge Monday to Saturday, with Sundays off. Pretty much self explanatory why I was able to go on for so long on the first date. It must have been a good date, IMO.

50 minute drive? and the return. this is overkill, you are putting way too much time and effort into one girl. too much too soon.

What are you looking for exactly with this nana?
I live in the countryside, she lives in a town. That’s a 45 min drive to see eachother - what’s the big deal?

Even back in London it took me 45 mins to go see my ex and vice versa when we were dating...

Just looking to have fun dating and discovering a lovely young French girl...
 

Reykhel

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We met up at 7:30pm for dinner (original plan). When we were having our deserts she asked if I wanted to go get some drinks. After drinks we stood around our cars talking.
Early for dinner in France. Granted yeah I can see how it could go on for a while if you hit if off at dinner, normal to do drinks after..........no sexual chemistry? you didn't try escalate? drinks back at someone's house? standing at cars talking? no kiss?

I’m currently renovating an Auberge Monday to Saturday, with Sundays off. Pretty much self explanatory why I was able to go on for so long on the first date. It must have been a good date, IMO.
I guess. Sure if you're a foreigner than I guess the longer the better for you (foreigner: maybe not having social circle, established friends etc)

I live in the countryside, she lives in a town. That’s a 45 min drive to see eachother - what’s the big deal?
no, I thought you meant you would be driving 50 minutes to the lake.....together. No big deal.

Just looking to have fun dating and discovering a lovely young French girl...
Well, wait until tomorrow I'm sure you'll be seeing her again this weekend.

Enjoy, escalate
 

flowtheory

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She quite literally said she’d be in touch tomorrow, so obviously I’m going to wait...?

What “actions” exactly?
She’s saying we’ll see. Her action isn’t confirming to see you, even though you suggested alternatives to the outdoor idea. A woman with high interest would say tomorrow’s great and it be locked down. She hasn’t down that. It’s all in the air; but you think she’s waiting for the weather.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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